Blurred reality

[Mason]

[DAY 1]

If she could sit, that was what she was doing. Blankly stunned as she felt herself in some state of non-existence and existence. In which all that was present was like a charcoal drawing that had been scrubbed by water. A distorted colorless semi-existence.

She wasn't sure if she was looking, or feeling, the world around her. She tried to see her hands, and they were just a vague blur. A poor mimicry of humanity. The true appearance of a vampire.

If there was even a body to cry tears, they would. She knelt on the ground. Thinking of the culprits for her death. Knowing that long ago...she could have been one of them. Destroying a thing of shadow and filth. Knowing that she would once consider this deserved. In some ways she still felt it to be that way.

She felt hatred for them, and for herself, but yet she couldn't actually blame them. They killed her because of what she was, something she would have done herself. And now she was seeing what she believed she really looked like. And it hurt.

She wasn't human. She was some mockery of humanity that relied on their blood to keep up the lie. And now here she was. She knew only so much about the Shadow Realm. Mainly, that it was where vampires went when they died. And it took about a week before they could get back, in her experience as a paladin, she gleaned that.

And now she got to experience what she put others through.

She felt something, or saw something, another shape, vague and blurred. And then a voice...a familiar voice. "Cursed and cowardly! Alike corse river rocks to the feet! Wretched flesh of wretched minds! Benign action brought to end by crooked cruelty of beastly versions of mankind!"

Mason had never heard Warren angry. Or so clear, he almost often talked in such confusing lines. And sure he spoke a little odd, but it was obvious what he was saying. She had no idea how he got here though, she hadn't summoned him, and she didn't think he could travel back and forth. "What?" she could barely manage.

His answer came just as angrily, "Symbols, words, and horrid fae-ish intervention. Cruel creation, crueler fate."

However, when he next spoke, they were words of advice, not cursing those who brought her, and him, here. They became suddenly much calmer and rather kind even, "Search and feed on the un-alike. Abnormalities will heal and regenerate before your departure. Do not fear the departure. It is not return for you. Remember me when you escape I ask. I have fulfilled my role to you, I ask the contract we agreed on remains intact upon your departure."

After that the wraith left. Walking away from Mason who would be left alone with herself. She would learn to feed on the spirits. But today was a day of mourning and pain for her. It was to finally be forced to begin to no longer try and ignore what she was. Acceptance wasn't so easy.

[Mason]

It almost felt like a survival story to her in hidnsight. She walked, far as she could, searching for the spirits. Hours went by where it was an actual effort, then it just started turning to a pattern as her mind started drifting. She could feel the change each time she took them. It wasn't the same as feeding on humans, it was...different. There was a similar power that some used in the true world, but she had not yet gained access to such a thing. 

Warren was sometimes there, the one familiar shadow. But he seemed to be even less aware than she was. Simply staring straight up as he sat still. She didn't ever look up, and even when she realized such was the case...she didn't feel the urge to do so. She almost felt like if she did she'd find herself looking at a gaping maw, oozing some kind of black saliva just waiting for her to look at it so it could suck her in.

She had no idea where she got that idea. But she refused to risk that her imagination wasn't just some kind of premonition. And so she just kept walking, sucking in spirit after spirit that she found.

She replayed the events as she walked. More to keep her mind on something than to actually reminisce or sulk. The dullness of this reality made her feel sick. The word wasn't bored, but it was something similar. An unbusyness that upset the mind. It illicit some kind of extreme emotion but she had no word for whatever that emotion was.

It made her think, about Warren. He had been here decades, maybe centuries, before she pulled him out as a wraith. It almost hurt her more to know how he must have changed. How far it had driven him from his mind. And how far it could drive her from her own. There really was no day or not. Or if there was, she couldn't tell. The only change was this rippling of reality.

For now, she just planned to survive by doing what Warren told her to do. And just maybe she'd make it out of this with a part of her mind still intact.

[Mason]

Warren was next to her. Two vague bodies crossing the vastness of this...existence. It was so large, yet so contained. So little area to traverse, yet it felt like it was infinitely the same. "Why can you not return like I can?" she asked him. It was the first time she'd legitimately asked that question. And she wasn't sure she'd get a clear answer or not. Though she'd started to get his ramblings a little more often.

