Comma on laptop is shot...apologies
It has been awhile since I sat and wrote. Not sure if it has been a time constraint or merely that i have not had much to say. It has been a long few weeks... minutes have turned into hours...days into weeks. Time has slipped so quickly from my grasp that it is hard to even recall what day it is.
My days are spent in the sewers..hunting and killing. I have begun to take great pleasure in death and having one die at my hand. i suppose it is the darkness that Trahir spoke of... it surely has made its way into my soul. Thing is... it serves a purpose. As a human we have the ego to protect us..it helps us to think without emotion..it is the red devil on our shoulder. The ego is a powerful part of the human psyche... more so than any other part. The issue is that sometimes our ego takes over. It begins to run our lives...protecting us from everything. With this protection comes a loss of our humanity and basically a loss of ourselves. Some are better at fighting the ego... keeping it at bay. Others..so many others let it consume them...it drives them. This is the state of humanity...egos protecting from things that could even be contsrued as positives. It is like it does not want to relinquish control once it has it. So humans go through their lives thinking they are living while they are actually far from that. They are merely existing...
This holds true for the darkness as well... it may not be a driving force like the ego... but it certainly tries to protect. How else could i do as I do...kill without remorse..without feeling. It is easy and becoming easier. Then issue is the targets that I have been killing are too easy... I crave new ones and not ones that give no challenge. I have formed a list in my head... a ist of targets.
Some will die easily... some will take more time. It will all come in time.