ashes to ashes [roderic]

[Juliet]

Relationships were complicated, feelings were too much for some people. There were a lot of excuses that Juliet had already thought about as she had tucked away the necklace that Athena had given her earlier on. Later, she’d go to the boat and do some redecorating. Maybe dark wooden floors with a deep red wall, black sofa... She shook her head briefly. Where did that come from? Her hand raised to rub at the side of her head, hating the differences. She felt trapped to Cassadee’s mindset sometime and she could almost feel the differences bubbling to the surface every time.

“How’d you figure that?” It was a genuine question that she was curious about. Juliet herself didn’t know if she’d ever return, she’d been quite content in her little corner of darkness and misery. The pain she felt was countered there and while it had been a waking nightmare, she could feel the insanity grasping at the edge of it all. Back in this realm, she knew she was different. She knew there were traits that were not her own, habits. She didn’t even like the same type of music, which baffled and annoyed her because she wanted to listen to Classical, but it would eventually shift to some pop annoyance that was overplayed on the radio. “When I was enthralled, I thought only you and Reanna were the only two to think of me.” She admitted, reluctantly. The Russian hadn’t been happy with her. There had been enough words exchanged and currently, Juliet was still being ignored by her. “Nix didn’t recognize me, haven’t seen Saige. Birdy and I were together in the Shadow Realm.”

He was like a little kid, she thought, in the way that he rubbed his cheek and after its done, she scratched at bottom lip lightly with her thumbnail. What was with Cassadee and dry skin? She made a mental note to look up remedies for it later on. If she had the patience, she’d just gank herself and wait until she’d gotten another body. A better one. She wasn’t as graceful as Juliet had been, but she supposed over time that could be fixed. It all would be a matter of progress and pushing herself. A lot of spa days, she noted, were ahead of her and it was a mild reassurance that things could eventually, go back to normal. At some point. “You just have to ruin my optimism.” She offered a smile but then looked over the ash piles. “It doesn’t look like something those bounty hunting freaks do. It’s too organized and I doubt they’d bring someone here to kill them, the lock wasn’t broken either.”

“Wraith. Not ghost thing.” She picked at some of the dust from her fingernails, a frown playing across her lips as she tried not to think about it much. She was still upset that Saige had thought she wouldn’t return. The woman that had enthralled her wasn’t bad to her, but they had their differences. Adelaide had been the first name of the other body that she’d taken over and she didn’t remember dying that time. A rogue vampire, maybe? She didn’t dwell on it as green eyes moved back to Roderic and she motioned lightly towards a broom. “I’d appreciate it, if you aren’t busy.”

[Roderic]

"Because I'm your brother." I tell her with a casual shrug, though there is a glimmer of a grin on my lips, noting the joke in those words. I had seen other people say things like that and have facial expressions like that. I mimic the one expression of a guy I saw talking to some chick at a station one night. They didn't know I was there, the shadows blanketing me as I listened to them yammer on. "People just sometimes need time to sort their **** out. You're too strong to sit around for centuries being a gh-wraith thing." I add in, the cocky smile vanishing and being replaced with a real smile. I don't know it's a cocky smile, it's just what I saw and mirrored because it seemed apt at that moment.

"You're probably right." I nod to the ashes, knowing that she was right, but not hinting that fact. When she talked about Saige, I looked around. Saige had asked me if I thought Jules was coming back and I told her she probably wasn't. Or if she did, it would be a while. I only did it because while I knew Jules would come back, it could be years. And the girl was hanging on to some hope that she would be back in a couple weeks, maybe even months. She couldn't progress to be herself if she was always holding on to something that could take years to come true. It wasn't nice of me, to squish her hopes like that, but with Saige not fixated on Juliet's return, she had gotten close to that one woman that she was going to marry and was happy. I'm not sentimental, but women that were happy weren't spazzing out at others. Others being me.

"Well, we've got a lot of organizing to do. You keeping all your places?" I ask Juliet, realizing now that she probably didn't know that I had my own business now. "I sort of started my own venture. Sorry." I ruffle some of my hair before I get cleaning up again, focusing on all the ash. "I might have something that can help with the blood. At home." I tell her as I point out a small spray of blood that was on a baseboard.

