<Ainsley> It was like every other night before tonight. Only, it wasn’t. What started out typical and mundane; spaghetti for dinner, with breadsticks and some fresh green beans from the market down the block, turned into a wave of confusion. Spaghetti that should have been eaten remained on the plate on the table near the couch. Ainsley almost always ate her dinner on the couch these nights because by the time she got home from work, her feet were as swollen as her belly, if not more. Maybe an over dramatization in her mind, but it certainly felt like it.
The cup of water had tumbled off the side table and now pooled on the hardwood floor, as Ainsley staggered to her phone. One step at a time seemed almost impossible, as pain riddled her body, from her lower back, to her side and then her gut. Every couple of steps she stopped as a sharp pain seared through her, and even cried out as she tried to focus on her breathing. That was what was important, wasn’t it? Never mind how wrong this felt. Deep, long breath in, then quick, short ones out as she wobbled to the table and extended her arm out to the table where her phone was at. Her shaky hands grabbed at it as another stabbing pain rippled through her, the phone sliding forward because she overshot her reach. Ainsley moaned out as her hands locked down on the table to brace her weight, afraid her knees might buckle from the pain she was enduring. More breaths. It would make her feel better. It had to.
The phone was finally reached and she shakily scrolled through her very short contact list. When his name came up, she pressed down firmly on his name and listened to the phone ring. She didn’t wait for him to finish saying hello, before Ainsley interjected. “It’s time. Hurry!” Ainsley lowered her body to the firm wooden chair as she hunched over, her head not far from her enlarged stomach as Ainsley focused on her breaths and waited for him to arrive and help her with everything they had been practicing for these last few months.
<Bohan> The balcony door of the apartment was open. The small space was compact but not enough that his 16 x 20 canvas perched on the easel didn’t fit where he managed to put it. The recycled barstool that was sporting a swivel option had him comfortably balancing while his brush was offered a second dip and swirl in the glass Kerr jar beside him. The clouds of colors flowed with the water and soon a new mood could be discovered with the liquid. A dirty blue evolved that Picasso could have appreciated. Unfortunately it did little for Bohan except remind him that given his current work at hand the water needed to be changed out.
He slid his foot from the metal bar beneath that served as a footrest. He stood with the glass in hand as if it already contained the import he could go for later when he called it a night.He had two more hours ahead of him before that could happen. Even artists had to abide to the moving hands of a clock. The water ran from the faucet into the half gallon size glass. The chirp of his cell phone pulled him away from the industrial influenced island kitchen sink. Cold polished cement beneath his bare feet as they stepped inspired each to slide into the sandals that waited at the edge of the black area rug. He caught the number coming in and immediately snapped up the phone while heading back to the sink to shut off the water.
“Hell…” he was cut off before he could get out her name much less hello. “Ains…”
The call ended with the blink of the glow against his cheek then the tell tale fade to black. He felt the lift of his insides just as if he was on that ejection seat she had him in after losing a bet over a game of poker a couple years back. She always got lucky the more that she drank and he...well not so much. He felt the rush of what was entirely out of his control and once again he was along for the ride he would never have the power of stopping. This time was different. He wouldn’t be left with the nachos or the cheap beer on his lap when it was over. This time he would be holding what he had waited nearly nine months to see.
He kicked off the sandals and replaced them with leather shoes that had tags claiming they were made in Italy. The small leather hair tie was plucked from the table by the door. The man bun of the century went into effect because he was told during the Lamaze classes it would have to be if he ever wanted to see the inside of the delivery room. The door locked tight and on his way he was taking the anticipation that filled him feet to head. This was is. Tonight he was going to meet the best thing that ever happened to him next to the woman carrying the life soon to arrive to the world.
The Little Prince-Bohan
-
Bohan
- Registered User
- Posts: 17
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:15
- CrowNet Handle: Picasso's Padawan
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Ainsley> Ainsley had to stand. She told herself this, three times before she once again found her feet supporting her weight.her wobbled pace throughout the two bedroom apartment. There were things she had to get. He could get them, but what if it was too late? She needed her hospital bag. It had her clothes and his when the time came for them to all go home. Ainsley had packed it almost a month ago, in anticipation of her ‘little prince’ that had been scheduled to arrive in two days from now. It seemed that while he was eager for an early start in the world, Ainsley might have been a little more eager. She was past his room, the room that would be his when they arrived from the hospital in a night, or maybe two.
Her shoulder found the wall that was between her room and his; his name still to be decided. Ainsley believed she would know which or the two would be perfect for him when she saw his face for the first time in the delivery room. Ainsley bit down on her lower lip as both hands went to her back and she pushed the palms against it. The pain in her back was unbearable, which meant that this wasn’t going to be some normal delivery; as normal as those things could be. It meant she was in for a world of hurt and the sooner he came out, the better.
She tasted blood on her lips as Ainsley licked at her lower lip, then kept with the breathing. One long in, three, or four short ones out. When she made it to her bedroom door, she clung to the frame and let out a short, happy sob before her hand came under her nose to wipe at the sweat that was collecting there. Her startling blue eyes fell on the bag that was in the rocking chair she was gifted by her sister; the same chair that had been used by her parents for her, her brother and sister. The chair her sister had used for her own son when he was young enough to enjoy being rocked to sleep. She had made it to the edge of her bed before Ainsley decided that she couldn’t do this alone anymore and Bohan would have to help her the rest of the way.
<Bohan> Dropping the keys was the last thing he needed to do but he did. A quick reach for them had them scooped up and in the palm of his hand. He would just have to hold onto them. They would be needed soon enough. A fumble of the miscellaneous jagged metal pieces on the ring had them in his pocket as soon as he turned the handle of her apartment door. Once he was inside he spotted her and brushed past her to take hold of the bag he was all too familiar with. They packed it several months ago after the class where they were assigned to go home and prepare for being ready for this very trip whenever the time finally arrived. He had the least amount of items within it. All he cared about was making sure she had anything she wanted stuffed inside.
“You breathing like you are supposed to?” He curled his hand at the back of her neck and leaned over and down and gave the top of her head a passing kiss. The chair that had brought comfort to many was not ignored. “Just think soon you will be back with your arms full rocking a new generation in that chair.”
He was about to step back towards the door and hold it open but he realized this wasn’t the same as picking her up for another ultrasound or OB visit. This was it. The straps of massive tote was over his shoulder as if he carried one routinely. A gentle smile he was known for when he wanted to lift someone’s spirits appeared. He couldn’t imagine the pain she was going to endure. He had seen enough videos to give him a hint or two. He read everything he could get his hands on hoping that would be of use. He even practiced the various stages of breathing techniques until he nearly passed out. And as he stood there he couldn’t help but admire her for the fact she was going to take whatever comes and allow him the honor of being there while she did.
“I think I got it from here.” He stepped in close to her taking care to be mindful where he placed his hands on her. The last thing he ever wanted to do was increase the discomfort she was naturally experiencing. “Let me know if you need me to stop or set you down at any point.”
That was all the further warning she would get. Even with the baby on board she was significantly lighter than any weight he routinely lifted. In a long stride that was not open to wasting any time he got her out of the door, secured the apartment and into the car. Bag in back and his body sliding into the driver seat left him the task of getting the vehicle moving towards the hospital. While pulling out into the road he reached over and took her hand in his. With a gentle squeeze he reminded her she was not going to be alone.
Her shoulder found the wall that was between her room and his; his name still to be decided. Ainsley believed she would know which or the two would be perfect for him when she saw his face for the first time in the delivery room. Ainsley bit down on her lower lip as both hands went to her back and she pushed the palms against it. The pain in her back was unbearable, which meant that this wasn’t going to be some normal delivery; as normal as those things could be. It meant she was in for a world of hurt and the sooner he came out, the better.
She tasted blood on her lips as Ainsley licked at her lower lip, then kept with the breathing. One long in, three, or four short ones out. When she made it to her bedroom door, she clung to the frame and let out a short, happy sob before her hand came under her nose to wipe at the sweat that was collecting there. Her startling blue eyes fell on the bag that was in the rocking chair she was gifted by her sister; the same chair that had been used by her parents for her, her brother and sister. The chair her sister had used for her own son when he was young enough to enjoy being rocked to sleep. She had made it to the edge of her bed before Ainsley decided that she couldn’t do this alone anymore and Bohan would have to help her the rest of the way.
<Bohan> Dropping the keys was the last thing he needed to do but he did. A quick reach for them had them scooped up and in the palm of his hand. He would just have to hold onto them. They would be needed soon enough. A fumble of the miscellaneous jagged metal pieces on the ring had them in his pocket as soon as he turned the handle of her apartment door. Once he was inside he spotted her and brushed past her to take hold of the bag he was all too familiar with. They packed it several months ago after the class where they were assigned to go home and prepare for being ready for this very trip whenever the time finally arrived. He had the least amount of items within it. All he cared about was making sure she had anything she wanted stuffed inside.
“You breathing like you are supposed to?” He curled his hand at the back of her neck and leaned over and down and gave the top of her head a passing kiss. The chair that had brought comfort to many was not ignored. “Just think soon you will be back with your arms full rocking a new generation in that chair.”
He was about to step back towards the door and hold it open but he realized this wasn’t the same as picking her up for another ultrasound or OB visit. This was it. The straps of massive tote was over his shoulder as if he carried one routinely. A gentle smile he was known for when he wanted to lift someone’s spirits appeared. He couldn’t imagine the pain she was going to endure. He had seen enough videos to give him a hint or two. He read everything he could get his hands on hoping that would be of use. He even practiced the various stages of breathing techniques until he nearly passed out. And as he stood there he couldn’t help but admire her for the fact she was going to take whatever comes and allow him the honor of being there while she did.
“I think I got it from here.” He stepped in close to her taking care to be mindful where he placed his hands on her. The last thing he ever wanted to do was increase the discomfort she was naturally experiencing. “Let me know if you need me to stop or set you down at any point.”
That was all the further warning she would get. Even with the baby on board she was significantly lighter than any weight he routinely lifted. In a long stride that was not open to wasting any time he got her out of the door, secured the apartment and into the car. Bag in back and his body sliding into the driver seat left him the task of getting the vehicle moving towards the hospital. While pulling out into the road he reached over and took her hand in his. With a gentle squeeze he reminded her she was not going to be alone.
-
Ainsley (DELETED 8973)
- Posts: 36
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:16
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Ainsley> Bohan was here before Ainsley knew it, or maybe the pain had consumed her so much that she could only focus on only that and not any amount of time that passed. Even with the alarm clock not far from her bed. He made his way inside with the use of a spare key, like he did most other times. While they didn’t live together, Ainsley had absolutely no concerns with him having a key to her apartment. She had one for his too. The two just had that sort of relationship.
