Path of the Vampire forum

Posted: **21 Jan 2012, 18:23**

I HEARD THEM AGAIN TONIGHT. THE LITTLE GIRLS THAT VISIT ME IN MY DREAMS. THEY ARE ALWAYS GIGGLING AND LAUGHING BETWEEN THEMSELVES AS IF THEY HAVE NOT A CARE IN THE WORLD. THEY SOUND YOUNG SO I WOULD SUPPOSE THEY TRULY DO NOT HAVE A CARE. SHOULD THAT NOT MAKE THE SOUND OF THEIR MIRTH SOMETHING MELODIOUS? ENCHANTING? IT IS NOT. EACH LAUGH LEAVES ME FEELING AS IF DEATH IS WHISPERING ALONG MY FLESH. IT IS A STRANGE COMPARISON SINCE I AM UNABLE TO DIE AS NORMAL BEINGS DO. HOWEVER IT IS WHAT COMES TO MIND WHEN THAT SICKLY CHILL SETTLES UPON MY SKIN. STILL I CANNOT HELP BEING COMPELLED TO REMAIN IN THEIR LITTLE WORLD OF HAZE LETTING THEIR SQUEALS OF DELIGHT GRIP AND JERK AT MY STOMACH. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND IT…BUT I WANT TO. IT IS THIS CURIOSITY THAT HAS PROMPTED ME TO KEEP A JOURNAL THOUGH IT IS RARE THAT I AM ABLE TO WAKE WITH THE MEMORY OF WHAT HAS HAPPENED DURING THEIR PRESENCE BEYOND SENSATION.

PERHAPS IT IS THE RESIDUAL EFFECTS OF ‘INSPIRATION’. I DO NOT QUITE UNDERSTAND WHY BUT THERE WAS AN ALLURIST WITHIN THE HUNTING GROUNDS THAT CHOSE TO USE THE ABILITY ON ME. IT HAS QUITE THE INTERSTING EFFECT.

NEVERTHELESS I HAVE CONSIDERED SPEAKING TO AZRAETH ABOUT IT AS WELL THOUGH I AM NOT SURE OF HIS QUALIFICATIONS CONCERNING POSSIBLE HALLUCINATIONS OR IF I HAVE ENOUGH DATA TO OFFER TO BE OF ANY USE. I DO NOT KNOW WHAT THE LITTLE GIRLS LOOK LIKE NOT EVEN WHAT HAS HAD THIS SO AMUSED THIS ENTIRE TIME.

HOPEFULLY SOME CLARITY WILL BE OFFERED IN THE NEAR FUTURE.

-END LOG-

I AM COVERED IN BLOOD. I AM NOT SURE HOW OR WHEN BUT AT SOME POINT I LEFT MY RESTING SPOT TO...I DO NOT KNOW. I DID NOT FEED. I STILL FEEL THE DRY PRICKLE OF THIRST AT THE BACK OF MY THROAT YET I AM COVERED IN BLOOD. THE VICTIM IS FEMALE. HER ID STATES THAT SHE IS WILL INTO HER THIRTIES. BLUE EYES. CURLY BRUNETTE HAIR. SHE IS OF A SLIGHT BUILD. JUDGING BY HER FLESH SHE WAS PALE BEFORE HER DEATH. SHE DOES NOT LOOK LIKE ANYONE I HAVE KNOWN IN THE PAST OR PRESENCE. STILL THERE IS A SENSE OF SATISFACTION AND GUILT IN SEEING HER FACE MUTILATED BEYOND RECOGNITION HER INNARDS SPRAWLED OUT AROUND HER. HER BLOOD IS STAGNANT AND OLD BY NOW. SLIGHTLY BITTER. I DOUBT THESE DETAILS WILL AIDE IN ANYTHING HOWEVER THEY ARE THERE EITHER AS NOTES IF NOTHING ELSE. I WILL BE CLEANING THE MESS ONCE THIS LOG IS ENDED THOUGH I COULD VERY WELL LEAVE HER REMAINS TO ROT FOR THE NEXT TWO WEEKS. AZRAETH HAS INFORMED ME THAT THE HUMANS IN THIS LOCATION ARE AT OUR DISPOSAL. HIS ABILITY TO KEEP THEM ENTRANCED AND RETAIN THE ENERGY NEEDED TO KEEP THEM ENTRANCED IS FASCINATING THOUGH HARD TO GROW ACCUSTOMED TO.