"What should we do after this?" I ask her. I think I should keep her busy so she remembers why she came back and so Juliet wants to stay. I will have to ask Nix if this is the correct approach, or if I should try a different one later.

[Juliet]

Juliet bumped him lightly with her shoulder, chuckling as the relief was evident on her features. She didn't realize how much she'd missed some people while away and to know he hadn't given up thought made it easier on her when it come to wanting to stay. "I'm glad somebody thought that." She said quietly, lifting her hand to scratch at her arm in thought. She could see some of the ash underneath her fingernails and subconsciously shivered before a moment of 'what the hell' went through her mind. She normally wouldn't care about things like that, so why now?

There were a lot of confusing things that she needed to sort out. "Wonder if the cameras picked anything up." She murmured to herself, or what she thought were working cameras sitting in the corner. Juliet couldn't remember if she'd gotten the security system working down there or not and as she crouched down to begin wiping down the lower half of the display she supposed she hadn't.

"I've let Blackadder go for the time being, might reopen something else in the future." When she heard him apologize, she blinked and looked up at him. "Wasn't that your plan anyway?" A smile crossed her lips, genuine and more natural like those she would have given him in the past. "I'm proud of you, Ric, don't apologize. I'll have to stop by sometime. Just know if you ever feel like working here on the sideline, you're always welcome. You've got your keys."

She wasn't going to ask for them back, not after all that he'd done for her. Her gaze followed where he pointed and the smile was placed with a frown. By the way it was more comfortable on her face, Juliet supposed Cassadee wasn't a very happy person and didn't do it often. "Alright, and why do you think whoever did this chose my place of all things?" She shook her head. Looking at the cloth in hand, Juliet wasn't happy with the way the ash turned it black, but she was relieved that she could just buy more.

"I don't know, open a bag of blood and relax? You could catch me up everything that I've missed. I've been reading the board, but there's usually a missing piece of a puzzle if you don't see it in the whole fashion." She paused, frowning as her light green eyes went to Roderic. "I saw Athena changed her name."

[Roderic]

She mentions the cameras and while I knew they existed, I planned on erasing the evidence at some point. I had at first. I erased it every night but then went to every other, then once a week. I didn't erase the last two weeks worth of evidence that told her exactly what went down here. I shrug my shoulders. "Systems don't run forever." I say. It's the truth. I'm not sure it's even working anymore because I've not touched it for a little over two weeks.

She talks about working for her on the side. I wouldn't mind. I liked our routine for a while. I liked my time with Juliet. I was comfortable around her. She didn't push boundaries. Not much anyways. "Yeah, I guess it was." I say with a nod. Juliet also says she's proud of me and I swallow. Hard. "I made all this ash." I say before I stop it from coming out. "I'm not supposed to tell anyone. Nix said so." I stop cleaning and look at her. "I killed all these people. Vampires." I clarify. "I did it here because it was safe. And unoccupied." I run a hand through my hair and then ruffle it upwards. "I did it because it kept my secret safe. About drinking blood. Vampire blood."

I look at her from across the room, giving her time to process what I had just said and to wait for a variety of reactions. For her to back away. For her to lecture or scold me on my choice of lifestyle or to just plain look disappointed. I didn't want to disappoint Juliet, not after she had said she was proud of me. The thought was a hard one to swallow down. I don't say anything about Altaire specifically yet, or anyone in it. I think we have some catching up to do on this first.

[Juliet]

“I’ll hack it later and find out.” A shrug of her shoulders said as much, looking at him over her shoulder briefly before turning her attention back to the task at hand. Even if she was a bit of a neat freak, she didn’t look forward to it and because it was ash, she wasn’t going to ask any of her human employees to do help. At least, though, that Roderic was there.

When he swallowed, however, and admitted that he made the ash, Juliet stopped what she was doing and dropped the rag in her hand as she straightened up and stared at him. For the most part, he’d really been the only person to see any aggression in the past out of her aside from Saige... As he was being honest, she tried to think about what he was telling her.

He had killed vampires in her shop and left the remains there. She was briefly annoyed at him because of the mess. Afraid, because he admitted to drinking vampire blood as a vampire. “Isn’t that supposed to be toxic?” A voice inside her head asked, to which she ignored because she was sure if she answered herself out loud like she normally would have, Roderic would have probably been confused.