“Bohan.” Ainsley sighed out as she saw him spring to life and finish collecting the bag she couldn’t get. Ainsley nodded her head, breathing just as they had practiced together during the classes. If Ainsley wasn’t in so much pain, she would have laughed at the first memory of them in the class. She hadn’t done so well with the breathing thing, so to show her how it was done, because he was a slightly quicker study than she was, he pressed his forehead to hers and had them breath together for a couple rounds. Bohan would be a great dad, Ainsley had no doubt in that.
She looked at him when he said he had things under control, then laughed between her breathing, coughing a little from the surprise of being picked up. She wasn’t a tall woman, or very heavy, but it still surprised her. They were out of the apartment without a word from her, safe in his arms. Ainsley believed that he did have it from here. Nothing would stop them from getting to the hospital. She remembered when she told him she was pregnant, how ready he was to help. To step up where and when it was needed.
While he came around the car, she pressed the buckle inside the latch and when she heard the satisfying ‘click’, her hands went to rest on her enlarged belly. “Please don’t come out yet.” She whispered, almost praying. Giving birth in Bohan’s car was not on her bucket list, or top ten things to do. Ainsley scooted up taller in the passenger seat, hoping to stop the back pain that shocked her to the core. Was he sitting on a nerve or something? The thought diminished when Ainsley realized something she hadn’t before. Or maybe she hadn’t because it only just happened. “My water..” Ainsley said as she looked over at Bohan. “It broke.” Maybe she wouldn’t have a choice in where she gave birth after all.
<Bohan> Water. It broke. Those alerts registered and Bohan’s hand was empty before he knew it. His eyes darted to the seat belt over her belly as she started rising off the seat like she was going somewhere. Thankfully they were at an intersection that was held up by a red light. He reached over and hit the passenger release for the half of the bench seat she was sitting on. It reclined as his other hand landed in the warm slick proof that she was fully committed to delivering. His damp hand lifted and he wiped it off on the denim covering his thigh. The 1978 International Scout II had seen worse sinking into its upholstery and he wasn’t going to sweat the flooding going on beneath her.
“You doing okay?” The light signaled for their lane to start moving and he managed to while reaching over and brushing the side of her face with his hand for contact and reassurance. “We are almost there, Ains.” His foot pressed harder on the gas pedal and he started passing cars when he could.
Bohan opened the glove box and pulled out the envelope inside. He tucked it into the bag once he pulled it in the front seat between them. It wasn’t the time to reveal the contents but the letter inside was given to him to share with her when the baby arrived. He pulled the bag closer to his side as he glanced over at her to see how she was doing. He wondered if she had given names anymore thought. It was more than an attempt at distraction from what hardly could be ignored. He hoped she narrowed down their combined list of twenty to at least ten.
“Any picks on names yet?” The sound of a set of tires skidding caught his attention and he swerved just in time to miss someone who was trying to cut him off. “Idiots are out. Hold on.” He wasn’t about to let the rest of the world get in the way of his own blood arriving to the world. The battered and worn International picked up speed and took ownership of the last stretch of road leading to the hospital emergency entrance.
<Ainsley> Amniotic fluid on her and the car seat. Probably on the floor too. This wasn’t the image that had been in her head the past few months as she crept up on the big day. Ainsley didn’t actually know what it would be like, but none of these ideas came to her mind when they talked about the big day, or prepared for it. And now, there was amniotic fluid on him too. It was probably bound to happen sooner or later, but again, nothing she had thought of until it actually happened.
Her seat reclined and she was thankful for it. A new position meant that maybe the back pain would stop, and she showed it in a weak smile as her head rolled to her left side. “I’m okay. We’re both okay.” She reassured him with a gentle caress to her belly. When he asked about names, Ainsley pressed her upper teeth to her lower lip and thought about it. “I have it down to two.” She said before looking at what was going on around them. She trusted him, but she didn’t trust anyone outside the car. People were idiots. Bohan wasn’t wrong when he said that. “Theodore, or Gabriel. Do you like any of them?” She asked, eyes back down at her belly, as Ainsley went back to breathing how she was taught, with the help of Bohan.
Both were considered old names, for someone who didn’t have much of an old name, neither did her siblings. But when she had made the list of the names she heard and liked in the last four or so years, should Ainsley ever have children, the names weren’t as liked then as they were then. Plus, some of them were names that people were tired of, based off some site online. “I thought about Gavin instead of Gabriel, but I think I hate it now.” She laughed, eyes off her stomach, and back on the road. “Look out!” She grabbed the dashboard with both hands and braced herself for the car that couldn’t wait to turn right, even if they weren’t in the right away. Which, they weren’t. “I really don’t want to give birth in this big hunk.” She moaned before sitting back and closing her eyes. Ainsley was placing her life and the baby’s completely in his hands for the time being. She had her work cut out for her soon enough.
“Bohan.” Ainsley sighed out as she saw him spring to life and finish collecting the bag she couldn’t get. Ainsley nodded her head, breathing just as they had practiced together during the classes. If Ainsley wasn’t in so much pain, she would have laughed at the first memory of them in the class. She hadn’t done so well with the breathing thing, so to show her how it was done, because he was a slightly quicker study than she was, he pressed his forehead to hers and had them breath together for a couple rounds. Bohan would be a great dad, Ainsley had no doubt in that.
She looked at him when he said he had things under control, then laughed between her breathing, coughing a little from the surprise of being picked up. She wasn’t a tall woman, or very heavy, but it still surprised her. They were out of the apartment without a word from her, safe in his arms. Ainsley believed that he did have it from here. Nothing would stop them from getting to the hospital. She remembered when she told him she was pregnant, how ready he was to help. To step up where and when it was needed.
While he came around the car, she pressed the buckle inside the latch and when she heard the satisfying ‘click’, her hands went to rest on her enlarged belly. “Please don’t come out yet.” She whispered, almost praying. Giving birth in Bohan’s car was not on her bucket list, or top ten things to do. Ainsley scooted up taller in the passenger seat, hoping to stop the back pain that shocked her to the core. Was he sitting on a nerve or something? The thought diminished when Ainsley realized something she hadn’t before. Or maybe she hadn’t because it only just happened. “My water..” Ainsley said as she looked over at Bohan. “It broke.” Maybe she wouldn’t have a choice in where she gave birth after all.
<Bohan> Water. It broke. Those alerts registered and Bohan’s hand was empty before he knew it. His eyes darted to the seat belt over her belly as she started rising off the seat like she was going somewhere. Thankfully they were at an intersection that was held up by a red light. He reached over and hit the passenger release for the half of the bench seat she was sitting on. It reclined as his other hand landed in the warm slick proof that she was fully committed to delivering. His damp hand lifted and he wiped it off on the denim covering his thigh. The 1978 International Scout II had seen worse sinking into its upholstery and he wasn’t going to sweat the flooding going on beneath her.
“You doing okay?” The light signaled for their lane to start moving and he managed to while reaching over and brushing the side of her face with his hand for contact and reassurance. “We are almost there, Ains.” His foot pressed harder on the gas pedal and he started passing cars when he could.
Bohan opened the glove box and pulled out the envelope inside. He tucked it into the bag once he pulled it in the front seat between them. It wasn’t the time to reveal the contents but the letter inside was given to him to share with her when the baby arrived. He pulled the bag closer to his side as he glanced over at her to see how she was doing. He wondered if she had given names anymore thought. It was more than an attempt at distraction from what hardly could be ignored. He hoped she narrowed down their combined list of twenty to at least ten.
“Any picks on names yet?” The sound of a set of tires skidding caught his attention and he swerved just in time to miss someone who was trying to cut him off. “Idiots are out. Hold on.” He wasn’t about to let the rest of the world get in the way of his own blood arriving to the world. The battered and worn International picked up speed and took ownership of the last stretch of road leading to the hospital emergency entrance.
<Ainsley> Amniotic fluid on her and the car seat. Probably on the floor too. This wasn’t the image that had been in her head the past few months as she crept up on the big day. Ainsley didn’t actually know what it would be like, but none of these ideas came to her mind when they talked about the big day, or prepared for it. And now, there was amniotic fluid on him too. It was probably bound to happen sooner or later, but again, nothing she had thought of until it actually happened.
Her seat reclined and she was thankful for it. A new position meant that maybe the back pain would stop, and she showed it in a weak smile as her head rolled to her left side. “I’m okay. We’re both okay.” She reassured him with a gentle caress to her belly. When he asked about names, Ainsley pressed her upper teeth to her lower lip and thought about it. “I have it down to two.” She said before looking at what was going on around them. She trusted him, but she didn’t trust anyone outside the car. People were idiots. Bohan wasn’t wrong when he said that. “Theodore, or Gabriel. Do you like any of them?” She asked, eyes back down at her belly, as Ainsley went back to breathing how she was taught, with the help of Bohan.
Both were considered old names, for someone who didn’t have much of an old name, neither did her siblings. But when she had made the list of the names she heard and liked in the last four or so years, should Ainsley ever have children, the names weren’t as liked then as they were then. Plus, some of them were names that people were tired of, based off some site online. “I thought about Gavin instead of Gabriel, but I think I hate it now.” She laughed, eyes off her stomach, and back on the road. “Look out!” She grabbed the dashboard with both hands and braced herself for the car that couldn’t wait to turn right, even if they weren’t in the right away. Which, they weren’t. “I really don’t want to give birth in this big hunk.” She moaned before sitting back and closing her eyes. Ainsley was placing her life and the baby’s completely in his hands for the time being. She had her work cut out for her soon enough.
By Chloe
-
Bohan
- Registered User
- Posts: 17
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:15
- CrowNet Handle: Picasso's Padawan
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Bohan> “I like both of those.” He did but had one request regarding Theodore. “Can we agree he won’t be called ‘Teddy’ if you go with Theodore?” He was quick on his reflexes and soon the beast of rolling rubber and steel space frame was bouncing into the drive up in front of the emergency room. “I hate the idea of the little guy being called that.”
Bohan hopped out and was moving around the white vehicle like he was participating in some sort of race against the clock. To him he kind of was. With each quick step he was closer to the check in point and having access to everything needed to ensure that the one insisting on making his first debut would be safe when he did. It was a responsibility he had invested in since he first found out and he was not going to slack on his role now that they arrived.
The sounds of the double emergency doors opening hissed while his back was to whatever or whoever prompted them to retract. The passenger’s door was pulled open and he leaned over the hard round shape of Ainsley’s stomach and unfastened the seat belt. He ignored the fluid that formed into a small but noticeable puddle on the floorboard of the car around her shoes. His left hand slid between the small of her back and seat behind her. The right hand guided her to pivot with the gentle pressure on her outer left thigh. All the while he made sure to keep his eyes on her own. The sounds of people moving behind him were equally ignored until one voice asked the question that had everything to do with why he was standing there.