THERE WERE NO LITTLE GIRLS LAST NIGHT. NO LAUGHTER. NO GIGGLING. EVEN SO I FEEL THAT I AM FORGETTING SEVERAL IMPORTANT DETAILS. AS ALWAYS THOSE DETAILS ARE JUST BEYOND MY RECALLING THEM COMPLETELY. THERE ARE VAGUE FLASHES OF WHITE ACCOMPANIED WITH A CHILL. IT IS NOT THE SAME CHILL THAT COMES WITH THE CHILDREN'S LAUGHTER. THIS CHILL FEELS LIKE WINTER. IT IS CRISP AND REFRESHING. SNOW PERHAPS? THERE IS NO SCENT TO GO WITH THE SENSATION BEYOND THE SLAUGHTERHOUSE SMELL THAT IS MORE LIKELY FROM THE CORPSE AT MY FEET. STILL TO SAY THAT IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE VAGUE DETAILS DOES NOT FEEL ACCURATE.

I WILL GIVE IT MORE TIME. PERHAPS THERE WILL BE MORE TO ADD AFTER I HAVE CLEANED AND RETURNED TO HARPER ROCK FOR SUPPLIES.

-END LOG-

Posted: **21 Jan 2012, 18:53**

Flakes of blackened paper turned to ash fluttered and crimped from between the pages they were positioned between. What was left of the letters written on aged paper that smelled of smoke and stagnant air rested in between the individual pages of the journal.

Posted: **21 Jan 2012, 18:54**

Posted: **21 Jan 2012, 18:54**

Posted: **21 Jan 2012, 18:55**

Posted: **21 Jan 2012, 18:55**

Posted: **30 Jan 2012, 18:45**

MANY THINGS HAVE HAPPENED THOUGH IT HAS NOT BEEN THAT LONG SINCE I HAVE WRITTEN IN THIS JOURNAL. I WILL DO MY BEST TO RECOUNT EACH HAPPENING SINCE MY LAST LOG.

THE FIRST IS A CHILDE. I NOW HAVE TWO THOUGH I WILL SPEAK OF THE SECOND LATER. THE FIRST IS MALE, ROMANIAN, ALLURIST. HIS NAME IS STEFAN AND HE IS DEAF. THOUGH IT IS OUT OF MY SCOPE TO TEACH MUCH LESS COMMUNICATE WITH THE IMPAIRED HE IS THRIVING IN HIS NEW LIFE. HE HAS A DETERMINATION THAT I AM BEGINNING TO APPRECIATE AS THE DAYS GO ON. AZRAETH WILL BE ASSISTING IN TEACHING HIM SIGN LANGUAGE. I HAVE CONSIDERED TEACHING HIM MORSE CODE AS WELL.

THE SECOND EVENT IS THE BOUTS OF INSOMNIA. EVEN WITH THE AIDE OF MEDICATION, I AM NOT ABLE TO SLEEP. THERE ARE NO THOUGHTS TO KEEP ME AWAKE DURING THE DAY. I AM BORED MOST TIMES AS I WATCH THE SUN FILL THE STREETS THEN EMPTY FROM THEM. I HAVE STEPPED OUT TO GREET ON MORE THAN ONE OCCASION. THE ABILITY TO DAY WALK IS EXHILARATING THOUGH I DO NOT GO UNSCATHED. THE BLOOD NEAR THE SURFACE OF MY SKIN EVAPORATES ALMOST INSTANTLY LEAVING ME IN NEED OF FEEDING ONCE MORE. I HAVE PREOCCUPIED MYSELF WITH THIS POINTLESS CYCLE UNTIL I TIRED OF IT THEN I BEGAN TO INDULGE IN MY ACQUIRED HABITS. THOUGH AZRAETH DOES NOT SEEM TO MIND I HAVE KEPT TO SEPARATE HOTEL ROOM. I DO NOT FEAR HIS JUDGEMENT. I SIMPLY PREFER TO BE ALONE UNTIL I HAVE SETTLED FULLY INTO THE HIGH.

THREE DAYS PASSED BEFORE THE INSOMNIA BEGAN TO WANE. THEN I WAS UNABLE TO KEEP MY EYES OPEN AT ALL. I SLEPT AND WOKE IN THE SAME SPOT FOR FOUR DAYS. ON THE FIFTH THE CHILDREN CAME BACK.

I DO NOT KNOW WHY BUT I FELT AS IF I MISSED THEM DURING THEIR ABSENCE. THEIR GIGGLING AND SQUEALS STILL LINGERED AS I GAINED CONSCIOUSNESS WHILE THEIR FACES STILL ELUDE ME AS WELL AS THEIR LITTLE GAMES. NEVERTHELESS WITH THEIR LAUGHTER CAME BLOOD AND A NEW VICTIM. HER NAME IS NASTUNYE. SHE IS MY AGE, BLONDE AND FROM THE UKRAINE. MYSTIC. SHE IS HOW HANNAH WOULD LOOK IF SHE WERE STILL HERE.

I DO NOT REMEMBER ATTACKING HER NOR DO I REMEMBER GIVING HER THE BLOOD NEEDED TO SURVIVE SUCH AN ATTACK. NEVERTHELESS I HAVE A SECOND CHILDE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR. THOUGH IT IS UNEXPECTED I DO NOT MIND IT.

