: Things I wish I could say : Lelantos

[Enver Marshall II]

Recipient: Lelantos
Sender: Enver Marshall II
Subject: Things I wish I could say

Message:

Dollface,

Thought about writing you instead of emailing you, but mail might take a while and I might be back by then. Anyways, I got here a few hours ago and already found myself bombarded by Emilee. That's my mom. You might like her, even if she's got a few quirks to her.

Being here has made me realize some things. Even though we've got time on our hands, there are things I'd do differently. I'm just not real sure what that means and how different things would be today if I could do it all over again. That's food for thought for a different time and place.

That's our song and dance though, isn't it? Different time, different place and still can't stand still long enough to say the **** we should say to the other. Not until it might be too late or it is too late.

If you need help getting a new sword, when I get back I'll help you get one. In my haste I forgot to add that in my last email before I had to head out. I think I left the coffee pot on in the kitchen. Could you turn it off for me? If not, see if Hannah could, if she hasn't already. She's always under foot, so she's probably done it by now.

I've got to get back to Emilee. Things don't get done by themselves.

Stay safe, Doll.

Love,

E.

[Enver Marshall II]

Recipient: Lelantos
Sender: Marshall Studios
Subject: Things I wish I could say

Message:

Doll,

Sending you a quick message. Hoping things are going alright for you there in Harper Rock.

I'm sitting here behind a desk in my old man's studio. Most the people have gone home for the night by now. I've got an office all to myself right now. Save the janitor that's emptying the garbage. Everything feels familiar here, but it should after twenty some odd years, I guess.

Sometimes I think about you. Just you. Not me, not you and me, just you. Like right now, or when I'm poured over some paper in my old man's chair. And I think about the times I've held you back. About the times that I still might be holding you back. The times I've been selfish. I'm sorry for that.

Emilee told me that absence makes the heart grow fonder, but I've sort of come to look at things retrospectively. Maybe it's just the change of the scenery.

Hope you're alright. I'm not going to write for a while. I don't want to spam your inbox or have you getting notices on your phone when you're doing whatever it is you're doing. I'm done holding you back.

E.

[Lelantos]

Recipient: Enver Marshall II
Subject: Things I wish I could say

Message:

A song and dance is what you make it, what you put into it. Sometimes we are too different, and so we stumble, but we've hung in there, barely, but we're still here, and we will continue to do so. I don't hold back anything I have to say, but if there is something on your chest, perhaps it would help you to relieve yourself of the burden of whatever it is.

Haven't we had this discussion? When we set down things we wanted. Since then, you haven't held me back, things have changed, for the better. Or so I had thought, but from these messages, I gather an entirely different feeling from you.

I always thought our differences were good, part of what held and attracted us to each other, but as of late, it seems to be having the opposite affect. Why do you think that has changed? You had always been endeared by my nature, you knew what I was, what I did, you even part-took in that violence a few times. Don't you recall our spars? Where did it all change?

I had hoped you would spend your time having a break, or at least enjoying yourself. Not thinking about what failures we've been within our marriage. I said to you before you left, I'll be here when you get back, so will our problems, and so will our need to work on them.

Relax a little. You deserve it, and lord knows you need it. I'm not going any where. I'll be home when you decide to return.

- love, L.[/quote]

[Enver Marshall II]

Recipient: Lelantos
Sender: Marshall Studios
Subject: RE: Things I wish I could say

Message:

Dollface,

I'm not thinking about our failures, I'm thinking about our futures. I could see how it might come across differently. But since you brought it up: I remember the moment I fell in love with you.

We had been doing some back and forth online, but that wasn't when. It wasn't until the cage match. I still grin thinking how irritated you were that this nobody with a big mouth and ego gave you a run for your money and then you were a good sport about it. We've not done anything like that for a long while, not that I think I could stand a chance against you anymore. We've been training on different things and truth is I can't shoot a gallon of milk off a counter anymore due to all the times I've died. I probably couldn't even give a decent punch either. I'm not blaming anyone, or anything about that, it's just a cold hard fact.

We need to have more fun. The city's gotten too serious for the both of us. Maybe when I get back we can work on that.

I know you told me to have some fun before I left and this isn't something I should put over an email, but we don't have much of a choice. My old man's sitting in ICU right now while I'm trying to sort things for Emilee and the company before I head back home. Emilee's going to pull the plug on him sometime in the next few days, as he's brain dead. Don't feel the need to say anything about it, he and I weren't close for a good few years. Maybe even longer. Since I'm a share holder, Emilee and Abigail (that's a story for later) too, we have to do some things here with a lawyer first before we can do that and then do what we want or need to with our shares. I'm just not sure what I want to do with my share. Keeping it means making money, but also means trips once a month back here. Selling it might look bad and I'm not sure Emilee wants me to abandon it completely. She'll probably need my help and some direction for a while.

Once that's sorted, I've got that favor with that guy I told you about and then maybe I can start to enjoy myself like you wanted me to. You're always welcome to visit, if you want to. If not, I'd understand. There's a lot going on everywhere for everyone.But if you could manage it, I'd get us a real nice place on the coast.

If not this time, maybe another time.

Love,

E.

[Lelantos]

Recipient: Enver Marshall II
Sender: Lelantos
Subject: RE: Things I wish I could say

Message:

That was quite a while ago, wasn't it? Things were easier, I think we were different. Perhaps that's our problem, we've changed, we aren't the people we once loved. I think the question you need to ask yourself, are you in love with me now, even through these changes? I know my answer.

Fun. At this point, a foreign concept. We haven't had fun in a while. It's rare when we do. Another thing we lost, along with ourselves. I miss when we used to just spar for fun, whether you could beat me or not, or if I could you. It was about enjoying the thrill of it, and then just laying together after and laughing. It became too serious when we sparred, angry, upsetting.

I am sorry about your father, if I knew of a way to help, I would attempt it. As for your shares, keep them. It's part of your family, part of you. Whilst it isn't desirable to always travel down once a month, you should hold onto something like that.

I'm going away for a while, to the woods, a cabin perhaps, so I don't know how well my reception is going to be, but I'll try to reply if you message me, or even send you one. Things have happened, stuff that's made me think, made me realize a lot I didn't see before. But suffice to say, I think I'm finally done with Ty after this last thing. There are just some things you can't fix, and the damage that was created with this, is one of those.

So I'm done for a while, hence the cabin. Perhaps I'll take you on that offer of popping down to see you, have Hannah sort out the details? Sunshine is something I miss from home, it would be nice to be bathed in it for once.

Anyways, I'll see you eventually.

-Love, L.

[Enver Marshall II]

Recipient: Lelantos
Sender: Marshall Studios
Subject: Re: Re: Things I wish I could say

Message:

Dollface,

It's sorted. There's a plane ticket at the airport for a flight in two nights time. You'll have to show some ID to claim it, but it shouldn't be hard to do. Be there by seven, the flight leaves at ten past eight. You'll land a little after four in the morning, the next day, but we can sleep in.

I hope that answers everything.

Love,

E.

[Enver Marshall II]

Recipient: Lelantos
Sender: Marshall Studios
Subject: Re: Re: Things I wish I could say

Message:

Doll,

I'm not expecting a reply, I'm not even sure you'll get this in time. Hannah has something for you to bring down when you come. Don't leave before seeing her, shes expecting your text. She'll drive you to the airport if you need it too.

I'll be at the airport when you get here. Don't think I said that in the last email. I got us a place by the ocean, like I promised.

I'll see you soon.

Love,

E.