Even in Cassadee’s body, her new body, it was still obvious that Juliet couldn’t keep her feelings from her features. Her expressions shifted from confusion to confliction, annoyance to slightly disgusted. But, this was Roderic. She had always known he was a bit... different, and she loved him for it. He had been there for her when others hadn’t been, coaxed her out of the office just to get her to stop moping about because of Athena. It took her a total of ten minutes to decide on torn as her reaction.

“At least you’re careful? However, I do hope we didn’t know any of these vampires, Ric.” She frowned, staying where she stood to show that she wasn’t going to back away because of his choice, “And if you ever need a willing donor rather than,” She motioned at the ash, “Ask me and you can take some of mine.” In truth, she probably considered the man to be one, if not her actual, best friend.

Juliet lifted her hand to rub at her face, thinking about it as she mindlessly hummed It’s A Small World just as she would to annoy Anansi before offering a small, shy smile to her sibling. “Well. You clearly got the hang of using that knife of yours, too, as I recall it getting stuck in my thigh when I killed you.” She said playfully, trying to show that yes, she was a little disgusted, but things hadn’t changed. There was no disappointment.

[Roderic]

"I'd never feed off an Altaire," I interject in a flat tone, as I continue in the same tone. What I said and will say is a fact, there is no need to lace it with any form of emotion. "Unless I have permission. And even then-" I shrug. I probably wouldn't feed off too many of them either, even with permission. And I don't know a lot of vampires, so the chances of me killing someone I know, or someone's friend that I happen to know, is sort of slim. And I honestly don't give a ****. Everyone I've dusted has either wanted to give me their blood for some quick cash, or was abandoned to this way of life. I've watched them, even studied them before I've made my move.

I stare at her as she offers up herself and then I nod. "Thanks." I don't say if I will take her up on her offer. I also don't decline it either. It was just something I would think about. Supposedly people still frowned on this 'life-style,' so I try not to involve too many others. It's safer that way.

"So now what? After this? After we clean?" I ask Juliet. I'm interested for a couple reasons. She doesn't look like Juliet, but she sounds like her. A little. How much had the umbra changed her? Or is she still the same woman who was so in love with Athena? So in love with her, that the woman couldn't even live anymore. I don't understand that concept, but I wasn't a woman either. The more time I spend around them, the more I recognize how different they are to men. How connected they are to their emotions. Which wasn't always rational. Far from, really.

"You could say I've gotten a little better, or people have gotten a little lazier." I reply to her inside joke before moving to grab a broom so I could sweep the room. "You still in to photography?" I ask her, trying to get a feel for Juliet after her return.

[Juliet]

Juliet wasn’t too concerned about knowing anyone, really. In reality, she didn’t think she knew that many people aside from those she came into contact with at work even before her death. But she had been briefly concerned that some of the ashes had belonged to Jamie. She didn’t think Roderic would have hurt her, truthfully, even though she was very much aware that the man didn’t like her much. Or at least he hadn’t because of how hurt she herself had been because of her fiancée’s disappearance.

“Isn’t it poisonous?” She found herself asking the question that had echoed in her mind. After Phoenix, or Nixy as Juliet referred to her as, turned her, she no longer bit down on her bottom lip because of the bad habit of splitting the skin with her teeth when she was under pressure. The first time she’d done it, the taste had been enough for her not to want to do it again.

She wiped her hands on the seat of her sweatpants, not particularly caring at the ashen handprints left behind before she considered the question. “Probably go back to work.” It was automatic without thought and something she really did enjoy doing. She’d always been a bit of a workaholic, but the Athena stuff had pushed it quite a bit overboard. Or, maybe a lot overboard. It would depend on who was being asked. However, as Juliet realized what she had said, it dawned on her that Roderic had come to see her without asking any questions. Actually, he had been one of the few that didn’t demand an answer about where she’d gone. She immediately felt bad. “Or maybe we can get cleaned up and go for a walk? Catch up?”

She was okay. She missed Athena, Jamie. Whatever she called herself, but at the same time, she wasn’t going to kill herself again over the other woman. Aldric was gone, there was no dealing with him, either. She continued cleaning as he replied and chuckled. “Yep, didn’t matter if I’m dead or alive. I will always love photography. I still have the Polaroid you gave me, too. It’s up in my desk.”

