Path of the Vampire forum

OOC Preface: All of the following journal entries are written in English for the ease of reading and writing. The character herself writes these entries in Spanish as a mechanism of keeping her thoughts and observations private if found by strangers. This should in no way be taken as public knowledge.

27 June 2011

Much has happened since my encounter with Shan over a month ago now, which is why I've forgotten to write about my journeys until now. While I can't say I am certain if I am totally happy with my choice presently, I will say that I think what has occurred to my person is most interesting and wonderful. I have come to learn that she and I are both vampires, and that we must take every precaution to hide ourselves from the larger population of the human species. It is like I evolved overnight and all of my senses, strength, finesse and everything, became more finely tuned. I've been able to take quite the advantage of these things already and I feel I could be quite the assassin compared to my former self.

It is almost as if i am a living part of a shadow now, those things that kept me so very close while watching countless marks in alleys or in bars. Strangely enough I noticed while standing under a street lamp, that I seem to have lost my shadow some where. I also discovered that if I try to look in a mirror, I don't show up. That gave me such a fright when I woke up on the third day or so and I went to wash up in the little apartment I was squatting in. It's been hard to learn how to fine tune my grooming without being able to watch myself do it, but I think I'm getting the hang of it. It was explained to me by Shan that sunlight will burn me terribly, and I noticed once when I went to go out right near sunset that my skin tingled. Perhaps I am more sensitive to the light because I am made of darkness now? I have no idea... I'm learning as I go along.

But I've learned enough to put some thought into opening a guild for shadow people like myself. I think I might offer some services in tracking, breaking and entering, and perhaps a service to put people in touch with assassins. Its still a rough idea but we all need to work together to learn about our skills, especially if they are just as lost as I am at times. I don't know where I'd be with out Miss Velveteen.

I will take some time soon to write down some about the fantastic tricks I've learned, but for now the train is here to take me back to Honeymead Station.

28 June 2011

I like these little cafes I find all around town, I just wish I was able to get a cup of coffee. It smells so great in here, but when I tried to enjoy some a few weeks ago I got suddenly sick. Same thing happened when I tried a biscotti the next night. It seems that I've lost my appetite for all but the vitae of the creatures I feed on, and the thirst doesn't ever seem to leave me for long. I hope this soon corrects itself, as a life with out coffee would be most awful. I suppose I could adapt and dine on humans that recently drank coffee or whatever else I am craving.

I should write about the most profound thing I learned since I was brought into this life by Shan. About ten days ago, Cobb attacked me as we chased each other near the Lotus Cafe. When his knife sliced my arm open, blood didn't drip all over the pavement. Instead, this black viscous liquid ran out and dissipated as if smoke on the wind. My skin also didn't scab over and take weeks to heal up either. The skin simply faded back into existence over a few days. I could put my hand in the wound the first night but see where the skin was coming back, but it wasn't solid yet. It was kind of awesome!

I need to purchase a Silencer program, security is already tracing me. More later.

1 July 2011

Kacee and Velveteen have been so kind to provide me with residences or safe havens in which I can shelter in during the day. I don't think I will have the finances to purchase my own dwelling for some time. These two ladies have been more family to me then Shan has been, and I've not seen her in nearly two weeks. They've taught me a lot of neat little tricks, and I've discussed a few of my business ideas with them, even though I am fearful they may never get off the ground. They both seem very supportive, but it is always so hard to tell. Velveteen seems enthusiastic to include me in some of her things too. I just hope its soon, I really want a better way to get out and know more people here. I know there are night clubs and bars, but I hate going alone when I never know anyone there, always have.

I'm getting a bit better at manipulating the shadows though. After much experimentation and concentration, I've been able to wrap the shadows around my person and seemingly vanish from sight. I can only hold it that way for a little while though before it dissipates. I wonder what else I might be able to do as I better refine my control over this. I've been able to walk across the creeks and rivers in town as well, but by what force I don't understand. Perhaps I am lighter then water because I am made of shadows more then of blood?

Gotta get back to the Morgue though, sun is coming quickly.

P.S: Mr. Cobb was killed today. Pretty sure the alert dropped 2%. I think this brings a good omen, provided he stays among the shadows. God willing of course.

20 July 2011

I've not had the time to write for some time. The announcement of the Enforcement Act and my subsequent successful aspiration to be appointed to the position of Captain of the Enforcement Agency. I struck a business deal with one of the other candidates, Mak, who has been statistically studying the bounty list for awhile. This was seen as a good partnership and we got the job. If everything works out as we hope, he will deal more with the bureaucratic aspects of the job and I will handle the day to day affairs of the squad and the punishment of the masquerade breakers.

Recruiting has been slow going as I expected. Not everyone is nearly as passionate about this sort of thing as me and Mak appear to be, but so far so good. I've been spending a lot of my spare time networking with people and strengthening my connections. Mak and I are both not well known, so it is a bit to our disadvantage. Lot of thought going to how to handle situations with fugitives trying to hide in private homes and how to best handle owners so they aren't attacking us every five minutes while were trying to do our job and make an honest living. People are going to be angry I think no matter how I play it.

