Path of the Vampire forum

OOC wrote: This is written in the form of an internet blog that no one except those that Madison gives explicit access to can take this information IC....which means no one unless stated later on.

April 18th, 2014

So...here goes I guess.

Made this blog completely private. Well, as private as it seems they'll let you make a blog. But there's not a goddamn person on this planet that I'll put on this reader list and I'm hoping that the amount of hoops I jumped through will keep any hackers from tracking this down. Last thing I need is some Masquerade-Is-The-Only-Way-To-Live jerkoff reading this and using it as a reason to send me on a vacation back to no-man's land.

Talked to Lan a few hours ago or so now. It was awkward.

I'm sick of hearing "If I could....but I can't..."

Ninety-nine percent of the time that really means "but I won't" or "I don't feel like trying".

I don't even know why I even bother with him sometimes.

Maybe because he's the only one that hasn't broken my trust....that I know about.

Or because he's the only one who calls me, as few and far between as that is. Or stops to talk to me if he happens to pass by me wherever he is.

Not that I do either of those things for much of anyone except maybe Alex.

I guess I shouldn't say he's the only one who does those things. Alex does.

What I should say is he's the only member of d'Artois who gives half a ****.

And that's really what it is. Half a ****.

Don't get me wrong. I like Lan. Most of the time. I really do. But sometimes it's like he lives in a world with blinders on. As long as he can see the world through his rose tinted glasses and ignore all the ugliness and ********, that's all that matters.

He seems to have forgotten the time he got all up in arms that no one would help me when Tytonidae was hunting me and then when he had the chance to do something, he flaked.

But that seems to be the case with most vampires I meet. All bravado and nothing to back it up unless they can get enough of their friends to outnumber the person challenging them.

I'm failing to see how this writing **** was supposed to make me happier.

If anything it just makes me want to stab something more.

Maybe it'll take a few more posts to get to what's really wrong with me.

I doubt it.

I haven't kept a journal since I was like twelve.

It's just something for someone to find and use against you.

Not that people in this town need actual evidence or facts to mark you as an enemy.

I thought Harper Rock was a ****-hole when I was alive.

It's even worse now that I'm a vampire.

And I can't even get high.

This is ********.

What the **** am I going to title this thing?

I really should have gone with a paper journal and just burned the pages after writing them.

April 19th, 2014

Saw Nelle in the raid today.

She did that little sorcerer thing that puts a pep in my step which was nice.

I like her.

Not in that way.

She's a good tenant. And it's nice being able to call on her on occasion to work her mojo on me. I always feel like I could stay awake forever by the time she's done.

She never charges me either but I did give her one of those Sanguivore's Bane thingies. The little relic that turns her blood to poison to vampires. I know Brick loves his.

Speaking of, I should probably have him do a round of hacking. Haven't found any relics at all lately but I haven't really been looking. I could use the cash though.

Getting all the permits and contracts ready for breaking ground come May (hopefully) has been tapping me dry. Well mostly the lawyer that's managing all of it.

By the end of summer, I should be out of this ****-hole.

Maybe I should make Nelle an offer to come with me.

April 19th, 2014

I learned a lesson today.

Only trust those that you have magically forced into servitude.

Pi passed by me a bit ago.

Told me Elliot's been talking to her and that we should talk.

Cuz that's really going to make me feel better.

If she wanted to talk, she should have stuck around.

I'm not ******* going to hunt her down.

I have nothing to say to her.

Or Elliot either anymore for that matter.

April 19th, 2014

******* Ripper.

Note to self: Shoot Ripper in the throat.

Doc profited it from it in the end I guess. Since some stupid Mooncalf got the best of me.

I should have just tomed to Den.

April 20th, 2014

Doc's weird.

That is all.

Wait.

Happy Zombie Jesus Necrophelia Day.

Now that is all.

April 20th, 2014

Ripper is going to die.

Shot him once and walked away.

He came around and tried to fight me to the death and then ended up running away like a *****.

This should be fun.

April 29th, 2014

I'm 'dead' again.

Have been for over a week now.

Haven't bothered writing. Trying to use powers gives me headaches here.

But it's not so bad when I'm near a thinning in the veil.

Last time I was dead, I found a window or two where I could see grass and people. It frustrated me then. It's a bit more comforting now.

There's lots more now.

I found a huge tear. Too long for me to find the end of but not thin enough to let me out.

The other spirits here seem to like them too.

Makes for easy pickings.

I don't feel like myself yet.

Maybe I should stay awhile.

April 30th, 2014

I thought the veil had repaired itself while I rested.

But I guess I just didn't realize how far off I walked away from the tear.

I don't know why but I almost panicked when I couldn't find it.

When I couldn't see the grass in all the bleakness.

I didn't like that feeling.

I stuck closer to it this time when I went hunting.

I don't know why I wondered off the other day...night? I don't remember. Other spirits really seem to like it near the tears too.

It's actually gotten worse.

Another tear has started off the big one I found.

I followed that one just now.

It's weird seeing buildings in the realm.

It makes me want to go home.

I still don't feel good.

May 2nd, 2014

All the tears in the realm are gone.

Seems the shadow realm can heal itself faster than I do.

But Cartis came to see me.

Twice actually.

Was nice of him.

Doc is a dick.

Sent me an email about why I haven't returned yet.

I didn't tell him I haven't tried.

After what happened last time, don't see a point in trying when I still don't feel myself.

Maybe soon though.

Maybe.

May 7th, 2014

I came out of the realm Sunday morning before dawn. Got lucky that it wasn't like noon or something.

Found a raid the other day.

Had some stupid **** steal a spirit from me when I was summoning them for myself.

If she had just asked, I would have bled for one without problem.

But she didn't ask.

So I shot her ***** *** in the heart.

She tried to shoot back but missed and decided to dispel Adrian instead and cursed me a few times.

I mind-blocked the bint and that was the last of that....so far.

Killed one of those crazy magic bitches at the top of a raid though.

Last time a group of us went after one of those, it took forever.

This time, I was the second person to have a go at her and I killed that *****!

It felt awesome.

On top of all that.

I think we're going to break ground soon on renovating that ruined mansion I cut through red tape to purchase.

Things are looking up.