“Is today the big day?” A few light sounds of uniform shoes stepping around for a better view finally got his limited attention to check on who was invading their space.
“Yes. Her water broke about ten minutes ago and her contractions are…” He felt like he should have been able to tell the nurse summoning for others to get a wheelchair. Bohan’s attention went back to Ainsley. “How far apart are they?”
“Sir, if you step back we can get her seated so you can check her in.” He felt the body of one at his back and hands lightly placed on his upper arms to prompt him to move as asked. “She will be in good hands.”
All that was left for him to do was what he would be doing a lot of. He stepped back and waited. A few paces back and forth was all the time it took for the passenger seat to be empty. Once it was he leaned in getting more damp thanks to the saturated seat as he reached for and took hold of their delivery bag. He slammed the door fully ready to follow the wheelchair crew in the doors the disappeared through. An attendant caught him before he could.
“Excuse me. We have two emergency vehicles en route and they are due to arrive in the next minutes. Could you please move your car to the patient parking?” Bohan found no compromise in the face that was looking directly at him. “Don’t worry. She is just fine. Is this your first?”
Bohan couldn’t answer. His feet were already carrying him back around the car while the sounds of sirens increased. The engine rumbled and finally fired up. With sound of the sirens was nearly on his back bumper he pushed the pedal to make the relic roll out of the way and towards the designated visitor parking.
<Ainsley> They were there after a few more stop lights, and swerves, not that Ainsley expected anything else or less. Bohan promised he would be here for this little guy and her, and he never failed in that promise. “Sorry.” She said between breaths, “about the seat.” Was finished while he put her in the wheelchair.
“I don't know. Maybe, two or three minutes? My back.” She complained quietly, while Bohan was being asked to move the car. She hadn't ignored his request, the opposite, really. Not wanting him to be a Teddy either, her choice had been made with his help. Even if Bohan didn't know that. Yet.
While Bohan was taking care of the large metal tank; a nickname she gave it the first time her eyes landed on it, she was being processed in as a patient. She didn't need to give a lot of details, as the nurses knew her by now. Two false go times had more or less gotten her known. One time was just braxton hicks, the other was when Ainsley was so sure he was coming when she started feeling his drop a few weeks ago. Never mind having been dilated for over a month now.
“He can come in. I want him with me.” Ainsley insisted as a band was put around her wrist. “First, let’s get you and the baby on a monitor.” The nurse gently coaxed her as she wheeled the chair towards a room. As they rolled by the nurses station, Ainsley saw her last name being written next to a room number, while the nurses talked about the women already in the birthing unit and their new arrival.
As soon as she was in the room that was going to be hers for however long this process took, her nurse gave her two hospital gowns and pointed her in the direction of the bathroom. Ainsley was able to change before a couple nurses came and hooked her belly up to a monitor. “Did he come back yet?” Her eyes looked around the room, but didn’t see Bohan. The nurse shook her head before replying with a ”Not yet.”, as Ainsley found a spot on the corner of the extra wide delivery bed.
Bohan hopped out and was moving around the white vehicle like he was participating in some sort of race against the clock. To him he kind of was. With each quick step he was closer to the check in point and having access to everything needed to ensure that the one insisting on making his first debut would be safe when he did. It was a responsibility he had invested in since he first found out and he was not going to slack on his role now that they arrived.
The sounds of the double emergency doors opening hissed while his back was to whatever or whoever prompted them to retract. The passenger’s door was pulled open and he leaned over the hard round shape of Ainsley’s stomach and unfastened the seat belt. He ignored the fluid that formed into a small but noticeable puddle on the floorboard of the car around her shoes. His left hand slid between the small of her back and seat behind her. The right hand guided her to pivot with the gentle pressure on her outer left thigh. All the while he made sure to keep his eyes on her own. The sounds of people moving behind him were equally ignored until one voice asked the question that had everything to do with why he was standing there.
“Is today the big day?” A few light sounds of uniform shoes stepping around for a better view finally got his limited attention to check on who was invading their space.
“Yes. Her water broke about ten minutes ago and her contractions are…” He felt like he should have been able to tell the nurse summoning for others to get a wheelchair. Bohan’s attention went back to Ainsley. “How far apart are they?”
“Sir, if you step back we can get her seated so you can check her in.” He felt the body of one at his back and hands lightly placed on his upper arms to prompt him to move as asked. “She will be in good hands.”
All that was left for him to do was what he would be doing a lot of. He stepped back and waited. A few paces back and forth was all the time it took for the passenger seat to be empty. Once it was he leaned in getting more damp thanks to the saturated seat as he reached for and took hold of their delivery bag. He slammed the door fully ready to follow the wheelchair crew in the doors the disappeared through. An attendant caught him before he could.
“Excuse me. We have two emergency vehicles en route and they are due to arrive in the next minutes. Could you please move your car to the patient parking?” Bohan found no compromise in the face that was looking directly at him. “Don’t worry. She is just fine. Is this your first?”
Bohan couldn’t answer. His feet were already carrying him back around the car while the sounds of sirens increased. The engine rumbled and finally fired up. With sound of the sirens was nearly on his back bumper he pushed the pedal to make the relic roll out of the way and towards the designated visitor parking.
<Ainsley> They were there after a few more stop lights, and swerves, not that Ainsley expected anything else or less. Bohan promised he would be here for this little guy and her, and he never failed in that promise. “Sorry.” She said between breaths, “about the seat.” Was finished while he put her in the wheelchair.
“I don't know. Maybe, two or three minutes? My back.” She complained quietly, while Bohan was being asked to move the car. She hadn't ignored his request, the opposite, really. Not wanting him to be a Teddy either, her choice had been made with his help. Even if Bohan didn't know that. Yet.
While Bohan was taking care of the large metal tank; a nickname she gave it the first time her eyes landed on it, she was being processed in as a patient. She didn't need to give a lot of details, as the nurses knew her by now. Two false go times had more or less gotten her known. One time was just braxton hicks, the other was when Ainsley was so sure he was coming when she started feeling his drop a few weeks ago. Never mind having been dilated for over a month now.
“He can come in. I want him with me.” Ainsley insisted as a band was put around her wrist. “First, let’s get you and the baby on a monitor.” The nurse gently coaxed her as she wheeled the chair towards a room. As they rolled by the nurses station, Ainsley saw her last name being written next to a room number, while the nurses talked about the women already in the birthing unit and their new arrival.
As soon as she was in the room that was going to be hers for however long this process took, her nurse gave her two hospital gowns and pointed her in the direction of the bathroom. Ainsley was able to change before a couple nurses came and hooked her belly up to a monitor. “Did he come back yet?” Her eyes looked around the room, but didn’t see Bohan. The nurse shook her head before replying with a ”Not yet.”, as Ainsley found a spot on the corner of the extra wide delivery bed.
-
Ainsley (DELETED 8973)
- Posts: 36
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:16
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Bohan> He walked in a fast pace through the hall leaving the security guard beside him no choice but to shift into a slow jog to keep up. It was getting harder to grasp that there would be no more trips for the late night ice-cream cones that they would eat in the car while the checked the details of their latest dry run to the hospital. They would stare out at the drive up while the older than dirt Scout was parked to see all the action coming and going. Gurneys would get be lifted out of ambulances, cars coming to an abrupt halt. He promised her they would get there safe. Everything would be just fine. So far his word was still in good standing.They successfully made their run and now all he had to do to keep their plans moving along was to get to her side.
“If you can just sign one last time on this…” The security guard’s keys were jingling along as he tried to keep up with Bohan’s long stride. “Excuse me.” A nurse crossing their path was in perfect timing to narrowly miss Bohan colliding with her but the guard now behind and to the right of him was not so lucky. “Sorry about that.”
After rounding a corner he was in the area he had seen a couple times during the monthly tours. Only one was required to complete the lamaze class but they went to each one offered. Each time they took a picture of her standing at the station desk offering a side profile of her progress. The anticipation only grew as he found her name listed next to her assigned room number on the board. The tote over his shoulder dropped and he waved to the familiar face behind the desk.
“You are just in time.” She slipped a hard chart into the dividing cabinet behind where she was sitting. “I will get you set up before you go in.” Another clipboard was pulled out and the identification bracelet he would be expected to wear was held out waiting for his wrist. “I need to ask the typical questions before I get your gown and take you back.”
Ten minutes later he entered the room that Ainsley occupied. Allowing the door to slip gently from his fingers he waited until it was fully closed before making his way to the bed that really didn’t seem all that comfortable. Then again she was in labor. She was liable to look uncomfortable just about anywhere.
“I am here.” He set the tote down on the guest chair that looked like it reclined and was adequate if you were under five feet tall max. “You need anything?”
“If you can just sign one last time on this…” The security guard’s keys were jingling along as he tried to keep up with Bohan’s long stride. “Excuse me.” A nurse crossing their path was in perfect timing to narrowly miss Bohan colliding with her but the guard now behind and to the right of him was not so lucky. “Sorry about that.”
After rounding a corner he was in the area he had seen a couple times during the monthly tours. Only one was required to complete the lamaze class but they went to each one offered. Each time they took a picture of her standing at the station desk offering a side profile of her progress. The anticipation only grew as he found her name listed next to her assigned room number on the board. The tote over his shoulder dropped and he waved to the familiar face behind the desk.
“You are just in time.” She slipped a hard chart into the dividing cabinet behind where she was sitting. “I will get you set up before you go in.” Another clipboard was pulled out and the identification bracelet he would be expected to wear was held out waiting for his wrist. “I need to ask the typical questions before I get your gown and take you back.”
Ten minutes later he entered the room that Ainsley occupied. Allowing the door to slip gently from his fingers he waited until it was fully closed before making his way to the bed that really didn’t seem all that comfortable. Then again she was in labor. She was liable to look uncomfortable just about anywhere.
“I am here.” He set the tote down on the guest chair that looked like it reclined and was adequate if you were under five feet tall max. “You need anything?”
By Chloe
-
Bohan
- Registered User
- Posts: 17
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:15
- CrowNet Handle: Picasso's Padawan
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Ainsley> She remembered that lounging around or lying down wasn’t productive to the way things went. While she waited for Bohan, Ainsley had stood at the side of the bed, perfecting her breathing again and bore every contraction that came. She wanted a natural labor, or as natural as possible. That meant no epidural and if she could, no shot of any kind either to give her a resting period. Ainsley knew women throughout the years managed just fine, she believed she could too.
But, her best laid plans were cast aside as the back pain started once again and she felt some relief from lying on her left side, away from the door. Her face was streamed with tears and sweat from the heat she felt during the labor process, and the pain she endured while waiting for it to be the right time. They were close; the contractions getting shorter and shorter between the minutes, but Ainsley wasn’t at a full ten yet.