"Where you were not, I was. Power of the truth pulled me deeper. It does not matter. I became what I am. And what I am is an image of what I was. It does not matter what, but where. And here is only truth of one. I want both truth and lies of all that is. Appreciation for change is grown here. Appreciation for all that is not here, even lies, even pain. You will learn this." He told her. He talked a lot more too her now, maybe it was because of how she was. Maybe it was because she was much more willing to listen, it wasn't like she had anything else to do. "You know too little, but will know more. You have time. Do not break slowly. Break fast. Break fast to repair. Break slowly and repair will never come. You will only continue to break and shatter. And then you can never return complete."

She was pretty sure he meant her mind right then. It sounded like he just wanted her to accept things even more, fully embrace her circumstances. So that the harm couldn't keep hurting her. And that if she tried to fight too much, she might turn out like him. Incapable of even formulating every thought properly. At least, that's what she was pretty sure he was saying.

"What about the people? The ones who sent me here?" She asked, not knowing if he would know what to do about them or not. She didn't want to return, she hadn't even managed to get out yet.

She was pretty sure he nodded thoughtfully, "A battle lost. Stronger beings, more power, more skill. More friends. Roots remained, but the flower was cut. Alone you will be cut again. Patience is a friend, ask them for help. Find your family. And become who you become."

She had to think on some of what he said. Alright, so don't attack them. At least not right now. She was weaker than they were, but she would return. She assumed by family he meant those from the same sires line. Or, maybe the line around him. Henry Craven's...family. The last part she didn't understand. She didn't realize exactly what a Mystic vampire was, having avoided much talk with other vampires in truth. And that meant she didn't know what would happen when she left the Shadow Realm.

"I want to see my hands again." She said quietly. It was a weird thing she'd never even considered as something she'd say. But viewing only these...shadows. It felt so wrong.

"You shall see hands. I shall not." He responded simply.

Things were going to change for her. They were with each day in the Shadow Realm. She became more and more like a vampire.

[Mason]

Today was a bit different. It was full of silence. She sat, looking at her hands, legs, arms, the shadowy appearance she had. Almost formless. Humanoid, yet not human. What was once mockery became simply what is. And because of that, she was lost. Lost on what to do, lost on where to go, and lost on who or what she was now. For so long she had seen vampire as only creatures to be destroyed or held back. Even when she might think otherwise for an individual, her sheer hatred for the race itself often remained.

But now, the emotion itself was gone. And so also was any drive to enforce that emotion. She wanted normality. She wanted to admire art, glance at stars, walk through a quiet forest, talk to people. Simple things. Those were not available right now. All that there was right now was patience.

Warren remained sometimes, here or there. But he was distracted, like the shadow realm simply...sucked him into it mentally as much as it had physically. Mason was pretty sure it hadn't driven her insane. But she couldn't really be sure right now.

[Mason]

It felt like dreaming. Her eyes opened as she leaned against a wall, she could see the moon, feel the air again. But she felt a bit...off. And she was incredibly hungry. She could hear people nearby, hear creatures as well, zombies. She looked up, the Quarantine Zone was nearby. She recognized that.

But now what. "The hogs." she said before she touched her throat and furrowed her brow. Her voice was wrong, and it felt like she had to push the words out. She felt a pressure from something. Her tattoos were gone, but that wasn't a surprise, she died. She was wearing clothes but...they weren't familiar ones. It was a dress, and she rarely wore dresses let alone ones she didn't recognize. Skirts fine, dresses were for special occasions.

Since when did the Shadow Realm give one clothes and....she clenched her stomach and crouched down groaning. Right, blood she thought, almost afraid to speak again. She was pretty sure she knew where the pigs were and whatever right or wrong about the circumstances she needed something soon and fast, and she didn't want to be drinking on people.

It wasn't hard to find the place, and she spent almost half an hour hungril feeding on pig after pig. Naturally, it was not the most pleasant or clean experience. But starved or not a pig wasn't going to have enough strength to stop her from filling her stomach today.

She felt her mind return to her bit by bit, felt her concern grow and yet it could not exceed what she once had. She couldn't remember the last two or three days in the Shadow Realm. At least not in specific terms. It felt like...some level of acceptance. She felt calmer in some ways than she had been for...a long time. Since she was human probably.