[Roderic]

"I don't know. Maybe?" I shrug my shoulders. "I've never met another one who takes part in my...dietary habits." I tell her truthfully. "I guess we'll find out first hand." I rest a hand on the back of my neck before rubbing it. I have heard the rumors about it, but so far, it's just that. Rumors. I wouldn't go around advising everyone to do it, but so far I seem to be alright. I don't feel any different. Then again, I don't feel a lot of things.

She wanted to 'catch up.' I don't think I have much to catch up on. Not much has changed in my life and the things that have, well, they are personal. I like to keep my life private. I know I can trust Jules not to blab her mouth (I've come to realize that she's perhaps the one of a few females that are not irrational in the city), but still. "Okay." I say. I could talk about anything Altaire with her, because she was an Altaire and because she should know what has been going on. If she wanted to.

I look at the desk when she says the polaroid camera is still in her possession and where its been this whole time. I then look back at her and give her a sideways grin. "Cool." I say before depositing of some ash in a trash bin. I look around the room, and note that we'll need to mop at some point. But for now, it's pretty clean. "I like to walk." I say. I actually like to run more, but as long as I'm moving around doing something, it doesn't actually matter. "Unless you wanted to rent a disney movie." I wasn't all that serious about the last statement, but from memory, a few Altaire women had a thing about those types of movies. But, if that's what she wanted to do on her first night(s) back, then I could pretend I was watching it.

[Juliet]

“The most I know about it is that it’s taboo... but, considering you used to do it as a human, too, I don’t really think that it should be all that shocking.” She frowned in thought, watching her sibling in concern. She knew people didn’t like it, that they were killed for it and she’d already seen him die once – of course, it was at her hand and it had been for him to go get Phoenix. After being in the shadow realm for so long herself, however, she really didn’t want to see anyone else in her family go. “Just be careful, please?”

The words are automatic, she knows Roderic’s not someone to purposely draw attention to himself, but they were said to show that she did care about him. Scratching briefly at Cassadee’s arm, she thought, “This chick really needed moisturizing lessons” and then fell quiet for some time as she tried to think of the differences between then and now. Depression was gone – but loneliness had replaced it, her body was different – to a point that it irritated her regularly when her old clothes fit awkwardly, and her old friends, minus the Altaire family, thought she was dead. Grinning lightly in response to the sideways grin, Juliet nodded and then straightened up after a little while. She pushed her hands against her back as she stretched out, listening to him talk.

“I think a walk would be nice, it’s decent out. I just need to change.” She looked down at the ash covered sweats and made a mental note to pick up more laundry soap as she made her way back to her office and out of sight. She put back on her dress as she heard him mention the idea of renting a Disney movie and poked her head out to give him a weird look. “Since when do you like Disney movies?” She asked, and then went back to changing before walking out. She brought a pair of flats with her, pulling her hair over her shoulder.

[Roderic]

She says it's taboo and I just shrug my shoulders. Says who, exactly? I always wonder who makes the rules for our 'society.' I have heard of the elders, but haven't really seen any of them around. Or if they are around, they really aren't talking anymore. Which might be better for everyone. Progression and all that. What might have been taboo hundreds of years ago, might not be anymore. It's the way things worked in the human spectrum of things, so why not with vampires? "I'll be fine." I assure her, but add on, "And careful." Just for her sake. Women.

I watch her until she disappears, then do a quick double take of the room. I move over to the cash register, which I assume is empty because the store had been closed for months and move it to the left a little. Then the right and left again. It finally looked 'even,' but I touched the register again because I had to. I needed to.

Jules comes back and she comments about my suggestion. I crack a smile and shake my head. "I'm not, but I remember a few of you were." By a few of you, I meant a few altaires. The women mostly. "I was secretly hoping you wouldn't pick the movie." I confess as I push open the door to the store and let her go through first. "So what do you want to know first? You have to have more questions about the things you've seen and heard. Or more about the things I've talked about. I'll give you the short version of whatever you want to know so you're not out of the loop." I let the door close after me, lock it up and start towards the escalator.