“You found me.” She said when she heard Bohan’s voice, her head turning to see him entering the room more. “It should be anytime now.” She murmured softly, closing her eyes and breathing quickly as she felt her body ripple through another contraction. A sound was heard, a beeping sound and then another and another, which had her eyes opening. The door flew open and in came two nurses, one who was looking at the monitor, the other coming around to her side. ”Honey, I want you to roll over on your other side, or even your back if you can. Your little guy doesn’t like that position anymore.” The nurse suggested, even offering to help her with a couple arms as Ainsley found her back. She cried out as the bed seemed to press against her lower back, the very areas that caused her so much pain. “It hurts so bad.” She said between breaths, her hair sticking to her neck and wrapping around her jawline from the sweat that slicked it. ”Try her other side.” The other nurse instructed as the beeping continued, causing another nurse to come in, followed by the delivery doctor. Not her OB, as she wasn’t on call tonight, but she had met this one a couple times when her OB had been sick or on vacation in the early months of her pregnancy.
“Let’s see what we have going on here with the little guy.” The doctor offered as he grabbed a rolling stool after a quick squirt of hand sanitizer and was given gloves by the nurse that came in before him. ”He’s under some slight stress.” A nurse said loud enough for everyone to hear, but not in a tone that implied anything was wrong. “Put your legs up, Ainsley. I’m going to see if I can see what’s going on inside.” He prompted, and she did exactly what he asked her to do. “Is everything okay? Is my baby okay?” Ainsley asked, a look of horror washing through her eyes as she looked at Bohan. ”He’s in good hands. Doctor Mattheson has delivered over two hundred babies.” The nurse assured her as the beeping seemed to get louder, but maybe that was only because Ainsley was in panic mode.
Seconds later, the doctor was reeling back from her and standing up. “We’ve got to get him out. The cord is stressing him out. Prep the O.R.” When that was said, the room seemed to fill with life, but a different sort of life. Not the happy, jovial sort, but the rushed, do or die feeling. The sides of her bed was pulled up, things that weren’t absolutely needed were pulled off and away from her as two nurses started to make their way out of the room with Ainsley along for the ride. The nurse that didn’t go right with them looked at Bohan. ”The cord is around his neck. You can come down the hall to wait, but you can’t come in. Not until they’re both safe.” She gave Bohan a reassuring clamp of a hand around his upper arm, with a smile before she left the room to assist where she was needed.
<Bohan> He followed the steps of the nurse that continued on towards the double doors where Ainsley disappeared through. Just like that she was gone. He stood there for a few minutes refusing to move or just unable to. It was hard to tell. Finally the sounds of voices from the other side of the door gave him hope that they were coming back to retrieve him. Maybe it wasn’t really happening. Someone was mixed up. They had to be. It wasn’t even her regular doctor with her and the more time he had to think about it he realized this was not anything they covered in the classes. Relief started in before the door fully opened. A nurse pulled off her surgical cap and took off in a run down a small side corridor. The look on her face was one he couldn’t shake. He walked in a slow circle while his heart rate did double time.
Two more scrub clad employees breezed past him leaving the doors rattling in their wake. Bohan couldn’t move more than twenty feet from the doors before he retraced his steps back to the spot he was not permitted to go beyond. Every minute that ticked by that he was left standing without any word was feeling like an eternity. He felt powerless, which he essentially was. Back and forth gowned and uniformed bodies went while he stood there feeling about as out of place as a pedestrian hoping for a bus to come along, pick him up and take him to where he really needed to be. Fifteen minutes passed and he decided he was entitled to an update.That is what she would expect if the roles were reversed. Ainsley never waited patiently. Nor would he. He wouldn’t stop until he got one. He promised her that when she told him she was going to have this baby.
“Hey…” He stepped into the path of what looked to be an exhausted resident in a white lab coat. “I need to know how…” His words were drowned out over the hospital paging system coming in loud and clear above them.
“Your attention please. Code Blue to labor and delivery. Your attention please Code Blue to labor and delivery…” The sounds that came after that was lost in the sudden burst of motion and traffic flying past him leaving him no choice but to stand where he was or get in the way.
The message played over in his head and it felt like his chest was filling up and ready to explode. Pressure. So much pressure as the panic set in causing the air around him to feel as though it dropped at least forty degrees. His eyes found the doors that kept swinging back and forth. Ainsley. He was moving before anything else came to mind.
“No!” He refused to stay back anymore. He went towards the doors with a step that was not going to end until he reached her. His hand pushed on the doors and he walked in like he had been back there at least thirty times in the last two hours. “Ainsley.” He voice was firm and direct to the first he found behind a surgical mask. “Where is she.”
But, her best laid plans were cast aside as the back pain started once again and she felt some relief from lying on her left side, away from the door. Her face was streamed with tears and sweat from the heat she felt during the labor process, and the pain she endured while waiting for it to be the right time. They were close; the contractions getting shorter and shorter between the minutes, but Ainsley wasn’t at a full ten yet.
“You found me.” She said when she heard Bohan’s voice, her head turning to see him entering the room more. “It should be anytime now.” She murmured softly, closing her eyes and breathing quickly as she felt her body ripple through another contraction. A sound was heard, a beeping sound and then another and another, which had her eyes opening. The door flew open and in came two nurses, one who was looking at the monitor, the other coming around to her side. ”Honey, I want you to roll over on your other side, or even your back if you can. Your little guy doesn’t like that position anymore.” The nurse suggested, even offering to help her with a couple arms as Ainsley found her back. She cried out as the bed seemed to press against her lower back, the very areas that caused her so much pain. “It hurts so bad.” She said between breaths, her hair sticking to her neck and wrapping around her jawline from the sweat that slicked it. ”Try her other side.” The other nurse instructed as the beeping continued, causing another nurse to come in, followed by the delivery doctor. Not her OB, as she wasn’t on call tonight, but she had met this one a couple times when her OB had been sick or on vacation in the early months of her pregnancy.
“Let’s see what we have going on here with the little guy.” The doctor offered as he grabbed a rolling stool after a quick squirt of hand sanitizer and was given gloves by the nurse that came in before him. ”He’s under some slight stress.” A nurse said loud enough for everyone to hear, but not in a tone that implied anything was wrong. “Put your legs up, Ainsley. I’m going to see if I can see what’s going on inside.” He prompted, and she did exactly what he asked her to do. “Is everything okay? Is my baby okay?” Ainsley asked, a look of horror washing through her eyes as she looked at Bohan. ”He’s in good hands. Doctor Mattheson has delivered over two hundred babies.” The nurse assured her as the beeping seemed to get louder, but maybe that was only because Ainsley was in panic mode.
Seconds later, the doctor was reeling back from her and standing up. “We’ve got to get him out. The cord is stressing him out. Prep the O.R.” When that was said, the room seemed to fill with life, but a different sort of life. Not the happy, jovial sort, but the rushed, do or die feeling. The sides of her bed was pulled up, things that weren’t absolutely needed were pulled off and away from her as two nurses started to make their way out of the room with Ainsley along for the ride. The nurse that didn’t go right with them looked at Bohan. ”The cord is around his neck. You can come down the hall to wait, but you can’t come in. Not until they’re both safe.” She gave Bohan a reassuring clamp of a hand around his upper arm, with a smile before she left the room to assist where she was needed.
<Bohan> He followed the steps of the nurse that continued on towards the double doors where Ainsley disappeared through. Just like that she was gone. He stood there for a few minutes refusing to move or just unable to. It was hard to tell. Finally the sounds of voices from the other side of the door gave him hope that they were coming back to retrieve him. Maybe it wasn’t really happening. Someone was mixed up. They had to be. It wasn’t even her regular doctor with her and the more time he had to think about it he realized this was not anything they covered in the classes. Relief started in before the door fully opened. A nurse pulled off her surgical cap and took off in a run down a small side corridor. The look on her face was one he couldn’t shake. He walked in a slow circle while his heart rate did double time.
Two more scrub clad employees breezed past him leaving the doors rattling in their wake. Bohan couldn’t move more than twenty feet from the doors before he retraced his steps back to the spot he was not permitted to go beyond. Every minute that ticked by that he was left standing without any word was feeling like an eternity. He felt powerless, which he essentially was. Back and forth gowned and uniformed bodies went while he stood there feeling about as out of place as a pedestrian hoping for a bus to come along, pick him up and take him to where he really needed to be. Fifteen minutes passed and he decided he was entitled to an update.That is what she would expect if the roles were reversed. Ainsley never waited patiently. Nor would he. He wouldn’t stop until he got one. He promised her that when she told him she was going to have this baby.
“Hey…” He stepped into the path of what looked to be an exhausted resident in a white lab coat. “I need to know how…” His words were drowned out over the hospital paging system coming in loud and clear above them.
“Your attention please. Code Blue to labor and delivery. Your attention please Code Blue to labor and delivery…” The sounds that came after that was lost in the sudden burst of motion and traffic flying past him leaving him no choice but to stand where he was or get in the way.
The message played over in his head and it felt like his chest was filling up and ready to explode. Pressure. So much pressure as the panic set in causing the air around him to feel as though it dropped at least forty degrees. His eyes found the doors that kept swinging back and forth. Ainsley. He was moving before anything else came to mind.
“No!” He refused to stay back anymore. He went towards the doors with a step that was not going to end until he reached her. His hand pushed on the doors and he walked in like he had been back there at least thirty times in the last two hours. “Ainsley.” He voice was firm and direct to the first he found behind a surgical mask. “Where is she.”
-
Ainsley (DELETED 8973)
- Posts: 36
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:16
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Ainsley> “Her blood pressure is dropping.” Another nurse called out as Ainsley was brought to the sterile room, the hand of the superior nurse in charge working on keeping the baby simulated and focused by probing at him with her fingers as they prepped Ainsley for an emergency c-section. ”Ainsley, we’re going to have to sedate you. This baby is coming through c-section. He’s got to.” Another nurse told her, suspecting that might be an area of contention because she wanted to do it as natural as possible. Ainsley just nodded her head until it more or less bobbed on its own and she felt the urge to sleep rise. “Will he be okay?” She asked, eyes on her stomach before her line of sight was met with a blue curtain that covered the lower part of her body, blocking her view. Thankfully.
It was all like a dream, the way she was there, but not really there. They were working around her, telling her she shouldn’t feel anything other than some slight pulling at best, while they worked to get him out, as both of their lives seemed to depend on it now. The respiratory guy was talking to her, telling her that they were almost there and she would see her son soon, but it didn’t really register with her. How could he be coming so soon? This wasn’t what they had practiced at all. Where was Borhan? ”Heartbeat is dropping.” This time the voice was filled with tension as Ainsley tried to focus. Her heartbeat? His? She mumbled something that probably sounded like nothing to them, but in her head, he was the answer. So what was meant to be ‘save my baby’ probably sounded like ‘serm mer ay.’