-END LOG-

Posted: **07 Feb 2012, 17:00**

I HAVE KILLED AN OFFICER TODAY IN FRONT OF ANOTHER. I DO NOT KNOW WHAT COMPELLED ME TO DO SO. YES THEY HAD OPEN FIRE AND MANAGED TO HIT ME BUT I AM ABLE TO WALK AWAY ON NORMAL OCCASION. TODAY WAS DIFFERENT. I TORE INTO THE FIRST ONE BEFORE THE BULLET PUT INTO MY STOMACH AND LEG COULD STOP BURNING. THE PAIN WAS NOT BAD. I HAVE GROWN USED TO IT BY NOW. NEVERTHELESS IT ANGERED ME QUICKLY. BEFORE I COULD GAIN CONTROL OF MYSELF I WAS COVERED IN BLOOD WITH THE OFFICER AT MY FEET. I DO NOT KNOW WHERE THEY OTHER ONE WENT. I DID NOT BOTHER TO CHECK.

I SUPPOSE I SHOULD TELL AZRAETH WHENEVER HE RETURNS. HE WAS CAUGHT OUTSIDE DURING THE SUNRISE. I WAS TOO LATE TO HELP HIM. EVEN CELERITY DID NOT GET ME THERE IN TIME. I HAD FORGOTTEN JUST HOW VIOLENT THE BURNING CAN BE FOR THOSE WHO CANNOT DAY WALK. NOW I AM HAUNTED WITH THE MEMORY OF IT AND THE SMELL OF BURNING FLESH. I KNOW THAT HE WILL BE BACK BUT I CANNOT HELP TO FEEL AS IF I HAVE FAILED HIM SOMEHOW.

I WILL HAVE TO RETURN TO HARPER ROCK WITHOUT HIM. IT IS AWKWARD BUT HAS TO BE DONE. VIVEKA WILL NEED TO KNOW WHERE AND HOW TO HUNT HUMANS WHO ARE OF SOUND MIND WHILE SHE BUILDS HER STRENGTH.

-END LOG-

Posted: **19 Feb 2012, 16:11**

THERE IS A HOLE IN MY HEAD. ONE OF THE.....
I LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT.

I NEED TO FIND THE WRAITH FOR THE NECROMANCER PATH. HER NAME STARTS WITH R.
RABBIT, RHINO, RUPERT...
I WANT A CAT NAMED RUPERT. THEN I WILL STUFF IT.

THERE IS A HOLE IN MY HEAD.

-END LOG-

Posted: **26 Apr 2012, 21:20**

I HAVE DIED SINCE MY LAST LOG. THE SHADOW REALM IS A COLD PLACE YET THE LACK OF EMOTION, MORALE AND ORDER APPEALED TO ME FOR A SHORT TIME. DAY AND NIGHT DIDN'T MATTER NOR DID TIME. I WAS AND I WAS NOT. JUST AS I AM NOW BUT THERE WERE NO CHEMICALS TO INDUCE IT. I SAW A FLEETING GLIMPSE OF AZRAETH WHILE I WAS THERE. I ATTACKED HIM AND DRAINED HIM OF WHAT I NEEDED. I HOLD NO REMORSE FOR IT. HE LEFT. HE JUST.....LEFT. I GIVE UP HOPE THAT HE WILL RETURN BUT NEVER COMPLETELY. HIS ABSENCE DOES NOT HEAL OVER LIKE THOSE OF RELATIVES LOST. I TURN TO TALK TO HIM SOME DAYS ONLY TO FIND HE IS NOT THERE. EACH TIME, EACH REALIZATION LEAVES MY CHEST ACHING AND MY EARS RINGING. AS A RESULT I HAVE TRIED TO ISOLATE MYSELF. UNFORTUNATELY, MY ROOM AT THE DRAGOMIR TEMPLE IS TOO QUIET AND I HAVE NO WANT TO PURCHASE A PROPER APARTMENT. I SPEND MY SUNRISES IN THE WAREHOUSES AMONG THE HOMELESS AND LISTEN TO THEIR STORIES OF BETTER TIMES. WHEN I GROW BORED I SILENCE THEM TO MULL OVER THAT THAT IS MY LIFE NOW. I HAVE NO TIES, NO OBLIGATED LOYALTIES THAT I FEEL I SHOULD MAINTAIN BEYOND MY CHILDER. ESSENTIALLY I AM FREE TO DO AS I WISH HOWEVER I WISH AND THAT LEAVES ME EMPTY AS WELL.

I AM A KILLER.
I AM A SOLDIER.
I HAVE NO PURPOSE.
I HAVE NO ORDERS.

IT IS TIME THAT I FIND ONE BEYOND THE SYRINGE AWAITING ME.

-END LOG-

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