What is this? Mason’s eyes widened as she heard her thoughts, or, thought she did. She was pretty sure that was her. Her body was wrong. She felt slightly smaller. Her hands were wrong, the clothes, the voice. Everything was different but she couldn’t quite perfect what had happened.

So she tried to reach the one person she’d been able to speak with for awhile, Warren. She fulfilled her promise, bringing him back into the real world. She looked at...well nothing. But she knew she did it right, and then he spoke.

”Agreement for both remade.” Warren moved to the side, ”Again I walk. You must re-learn. You must be alone. You must see.”

Again, only partially understood. Making her way towards her apartment thinking with a furrowed brow when she ran into someone unexpected. The Collector. He...well he was a disturbing looking figure. But he offered her something, something that was hard to turn down. A human ID. Before she returned, she’d not consider such a thing. Not even remotely, but right now, for some reason. She was ok with it. In fact, she wanted it. Maybe it could help avoid some of the circumstances that had brought her to the Shadow Realm last time, well not perfectly, but maybe for some.

But, he wanted cash, a great deal of cash. She promised to return and went to her apartment. She still felt some kind of pressure. However...the walk wasn’t right. She was walking by pure instinct and even putting in the key was instinct. It was like dreaming. Just barely thinking on what she was doing until she saw the mirror.

There was a reflection, and it wasn’t hers. She stepped forward, pressing her fingers against the glass with wide eyes and staring at it. Baffled. This wasn’t her apartment, this wasn’t her appearance and...


Jamie she glanced to the side to see another woman looking at her through the entrance with a raised eyebrow. She’d never seen the woman before, yet...she heard herself think her name?

"Something wrong?" The woman asked. Mason heard a screaming, but it wasn't hers. She hesitated. Blinking momentarily trying to speed herself out of the situation. "Uh, sorry, just having a bit of an identity crisis."

Jamie snorted and rolled her eyes, "Right, it's the new job. Haven't even truly started and you're already freaking out. Listen, just came by to drop this off. Catch!" she threw a letter with surprising skill which mason snapped out of the air to the woman's momentary surprise.

"I knew you were faking!" She said pointing her finger, "Anyway, you need to get your address changed still. I'm getting all your mail. Adios!"

"Ah right, adios!" Mason responded waving the letter and watching the woman leave, well not before Jamie gave a glance of suspicion over her shoulder.

Mason locked the door behind her and looked at the letter, addressed "Sadie Elder." She felt her stomach drop as she stared up at the mirror. She was right, it wasn't her reflection. It was Sadie's. Sadie, who was human. Sadie who was being forced out to make room for the soul of a vampire. If she wasn't already gone.

"No, just move on. This is how things are now. Can't stress over it. That failed you last time. Keep walking." She told herself, she received some cash again almost from memory and left. Receiving the ID that she now realized may or may not even be needed. An ID that was also stained with blood...lovely. That was going to work out just lovely.

And then she returned to Sadie's apartment. Locked the doors. Shut the windows. And sat down, staring at the mirror as if it would reach out and grab her. Pulling her back into the Shadow Realm. She heard a hum. Oh but that was a familiar hum.

"Just one to remain. The first one to claim. Take the form and take the place. Remain the same in every case" Warren hummed.

She looked at the direction his voice came from, "I....I took someone elses body?" she could still barely believe it. Sure, she knew that vampires could control some humans and had great powers. Coming back from the dead to. But shoving out someone from their own body? That was...a new one.

"Phantoms exchanged, mortal for immortal. One replaced for another. It is your path to appear that which you are not." He told her. Mystic. Mason had run into some other vampires before but as a paladins he'd never really realized how vampires returned. She saw how most of them died and how a few even returned to their bodies. But this was...different.

And yet, she was accepting it. So much faster than before. She looked back at the mirror, cocking her head and running her fingers through her hair, "This is me now." she muttered, "I can be Sadie for now."

She thought she heard a whispered shout. But it was gone. Now it was time to take her place. Become Sadie. She had a human reflection, she had a human ID. Those could potentially really help. Now it was just a matter of figuring out who Sadie was.

Such as this new job of hers.