Then, the room was eerily still and lifeless. There was no more noises other than the occasional beeping of one monitor as her eyes closed. There was no sound of a crying baby. No congratulations offered. All that came to her was a few minutes of rest as the sedative was pumped into her system at a faster rate so that they could work on closing her up now that her little prince was out.
<Bohan> “There is no way in hell she is going through this alone.” The tone of his voice was leaving no question how serious he was.
His left foot raised up from the floor and the disposable surgical bootie slid on as it was designed to over his large shoe. The right foot followed suit and as quick as that both of his feet were ready for where he was heading. Ainsley’s face came to mind. Specifically her smile. Nine months ago. The way it stood out while the tears were traveling down each cheek. She tried to hide her pain, holding her chin high but he knew better. Even then he knew that she had been carrying far than she would ever admit. His jaw tightened in the joints at the memory.
“Yes, but she isn’t alone.” The nurse sent out to discuss what was going on gave it one last try but he could tell Bohan was not going to bend. He didn’t exactly blame him either.
“It is not the same.” He started sliding the surgical cap over his head and fit it around his hairline. “And right now I don’t think there is time to explain it to you,man.So lead the way or I will find it myself.”
“Fine. It is going to be busy. You will be the most help staying at her head and behind the curtain.” The hand wearing the fading shine of hand sanitizer tapped at the large silver automatic door opener. “Follow me.”
The topping of a surgical cap was added to his head as he went through the doors. The bright lights and the cool air flowed with him as he moved. Monitors and carts were passing back and forth as they side stepped a few and headed through the hall. It was seemed like it was a mile just to reach where she was. A final right and the push of the nurse’s hands on the doors revealed Ainsley in a sterile sea of white and blue draping. Beeping and hisses of machines surrounded where he was expected to stand. Blood was visible, a tray of silver instruments on a covering of blue. Hands were working fast over her stomach and so were those that pressed at his back guiding to where he could be out of the way.
“It shouldn’t be long now. Just so you know the baby is out. The team is doing whatever is needed.” A gloved hand pointed to a group surrounding a clear bassinet that appeared so unwelcoming. “I’m sorry.”
Sorry? The word seemed so foreign to him. It had no place in the setting he was in. He couldn’t process that it was saying so much more than he was picking up on. There had to be at least twelve gowned and gloved in the room. Each minute that passed had more than less moving around. Some left and more came back. Eyes found him and it was eerie what he could pick up on behind the masks. Something was there he refused to accept. He ignored the sounds of shuffling as he caught the overhead page for the name of someone he would never be able to recall if needed. He was in a place he never quite appreciated until he was standing in it and breathing it in through the three ply meltblown material over his face. He leaned over and whispered in Ainsley’s ear. She was warm. Her eyes found him with a slow roll beneath otherwise sedated lids.
“I’m here, Ainsley.” He curled his hand around her head and pressed his bristly mask covered cheek to connect with her. “He is out.”
The words he spoke inspired him to stand straight and look towards where Theodore or Gabriel was. Still no sounds. No crying. Any second he would open up his lungs and cry out. It was what all the babies do. A mask glanced towards him and his eyes instantly burned. He took in a deep breath and held on to it.
It was all like a dream, the way she was there, but not really there. They were working around her, telling her she shouldn’t feel anything other than some slight pulling at best, while they worked to get him out, as both of their lives seemed to depend on it now. The respiratory guy was talking to her, telling her that they were almost there and she would see her son soon, but it didn’t really register with her. How could he be coming so soon? This wasn’t what they had practiced at all. Where was Borhan? ”Heartbeat is dropping.” This time the voice was filled with tension as Ainsley tried to focus. Her heartbeat? His? She mumbled something that probably sounded like nothing to them, but in her head, he was the answer. So what was meant to be ‘save my baby’ probably sounded like ‘serm mer ay.’
Then, the room was eerily still and lifeless. There was no more noises other than the occasional beeping of one monitor as her eyes closed. There was no sound of a crying baby. No congratulations offered. All that came to her was a few minutes of rest as the sedative was pumped into her system at a faster rate so that they could work on closing her up now that her little prince was out.
<Bohan> “There is no way in hell she is going through this alone.” The tone of his voice was leaving no question how serious he was.
His left foot raised up from the floor and the disposable surgical bootie slid on as it was designed to over his large shoe. The right foot followed suit and as quick as that both of his feet were ready for where he was heading. Ainsley’s face came to mind. Specifically her smile. Nine months ago. The way it stood out while the tears were traveling down each cheek. She tried to hide her pain, holding her chin high but he knew better. Even then he knew that she had been carrying far than she would ever admit. His jaw tightened in the joints at the memory.
“Yes, but she isn’t alone.” The nurse sent out to discuss what was going on gave it one last try but he could tell Bohan was not going to bend. He didn’t exactly blame him either.
“It is not the same.” He started sliding the surgical cap over his head and fit it around his hairline. “And right now I don’t think there is time to explain it to you,man.So lead the way or I will find it myself.”
“Fine. It is going to be busy. You will be the most help staying at her head and behind the curtain.” The hand wearing the fading shine of hand sanitizer tapped at the large silver automatic door opener. “Follow me.”
The topping of a surgical cap was added to his head as he went through the doors. The bright lights and the cool air flowed with him as he moved. Monitors and carts were passing back and forth as they side stepped a few and headed through the hall. It was seemed like it was a mile just to reach where she was. A final right and the push of the nurse’s hands on the doors revealed Ainsley in a sterile sea of white and blue draping. Beeping and hisses of machines surrounded where he was expected to stand. Blood was visible, a tray of silver instruments on a covering of blue. Hands were working fast over her stomach and so were those that pressed at his back guiding to where he could be out of the way.
“It shouldn’t be long now. Just so you know the baby is out. The team is doing whatever is needed.” A gloved hand pointed to a group surrounding a clear bassinet that appeared so unwelcoming. “I’m sorry.”
Sorry? The word seemed so foreign to him. It had no place in the setting he was in. He couldn’t process that it was saying so much more than he was picking up on. There had to be at least twelve gowned and gloved in the room. Each minute that passed had more than less moving around. Some left and more came back. Eyes found him and it was eerie what he could pick up on behind the masks. Something was there he refused to accept. He ignored the sounds of shuffling as he caught the overhead page for the name of someone he would never be able to recall if needed. He was in a place he never quite appreciated until he was standing in it and breathing it in through the three ply meltblown material over his face. He leaned over and whispered in Ainsley’s ear. She was warm. Her eyes found him with a slow roll beneath otherwise sedated lids.
“I’m here, Ainsley.” He curled his hand around her head and pressed his bristly mask covered cheek to connect with her. “He is out.”
The words he spoke inspired him to stand straight and look towards where Theodore or Gabriel was. Still no sounds. No crying. Any second he would open up his lungs and cry out. It was what all the babies do. A mask glanced towards him and his eyes instantly burned. He took in a deep breath and held on to it.
By Chloe
-
Bohan
- Registered User
- Posts: 17
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:15
- CrowNet Handle: Picasso's Padawan
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Ainsley> She was cold, because it was so undoubtedly cold in the room. Why? Why did it need to be this cold? Ainsley knew the reason why, but still she question it, as a shiver rolled up her spine and fanned out to her toes and fingertips. No part of her body felt warmer than the other, even with the gown covering her upper body, and the other half being, what she assumed was naked as the day she was born.
Born. Where was he? Where was the baby? Where was her baby? Bohan’s voice drew her in, only because he had that ability. Everyone knew it. Engaging, is what a lot of people referred to him as when talking about him. Artists were like that though, weren’t they? Eccentric and engaging.
“Here.” She murmured, her head rolling to the side he was at, allowing her cheek to nestle against his facial contact as Ainsley closed her eyes. There was always a great comfort with his presence, even through any rough patches they endured through the years. It was typical, given their relationship, but they remained close through everything.
”She’s going to be groggy for a while.” A nurse informed Bohan, but both of them could hear it given the woman’s proximity to them both. ”Natural effects of the sedative.” The nurse looked at Ainsley, offering her a small, but forced smile. “Where?” Ainsley looked away from the nurse to focus on Bohan. Was it supposed to be this quiet? Was her baby in another room? Was something wrong with him? “Gabriel. Where is he?” Ainsley asked through broken words, her eyes off Bohan as she tipped her head backwards to see where he was at. All she could see were nurses and the corner of the bassinet. “Bohan.” Her voice seemed focus now, sharp, but focused as she tried to see past the collection of hospital staff.
”Is that his name? Gabriel?” Another nurse asked as she came around to the opposite side of Bohan, claiming the left side of Ainsley’s body, attempting to shift her focus for a while, so the rest of the staff could get him cleaned up. She crouched down so that she could be at face level with Ainsley, her voice lacking any real spark to it. ”The doctor’s almost finished closing you up. Then he’ll be up here to talk with you, Ainsley.” A gloved hand came to touch her shoulder in a comforting manner, finally causing Ainsley to look away from the crowd that was around her baby. “Bring him.” She swallowed, looking to Bohan. “Here. I-I…” She swallowed again, then looked at the approaching steps of the doctor. His gaze went between the both of them, before landing on Ainsley. ”The cord was wrapped around his neck for too long. I’m sorry, Ainsley. We did everything we could.” He looked at Bohan then, and shook his head. This would be the first time in just under a decade that a baby he delivered hadn’t made it, and you could see in his eyes the frustration, guilt and pain that brought him. A life ending before it even began always took a strong toll on anyone involved. ”The nurses are finishing cleaning him up. They’ll bring him around in another minute or two. Again, I’m really sorry to the both of you.” With a final shake of his head, he moved away and slowly stripped off the glove on each hand, before tossing them inside a bin that he opened with his left foot.
It was then she realized that it was quiet because unlike most fables read to children, this was not the typical happy ending kind. It was quiet, because the life had been sucked out of the room, along with that of the life of her little prince. And eerily enough, the room suddenly felt that much colder as tears welled up in the corners of Ainsley’s eyes and spilled over at the devastation and heartbreak she suddenly felt.
<Bohan> The sound of his name coming from her left an ache with the awareness that left no question. The most painful truth that could come to them in that moment was waiting to be delivered. The effects would be unforgettable. All of it was insidious in its onset. Dull, deep and lingering much like he had been hit in the chest by a ball he didn’t see coming until it was too late. It literally hurt to breathe. Each time he tried to inhale his lips turned inward and he felt like a coward for avoiding looking at her while the doctor spoke. His eyes burned more and he blinked faster when the news was delivered.
