Tales of the Little Scorpian.

[Scorpia]

So I finally get a chance to sit down with my lap top and start my diary. Seems the only place safe to keep it is here on my laptop and that is password protected. Now I have a safe place to think about things.

I'm laying on the sofa right now and my Micah.. my dear sweet wonderful Micah is sound asleep. I don't know what I would do without him. He understands me and let's me be me. How we met must had been fate because in all honesty I had planned to kill him. But there was something about him that even now as I write this I have to smile.

Micah was there for me when things went bad with Silver. And boy did they go bad. Instead of writing what happen that night I rather just put it out of my mind and let the healing of forgiveness begin. I have in fact forgiven Silver and what he did to me. That comes from the help of Micah. He is showing me a side of me I didn't know I had. A kinder more understanding side. Oddly enough it only comes out when I am around him. Or.. it could be the way he kisses me. ****, that man can kiss.

Well I am a bit worn out now with all this government stuff. Kinda crazy I am running for a position. I think I have a snowball chance in hell with winning but **** it. I'm giving it my best and staying honest. Ok so a sleeping Micah is to tempting, so for now I will end this entry and lock my laptop. I have the need to feel his arms around me so that I can sleep peacefully.

[Scorpia]

Well it's been a bit since I had the free time to type. My wonderful Micah is relaxing and I am here thinking over the things that have been going on. Can't really say much has happen. The election was fun. It's still going on but will or lose it doesn't matter. I made a point that even underdogs can be heard.

Micah has sired a childe. Great kid. I think he is going to do very well. I have faith in him. Oh before I forget. I had a bit of fun tonight. It seems that Reyna has gotten her thongs twisted and while I was out picking pockets she attacked me. Now I don't know why nor do I really give a ****. BUT and this is the funny part. She missed me Every attack she did on me I was able to hit back and believe me I hit my mark. She ran and hid. Only problem is she got blood on my ******* Doc Martins. UGH!

Anyway Micah is looking way to tempting right now. So I'm making this short and going to make love to my mate.

[Scorpia]

So here I am sitting at my laptop my mind is buzzing like a beehive. I don't know what to do. Things are so confusing. I am now married to Micah, I am heading a family that is growing fast. Some nights I feel like I am in over my head. I love Micah and my family.. but sometimes.. I think things were easier when I was looking out just for myself. I know I can defend myself.. but can I keep a clear head and be able to protect them like I want to? If I mess up will they lose their faith in me?

I am also dealing with Micah and his hatred towards Silver. He doesn't understand how I can still be nice to a man that has done me wrong. I wish I knew the answer to that myself. But all I can say is Silver isn't all that evil. Perhaps some part of me does love Silver. Not that it would ever effect my feelings for Micah. But maybe that is why I feel the need to still look out for Silver. It sounds confusing and maybe it is.. but it makes sense to me.

My family is getting stronger every night. I see the determination in their eyes. They want to be the best and believe me.. they will be. Hel Ezra is going to be one hell of a telepath. Despite his outward appearance the boy is as bright as they come. Dimi I think will be a great fighter. Mal.. that boy is going to be a better shadow then I am some day. Aura, so beautiful and sweet. Her heart is gold. Caleb my grandchild. The boy makes me laugh. I love how he interacts with his sire Hel. Hel is doing a great job with him. Then there is Vaughn.. the oldest. Vaughn is special and dear to me. He is trying so hard to make us proud.. and I am. Truly I am proud of him. I just wish he would allow more to get close to him.

But I guess this brings me back to my original thought. Am I strong enough to protect these amazing vampires that taught me that family is good to have? Can I continue to make them just as proud of me as I am of them? These fears keep me awake as I lay next to Micah. I just wish my brain would calm down.. make the buzzing stop.

My body is growing weak and I know it is time to rest. Perhaps tonight I will sleep and my mind will clear allowing me to see things differently. To make better strategies. Time will tell and I have all the time in the world.