It was then that his eyes found her once more and his hand was curled protectively around her own. He pulled his mask off his face and the surgical cap off his head. His cheeks were damp and there was no way to hide the tears that followed. Gabriel. She chose Gabriel. His eyes searched the room and discovered the nurse coming towards them. Bohan swallowed hard and released the breath through his lips that he had been holding onto longer than he realized.
The air was so cold his skin was peppering with all those little bumps that come out when he neglects to wear enough layers in the winter. Despite all of that there was his free hand pulling at the last of the ties that kept everything on him he no longer needed. The blue mask that held the salt of his tears floated to his feet. The bundle of blanket resting in the nurse’s folded arms came to Ainsley's Chest and the Little Prince that they had waited nine long months for finally was revealed as the blanket was pulled back.
Bohan must have looked like he needed something because the anesthesiologist guided a stool behind his legs while his hand clapped over his left shoulder and squeezed firmly. There was nothing left to do but allow the knees that did their best to hold him up finally gave way to the flowing sensation of defeat consuming his body. The first sight of his nephew resting on his sister’s chest took his breath away. So much of him stared in disbelief waiting for the fragile lifeless cheeks to puff up suddenly and allow a cry to crush the the silence that was suffocating all within the room.
He sat there empty. There were volumes of words back in his apartment to apply to everything. Or so he thought. Messages to inspire fight, resolve to go forward in the most challenging times and yet he sat there drawing up a blank. Nothing could possibly be said. Instead he did the only thing he could do besides ignore the tears streaming down his face. His hand reached out and a single fingertip caressed the side of Gabriel’s face. So warm the contact was that it played on the fading hope that any moment life would fill those tiny lungs and limbs.
“Gabriel…” He choked on the name escaping his lips. Instead of forcing out what would likely not be without another break in his voice he leaned down and pressed his face lightly to the top of Ainsley’s head. He would be there for whatever came next. And everything else after that. “He is beautiful, Ainsley.”
Is was the correct word. Nothing, not even untimely death, would rob Gabriel of the full value of his existence. He felt it beneath his fingers, could see a world that took place in far less time than they planned on but it was all there in his sister’s arms. He looked up just in time to watch the remaining bodies in the room leave through the doors. He still had not breathed and finally with what seemed no choice left he sucked in enough air for what would be enough for all of them if needed. If only it was that simple.
Born. Where was he? Where was the baby? Where was her baby? Bohan’s voice drew her in, only because he had that ability. Everyone knew it. Engaging, is what a lot of people referred to him as when talking about him. Artists were like that though, weren’t they? Eccentric and engaging.
“Here.” She murmured, her head rolling to the side he was at, allowing her cheek to nestle against his facial contact as Ainsley closed her eyes. There was always a great comfort with his presence, even through any rough patches they endured through the years. It was typical, given their relationship, but they remained close through everything.
”She’s going to be groggy for a while.” A nurse informed Bohan, but both of them could hear it given the woman’s proximity to them both. ”Natural effects of the sedative.” The nurse looked at Ainsley, offering her a small, but forced smile. “Where?” Ainsley looked away from the nurse to focus on Bohan. Was it supposed to be this quiet? Was her baby in another room? Was something wrong with him? “Gabriel. Where is he?” Ainsley asked through broken words, her eyes off Bohan as she tipped her head backwards to see where he was at. All she could see were nurses and the corner of the bassinet. “Bohan.” Her voice seemed focus now, sharp, but focused as she tried to see past the collection of hospital staff.
”Is that his name? Gabriel?” Another nurse asked as she came around to the opposite side of Bohan, claiming the left side of Ainsley’s body, attempting to shift her focus for a while, so the rest of the staff could get him cleaned up. She crouched down so that she could be at face level with Ainsley, her voice lacking any real spark to it. ”The doctor’s almost finished closing you up. Then he’ll be up here to talk with you, Ainsley.” A gloved hand came to touch her shoulder in a comforting manner, finally causing Ainsley to look away from the crowd that was around her baby. “Bring him.” She swallowed, looking to Bohan. “Here. I-I…” She swallowed again, then looked at the approaching steps of the doctor. His gaze went between the both of them, before landing on Ainsley. ”The cord was wrapped around his neck for too long. I’m sorry, Ainsley. We did everything we could.” He looked at Bohan then, and shook his head. This would be the first time in just under a decade that a baby he delivered hadn’t made it, and you could see in his eyes the frustration, guilt and pain that brought him. A life ending before it even began always took a strong toll on anyone involved. ”The nurses are finishing cleaning him up. They’ll bring him around in another minute or two. Again, I’m really sorry to the both of you.” With a final shake of his head, he moved away and slowly stripped off the glove on each hand, before tossing them inside a bin that he opened with his left foot.
It was then she realized that it was quiet because unlike most fables read to children, this was not the typical happy ending kind. It was quiet, because the life had been sucked out of the room, along with that of the life of her little prince. And eerily enough, the room suddenly felt that much colder as tears welled up in the corners of Ainsley’s eyes and spilled over at the devastation and heartbreak she suddenly felt.
<Bohan> The sound of his name coming from her left an ache with the awareness that left no question. The most painful truth that could come to them in that moment was waiting to be delivered. The effects would be unforgettable. All of it was insidious in its onset. Dull, deep and lingering much like he had been hit in the chest by a ball he didn’t see coming until it was too late. It literally hurt to breathe. Each time he tried to inhale his lips turned inward and he felt like a coward for avoiding looking at her while the doctor spoke. His eyes burned more and he blinked faster when the news was delivered.
It was then that his eyes found her once more and his hand was curled protectively around her own. He pulled his mask off his face and the surgical cap off his head. His cheeks were damp and there was no way to hide the tears that followed. Gabriel. She chose Gabriel. His eyes searched the room and discovered the nurse coming towards them. Bohan swallowed hard and released the breath through his lips that he had been holding onto longer than he realized.
The air was so cold his skin was peppering with all those little bumps that come out when he neglects to wear enough layers in the winter. Despite all of that there was his free hand pulling at the last of the ties that kept everything on him he no longer needed. The blue mask that held the salt of his tears floated to his feet. The bundle of blanket resting in the nurse’s folded arms came to Ainsley's Chest and the Little Prince that they had waited nine long months for finally was revealed as the blanket was pulled back.
Bohan must have looked like he needed something because the anesthesiologist guided a stool behind his legs while his hand clapped over his left shoulder and squeezed firmly. There was nothing left to do but allow the knees that did their best to hold him up finally gave way to the flowing sensation of defeat consuming his body. The first sight of his nephew resting on his sister’s chest took his breath away. So much of him stared in disbelief waiting for the fragile lifeless cheeks to puff up suddenly and allow a cry to crush the the silence that was suffocating all within the room.
He sat there empty. There were volumes of words back in his apartment to apply to everything. Or so he thought. Messages to inspire fight, resolve to go forward in the most challenging times and yet he sat there drawing up a blank. Nothing could possibly be said. Instead he did the only thing he could do besides ignore the tears streaming down his face. His hand reached out and a single fingertip caressed the side of Gabriel’s face. So warm the contact was that it played on the fading hope that any moment life would fill those tiny lungs and limbs.
“Gabriel…” He choked on the name escaping his lips. Instead of forcing out what would likely not be without another break in his voice he leaned down and pressed his face lightly to the top of Ainsley’s head. He would be there for whatever came next. And everything else after that. “He is beautiful, Ainsley.”
Is was the correct word. Nothing, not even untimely death, would rob Gabriel of the full value of his existence. He felt it beneath his fingers, could see a world that took place in far less time than they planned on but it was all there in his sister’s arms. He looked up just in time to watch the remaining bodies in the room leave through the doors. He still had not breathed and finally with what seemed no choice left he sucked in enough air for what would be enough for all of them if needed. If only it was that simple.
-
Ainsley (DELETED 8973)
- Posts: 36
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:16
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Ainsley> Everything around her seemed difficult to process. The feeling and thoughts alike that of a dream; only in this case it was more of a nightmare. Ainsley didn’t believe what they were telling her. What the staff was telling them both. It seemed impossible that babies or mothers even died during childbirth these days. Not with the medical possibilities that seemed endless; yet here they all were.
The room was slowly getting emptier and emptier by the time her Gabriel was placed on her chest, in that sort of bond the lamaze class instructor talked about. The one that was so important for that to happen immediately after the birth of a baby. It would create a bond-the skin on skin contact. As if doing this would change the outcome of things.
Her little Prince was everything she imagined her would be and more. Bohan was right, he is beautiful, perhaps too beautiful for this world. Maybe that was why it ended up so….wrong. Ainsley’s lips pressed to the top of his soft head, as silent tears fell down her cheeks and landed on his head and shoulders. “H-he i-is.” She stammered out while Ainsley nodded her head, while her fingers found Gabriel’s tiny body once they slipped from Bohan’s clutch. She took a deep breath in and held it before a sob wrenched from her chest, the fingers tightening around what was hers. No, what was around theirs.
“Wh-what do we do n-now?” She asked between tears and sharp breaths. How could she go home without Gabriel? The thought was unbearable. To think about leaving without Gabriel. She carried him for nine months and now she wouldn’t be able to carry him anymore? To have him in her arms. “I can-can’t.” Ainsley admitted while a hand found Gabriel’s head, stroking his cheek, as if attempting to rouse him from a restful slumber. “P-pl-please. I can’t. Ta-take him.” Ainsley admitted as she turned away from Bohan and Gabriel, her gaze locked on the walls of the operating room before they disappeared behind her lids. It was too difficult to see him, and imagine not seeing him again, all at the same time.
<Bohan> For the first time he had no answers. Nothing he could come up with in his hazed grief stricken thoughts was remotely rational or for that matter worth uttering. She needed something solid, tangible to grasp and hold onto so she didn’t drown in the darkness and pain that was filling the room they were abandoned in. When the doors ceased opening and closing it was exactly what it felt like for him. He blinked away the burn coating his eyes. He could not fathom how Ainsley felt. Her body shivered in random moments beneath the harsh too bright surgical lights above them and he was torn inside. This was something he couldn’t fix or convince her with time would get better. As the minutes passed he knew the cold hard truth was there in the body of the little prince that was far too exhausted to fight the fate dealt to him. He had arrived to their arms and there would be no more. Her voice called to him.
Take him?
And he did. For all that she had gone through Bohan did the simplest work of what amounted to slipping his hands gingerly beneath the bundle of warm wrapped blankets. He lifted what was far lighter than he first counted on and brought his nephew to his chest. The world of color that he always viewed with the eye of an artist narrowed considerably to take in what he would remember for his entire lifetime. The face of purity and innocence frozen in a state of serene eternal slumber. The scent of afterbirth and the sterile products that lingered on skin exposed did nothing to deter Bohan from bowing his head to the one that would have brought him to his knees had there not been a chair beneath him. The softest wisps of silk sparsely dusted the miniature head beneath his lips. His eyes closed and the low soft sound of his pain joined his sister’s.
“I…” He barely started to speak and lost the strength to continue.
The scent of Gabriel filling his lungs as he tried to inhale the strength to find his words that clearly tried to fail him. Mercy came with the sound of a door opening offering a brief reprieve from what seemed the nearly impossible task. Shuffling of covered soles over the floor tiles was disturbing as was the flow of air and scent of what had been for lunch in the cafeteria clinging the clothing that passed them by.
How could anything so simple in routine as eating or taking a break be possible in the world they were now trapped in?
The silence stung. It was as if there was something so incredibly wrong and unacceptable in the moment that was supposed to be perfect, life changing for all of them. So unthinkable that no one could look or say something to prove that the three of them were not really as alone or shunned as they all felt. Where were the lifelines and preservers? Where were the angels and gods that came in the moment a miracle was needed and made things shift drastically and set everything back on it’s wished for course?
The lights slowly dimmed and his eyes tracked the one who made it happen until the presence was close. So much so that it couldn’t be ignored. His weary eyes looked upward and found a set that looked down to all three of them. Eyes that seemed to know all about the place they were struggling to make sense of and so far couldn’t. The face said nothing. The lips had the faint signs of years of laughter and random frowns but remained lightly parted as if prepared to move when the time was right. Some hidden wisdom knew that it was not quite yet. It would eventually arrive but for now the sound of silence and expressed tears was what was needed and patience would be abundant.
A longing to pass the unused years of his future to the tiny body in his arms filled him. Bohan bargained out in his grief what he would give up anything and everything to make that happen. The eyes he had to see the world of possibility through, well, he would give it up. All of his wasted energy, his health and his next breath. He wanted to surrender all of it then and there and see that it could all come to a greater good. The alternative incomprehensible loss was not something he could wrap his head around to process. The pain lacing his sister’s features haunted him. Something was breaking and he couldn’t stop it. The warm tears that found his skin as he cupped his hand to her cheek once more burned him within.
The room was slowly getting emptier and emptier by the time her Gabriel was placed on her chest, in that sort of bond the lamaze class instructor talked about. The one that was so important for that to happen immediately after the birth of a baby. It would create a bond-the skin on skin contact. As if doing this would change the outcome of things.
Her little Prince was everything she imagined her would be and more. Bohan was right, he is beautiful, perhaps too beautiful for this world. Maybe that was why it ended up so….wrong. Ainsley’s lips pressed to the top of his soft head, as silent tears fell down her cheeks and landed on his head and shoulders. “H-he i-is.” She stammered out while Ainsley nodded her head, while her fingers found Gabriel’s tiny body once they slipped from Bohan’s clutch. She took a deep breath in and held it before a sob wrenched from her chest, the fingers tightening around what was hers. No, what was around theirs.
“Wh-what do we do n-now?” She asked between tears and sharp breaths. How could she go home without Gabriel? The thought was unbearable. To think about leaving without Gabriel. She carried him for nine months and now she wouldn’t be able to carry him anymore? To have him in her arms. “I can-can’t.” Ainsley admitted while a hand found Gabriel’s head, stroking his cheek, as if attempting to rouse him from a restful slumber. “P-pl-please. I can’t. Ta-take him.” Ainsley admitted as she turned away from Bohan and Gabriel, her gaze locked on the walls of the operating room before they disappeared behind her lids. It was too difficult to see him, and imagine not seeing him again, all at the same time.
<Bohan> For the first time he had no answers. Nothing he could come up with in his hazed grief stricken thoughts was remotely rational or for that matter worth uttering. She needed something solid, tangible to grasp and hold onto so she didn’t drown in the darkness and pain that was filling the room they were abandoned in. When the doors ceased opening and closing it was exactly what it felt like for him. He blinked away the burn coating his eyes. He could not fathom how Ainsley felt. Her body shivered in random moments beneath the harsh too bright surgical lights above them and he was torn inside. This was something he couldn’t fix or convince her with time would get better. As the minutes passed he knew the cold hard truth was there in the body of the little prince that was far too exhausted to fight the fate dealt to him. He had arrived to their arms and there would be no more. Her voice called to him.
Take him?
And he did. For all that she had gone through Bohan did the simplest work of what amounted to slipping his hands gingerly beneath the bundle of warm wrapped blankets. He lifted what was far lighter than he first counted on and brought his nephew to his chest. The world of color that he always viewed with the eye of an artist narrowed considerably to take in what he would remember for his entire lifetime. The face of purity and innocence frozen in a state of serene eternal slumber. The scent of afterbirth and the sterile products that lingered on skin exposed did nothing to deter Bohan from bowing his head to the one that would have brought him to his knees had there not been a chair beneath him. The softest wisps of silk sparsely dusted the miniature head beneath his lips. His eyes closed and the low soft sound of his pain joined his sister’s.
“I…” He barely started to speak and lost the strength to continue.
The scent of Gabriel filling his lungs as he tried to inhale the strength to find his words that clearly tried to fail him. Mercy came with the sound of a door opening offering a brief reprieve from what seemed the nearly impossible task. Shuffling of covered soles over the floor tiles was disturbing as was the flow of air and scent of what had been for lunch in the cafeteria clinging the clothing that passed them by.
How could anything so simple in routine as eating or taking a break be possible in the world they were now trapped in?
The silence stung. It was as if there was something so incredibly wrong and unacceptable in the moment that was supposed to be perfect, life changing for all of them. So unthinkable that no one could look or say something to prove that the three of them were not really as alone or shunned as they all felt. Where were the lifelines and preservers? Where were the angels and gods that came in the moment a miracle was needed and made things shift drastically and set everything back on it’s wished for course?
The lights slowly dimmed and his eyes tracked the one who made it happen until the presence was close. So much so that it couldn’t be ignored. His weary eyes looked upward and found a set that looked down to all three of them. Eyes that seemed to know all about the place they were struggling to make sense of and so far couldn’t. The face said nothing. The lips had the faint signs of years of laughter and random frowns but remained lightly parted as if prepared to move when the time was right. Some hidden wisdom knew that it was not quite yet. It would eventually arrive but for now the sound of silence and expressed tears was what was needed and patience would be abundant.
A longing to pass the unused years of his future to the tiny body in his arms filled him. Bohan bargained out in his grief what he would give up anything and everything to make that happen. The eyes he had to see the world of possibility through, well, he would give it up. All of his wasted energy, his health and his next breath. He wanted to surrender all of it then and there and see that it could all come to a greater good. The alternative incomprehensible loss was not something he could wrap his head around to process. The pain lacing his sister’s features haunted him. Something was breaking and he couldn’t stop it. The warm tears that found his skin as he cupped his hand to her cheek once more burned him within.
By Chloe
-
Bohan
- Registered User
- Posts: 17
- Joined: 04 Nov 2016, 18:15
- CrowNet Handle: Picasso's Padawan
Re: The Little Prince-Bohan
<Ainsley> If she could have, Ainsley would have taken comfort into her own arms and wrapped them around her body and legs. But her limbs felt unnaturally weighted from the variety of drugs that had been pumped inside of her the last handful of hours. She had to settle for just turning away from her brother and her Gabriel, as if neither of them were there. As if this never happened. As if just turning away made it possible to deal with...living.
The new presence in the room was heard, but ignored by Ainsley. What could they say? What could they do, to ease the pain that stabbed her sharper than the sharpest knife, ever could? Instead, her eyes shut more tightly as Ainsley tried to keep this night from her mind. Maybe this was just nothing but a bad dream. What if she never opened her eyes? Could they go back?
No.
They could never go back. She knew it in the deepest, darkest parts of her despair. There was no going back, just forward. That was why the person was in here. The outsider. It wasn’t their place to be here, in Ainsley’s mind. This was their loss. Their shared sorrow. They were intruding on what was theirs. Her eyes opened and narrowed, not seeing the person yet, only the shadow that loomed over her and her brother. “What?” Ainsley said in a lifeless tone, still not looking at either of them, even if she felt the comfort of her brother’s hand on her cheek. If had been there, absorbing all the tears that trickled out of her right eye for a couple seconds now. She could only hope that he didn’t think she was asking him that, but the question was so vague that it was anyone’s guess. Not that she had it in her to try and explain who Ainsley was talking to.
“We just wanted to let you know that you can stay here as long as you need to.” The voice said slowly, and cautiously as she came around in Ainsley’s line sight now. There was no smile, or no frown, just a set of lips that were pressed together, either holding back what they really wanted to say to them both, or keeping them sealed because she didn’t have the right thing to say. Did anyone? “Want to.” She corrected herself, before sighing and getting to the point of her real reason for being here. “We would like to be able to give you a piece of Gabriel before you leave. If that is alright with you? We do it for others like-for everyone.” She rephrased before casting her eyes down upon Ainsley.
“If you want.” Ainsley said blankly, only to turn away from the woman, her watery, glassy eyes finding Bohan and Gabriel, who was still in his hold. “Give Gabriel to her.” She told Bohan, while reaching for Gabriel, but falling short. What was the point of all this? She fought so hard with herself on whether she should even keep Gabriel when she told his dad she was pregnant and he left her. Bohan had fought so hard with her. Stepped up and took the place of Gabriel’s dad, as much as he could, without actually being his dad. Made sure she was taking care of herself, that Gabriel would have the things he needed when he got here. Built the crib, got the rocking chair in his room, and painted the room because she couldn’t deal with the fumes or do heights. One day, Bohan would genuinely make some child very happy to call her brother ‘dad.’
Why did they struggle so hard for this to happen? Nine months seemed to be for nothing. There would be no baby to use the crib. No baby to soothe by the gentle rocking of the chair in his room. No toddler to enjoy the color scheme painted in their room as pictures over the months and years were added to the wall. What was this all for? She looked at her brother questioningly, hoping he could shed some light, but knew neither of them could find the answer right here. Right now. Or ever. “I’m tired.” She said quietly as both hands came to the edge of the table near her head, Ainsley exhaling the weight of her lungs outwards as her eyes closed once again, rewinding the last few months in her mind, reliving every moment that brought them here.
<Bohan:> And then he realized the weight of what had been delivered and came to rest in his arms would have to be left behind. Everything grew heavy along with the truth of both of their worlds coming to rest on his shoulders. His arms shifted Gabriel accepting there would be no stirring of tiny limbs or wincing of eyes. The release of the tiny bundle left his arms cold and his heart fragmented into such a state of disrepair that he felt broken. Acceptance of the loss didn’t always bring understanding. Not for him and not this time. The only part of it he could comprehend is that both of them were gutted by something at work entirely unseen.
His eyes lifted to find the set that seemed to know more about what was taking place than he did. Finally the lips on the face that would be lost in the haze of the grief formed a smile. Just enough to be noticeable beneath the nose that wore the shadow of depth at each side. A little sign of something out there beyond the bone deep ache that seemed reach through into their veins, their flesh that otherwise hurt like hell to move. But finally he did. He had to. Minutes bled into hours while he did.
The warmth of the hand in his bridging the space between them in the car was the only sign that she was still with him. Darkness replaced the sun that had warmed them on the way in. Street lights lost their glow, traffic lights were without colors and meaning. The names on street signs were lines and blurs that stood for nothing anymore. Arrows flashing pointed to nowhere. Nowhere that he could reach. The loss seemed to consume everything. The faces that looked through the windows of neighboring cars were reminders of how life could turn on a dime and leave him behind.
The click of the mechanisms in the deadbolt released the lock on the apartment door. Slowly it opened with the movement of a hand that was numb to the surface beneath it. The scent of her beneath his wrapped and protective arm was strikingly different. He would not tell her that the changes were noticeable at even the most subtle levels. Not yet. Maybe never. His jaw tightened as his arm brought her in a little closer and guided her in. The eclectic industrial decor was the perfect place to bring her. Sterile and open with only the tolerable reminders of the elements they could still identify with. Stone, earth tones and othewise void of life. He didn’t even have a houseplant requiring care. The spare room that was devoted to Gabriel was closed off from view thankfully to the door being closed. The bag carrying their combined clothing and miscellaneous items was placed on the floor as he closed the door once they were both inside.
Bohan was home and yet felt so lost as he stood there in silence allowing Ainsley to adjust to what was around her. Most likely it was everything she didn’t expect to see so soon. They were supposed to take Gabriel home together to her place. Yes. The hardest part was yet to come. Words would happen when the time was right. As if it could ever really be. The sounds of metal clinking echoed as he placed his keys on the gray soapstone counter. His cellphone followed suit as he dropped it next to the souvenir key chain from their 2014 trip to Ibiza with their sister. Curious callers wouldn’t be a distraction. The phone was shut off hours ago. Anyone calling to congratulate or get updates would have to wait. Perhaps indefinitely. Their sister was on her way once she got her own affairs settled. Bohan counted on her to make up for whereever he may fall short with Ainsley and the grief.
“I am just going to grab some things out of my room.” He leaned over and kissed her head then disappeared through the open door to do just that.
Bohan took the picture frames waiting for the first baby pictures and tucked them in the top of his closet under folded bedding and extra pillows were pulled out. A quick tug of the large canvas with what he imagined gracing Gabriel’s nursery walls was flipped and stuffed back against the wall of the modest walk in closet.He shifted his winter jackets to hang in the space to conceal everything else that quickly piled up considered unfit for her viewing until she was ready. Arms full of miscellaneous and general items of consistent need was with him as he returned to the living room.
“Give me a few more minutes and I will change the sheets.” He dropped everything on an oversized chair with a handy matching chocolate ottoman. “You thirsty?” He opened the refrigerator door and was reminded bottled water, vegetables and grapefruit juice is nearly all he seemed to exist on if his fridge was any indication. “Ice water?”
Bohan closed the stainless steel fridge door and pulled open the side by side freezer door. It had empty trays and no ice. He allowed the cold flow of freezing air to be cut off with the door being pressed back into place with a slow defeating sigh. So much for being the perfect host. He looked at her. He was tempted to offer to order take out but he was confident eating wasn't the first thing on her mind. He wanted to apologize for what he didn't really know. He wanted to say something but there were no words. Instead he made his way back to her and found her fingers with his own. Gently he brushed their hold down to her fingertips hoping to say with the connection and contact what couldn't possibly be put into words.
The new presence in the room was heard, but ignored by Ainsley. What could they say? What could they do, to ease the pain that stabbed her sharper than the sharpest knife, ever could? Instead, her eyes shut more tightly as Ainsley tried to keep this night from her mind. Maybe this was just nothing but a bad dream. What if she never opened her eyes? Could they go back?
No.
They could never go back. She knew it in the deepest, darkest parts of her despair. There was no going back, just forward. That was why the person was in here. The outsider. It wasn’t their place to be here, in Ainsley’s mind. This was their loss. Their shared sorrow. They were intruding on what was theirs. Her eyes opened and narrowed, not seeing the person yet, only the shadow that loomed over her and her brother. “What?” Ainsley said in a lifeless tone, still not looking at either of them, even if she felt the comfort of her brother’s hand on her cheek. If had been there, absorbing all the tears that trickled out of her right eye for a couple seconds now. She could only hope that he didn’t think she was asking him that, but the question was so vague that it was anyone’s guess. Not that she had it in her to try and explain who Ainsley was talking to.
“We just wanted to let you know that you can stay here as long as you need to.” The voice said slowly, and cautiously as she came around in Ainsley’s line sight now. There was no smile, or no frown, just a set of lips that were pressed together, either holding back what they really wanted to say to them both, or keeping them sealed because she didn’t have the right thing to say. Did anyone? “Want to.” She corrected herself, before sighing and getting to the point of her real reason for being here. “We would like to be able to give you a piece of Gabriel before you leave. If that is alright with you? We do it for others like-for everyone.” She rephrased before casting her eyes down upon Ainsley.
“If you want.” Ainsley said blankly, only to turn away from the woman, her watery, glassy eyes finding Bohan and Gabriel, who was still in his hold. “Give Gabriel to her.” She told Bohan, while reaching for Gabriel, but falling short. What was the point of all this? She fought so hard with herself on whether she should even keep Gabriel when she told his dad she was pregnant and he left her. Bohan had fought so hard with her. Stepped up and took the place of Gabriel’s dad, as much as he could, without actually being his dad. Made sure she was taking care of herself, that Gabriel would have the things he needed when he got here. Built the crib, got the rocking chair in his room, and painted the room because she couldn’t deal with the fumes or do heights. One day, Bohan would genuinely make some child very happy to call her brother ‘dad.’
Why did they struggle so hard for this to happen? Nine months seemed to be for nothing. There would be no baby to use the crib. No baby to soothe by the gentle rocking of the chair in his room. No toddler to enjoy the color scheme painted in their room as pictures over the months and years were added to the wall. What was this all for? She looked at her brother questioningly, hoping he could shed some light, but knew neither of them could find the answer right here. Right now. Or ever. “I’m tired.” She said quietly as both hands came to the edge of the table near her head, Ainsley exhaling the weight of her lungs outwards as her eyes closed once again, rewinding the last few months in her mind, reliving every moment that brought them here.
<Bohan:> And then he realized the weight of what had been delivered and came to rest in his arms would have to be left behind. Everything grew heavy along with the truth of both of their worlds coming to rest on his shoulders. His arms shifted Gabriel accepting there would be no stirring of tiny limbs or wincing of eyes. The release of the tiny bundle left his arms cold and his heart fragmented into such a state of disrepair that he felt broken. Acceptance of the loss didn’t always bring understanding. Not for him and not this time. The only part of it he could comprehend is that both of them were gutted by something at work entirely unseen.
His eyes lifted to find the set that seemed to know more about what was taking place than he did. Finally the lips on the face that would be lost in the haze of the grief formed a smile. Just enough to be noticeable beneath the nose that wore the shadow of depth at each side. A little sign of something out there beyond the bone deep ache that seemed reach through into their veins, their flesh that otherwise hurt like hell to move. But finally he did. He had to. Minutes bled into hours while he did.
The warmth of the hand in his bridging the space between them in the car was the only sign that she was still with him. Darkness replaced the sun that had warmed them on the way in. Street lights lost their glow, traffic lights were without colors and meaning. The names on street signs were lines and blurs that stood for nothing anymore. Arrows flashing pointed to nowhere. Nowhere that he could reach. The loss seemed to consume everything. The faces that looked through the windows of neighboring cars were reminders of how life could turn on a dime and leave him behind.
The click of the mechanisms in the deadbolt released the lock on the apartment door. Slowly it opened with the movement of a hand that was numb to the surface beneath it. The scent of her beneath his wrapped and protective arm was strikingly different. He would not tell her that the changes were noticeable at even the most subtle levels. Not yet. Maybe never. His jaw tightened as his arm brought her in a little closer and guided her in. The eclectic industrial decor was the perfect place to bring her. Sterile and open with only the tolerable reminders of the elements they could still identify with. Stone, earth tones and othewise void of life. He didn’t even have a houseplant requiring care. The spare room that was devoted to Gabriel was closed off from view thankfully to the door being closed. The bag carrying their combined clothing and miscellaneous items was placed on the floor as he closed the door once they were both inside.
Bohan was home and yet felt so lost as he stood there in silence allowing Ainsley to adjust to what was around her. Most likely it was everything she didn’t expect to see so soon. They were supposed to take Gabriel home together to her place. Yes. The hardest part was yet to come. Words would happen when the time was right. As if it could ever really be. The sounds of metal clinking echoed as he placed his keys on the gray soapstone counter. His cellphone followed suit as he dropped it next to the souvenir key chain from their 2014 trip to Ibiza with their sister. Curious callers wouldn’t be a distraction. The phone was shut off hours ago. Anyone calling to congratulate or get updates would have to wait. Perhaps indefinitely. Their sister was on her way once she got her own affairs settled. Bohan counted on her to make up for whereever he may fall short with Ainsley and the grief.
“I am just going to grab some things out of my room.” He leaned over and kissed her head then disappeared through the open door to do just that.
Bohan took the picture frames waiting for the first baby pictures and tucked them in the top of his closet under folded bedding and extra pillows were pulled out. A quick tug of the large canvas with what he imagined gracing Gabriel’s nursery walls was flipped and stuffed back against the wall of the modest walk in closet.He shifted his winter jackets to hang in the space to conceal everything else that quickly piled up considered unfit for her viewing until she was ready. Arms full of miscellaneous and general items of consistent need was with him as he returned to the living room.
“Give me a few more minutes and I will change the sheets.” He dropped everything on an oversized chair with a handy matching chocolate ottoman. “You thirsty?” He opened the refrigerator door and was reminded bottled water, vegetables and grapefruit juice is nearly all he seemed to exist on if his fridge was any indication. “Ice water?”
Bohan closed the stainless steel fridge door and pulled open the side by side freezer door. It had empty trays and no ice. He allowed the cold flow of freezing air to be cut off with the door being pressed back into place with a slow defeating sigh. So much for being the perfect host. He looked at her. He was tempted to offer to order take out but he was confident eating wasn't the first thing on her mind. He wanted to apologize for what he didn't really know. He wanted to say something but there were no words. Instead he made his way back to her and found her fingers with his own. Gently he brushed their hold down to her fingertips hoping to say with the connection and contact what couldn't possibly be put into words.