I've still not heard from Shan. I've even let my knife say hello four times, and it appears she has slept through it all four times. I do not even understand how that is possible. I got stabbed in the gut the other night, and I assure you that it hurt like a *****. It frustrates me that I've grown in such leaps and bounds and she hasn't cared a damn to say a word. if she's even noticed that I am stronger then her now.

At least Velveteen has adopted me as one of her own. I am extremely thankful for her, the rest of the Tytonidae group, and the few other friends I have - they have helped me so much in my sire's absence. So much so that I feel able enough to pass my knowledge on to another. I created my first childe of the night, my "hand selected accident," as Tali and I joked about him. His name is Sylvain, and so far he seems to be surviving, but very quiet. I need to make a point of cornering him this week and teaching him some things.

Speaking of one of these friends, it seems I have an admirer. I am intrigued by him, but it is really hard for me to tell if I have a strong attraction for him. On one hand, he understands me well because we are of a similar background and are of the same path. However, he gives me lots of mixed signals, and acts very differently in public then he does around me. These are things that are very off putting to me, because it makes me confused as to what is his real self. I've decided to just allow it just be for now, and see what will develop. No sense in rushing it, as all I have is time.

Hopefully it won't be that long before I revisit this journal again.

27 July 2011

It has taken me some time to be able to really come to terms with and write about this, but not two days after I last wrote about my gentleman friend, my fate was changed. The shadows decided they wanted him back and he was wiped from existence it seems. No trace of him to be found. Perhaps it is an inherent danger for those of us made up as the same thing that the Shadow Realm supposedly is made of.

I am angry because I lost someone who really understood me, and have no answers for it. Much exactly like I have with Shan. I have no understand of why she has done this to me only to leave me lost while she sleeps. it is no matter she will be embracing shadow soon enough. Or why perhaps a lot of people clamored so much for something to be done about the Hounds, but now won't actively do anything against them. These are confusing times I find myself in.

I hope for peace to come in the days that follow - it would be a nice change of pace.

31 July 2011

The governmental hiatus, or shut down as I like to call it, has left me in an awful spot. I thought I was doing the right thing by informing the public, about what was going on. Perhaps they don't appreciate my humor or understand that I don't really like big brother either. But that is because those who are kicking me while down, really don't know me. No, I take that back, Kacee does. Her backing the bus up right up over me hurts most of all. Quite the band-wagoner she is becoming. People just don't understand that I don't have an issue with what the Hounds are doing, it is a matter of their execution of matters at times.

I will have to find a new source of employment, as I am certain the Council will never have my agency back. Not now. It could allow me to pursue things at the guild more thoroughly. As I was banned from higher leadership because of my other job, the Caste may provide a better home. God only knows the Hellhounds won't take me, not that I think I want them.

I however have been wrong before. I will see what little sister thinks of the experience, as me and she simply grow closer. I am sorry for her. Her sire threw her out the moment she learned of her affiliation with the Hounds. I am glad I gave her a chance to talk, as it all will be fine in the end. Least I can count her among those who care about me, and won't put the knife in my back while I'm not looking.

10 Aug 2011

I am really still at a loss for what to make of recent events.

Mercedes was tossed out of the Docere linage in an unceremonious heap for mocking Staus publicly as well as speaking out against the sacraments that comprise the new laws and guidelines of the reformed council. She then gave me an earful because she thought I sold her out, but later apologized. I haven't heard from her since, but I do hope she thrives as she moves forward in her new life. I do miss my talks with her though...just as much as I miss Ombrata.

The attacks on the Grigori turned out to be much more then I had anticipated, and I am uncertain if I will be participating as we move forward further. One young man died that I am uncertain as to why, he wasn't nearly as hypocritical as the others. Rocklin also was included in the attacks, not that I mind in the least. I am convinced that he was using Velveteen, and that he judged me based on my job instead of getting to know me. Perhaps it will learn him a lesson.

I am slowly getting the feel for the new Enforcers and have gotten some policies and guidelines together. People seem to be a little slow to read the notices, but I'm sure it'll get better. The Hellhound presence worries several people including myself. I am willing to give them a chance but their actions need to do the talking. It is intriguing all the same how they can be throwing me and the organization and council under the bus one minute and then be all for it the next. Time will tell.

The experiences with the Enforcers start-up have brought me several new friends, ones that I wasn't expecting to make in all of this. It is nice to have that sort of surprise once in awhile. Perhaps fate is adjusting itself for screwing up earlier. Would be nice to catch a break as Shan is long gone, and Velveteen is all I seem to really have.

17 Aug 2011

To quote Chicago: You can look right through me, walk right by me, and never know I'm there.

I don't know what has happened. It is like after everything has been going so well and i was making such friends, and learning to enjoy life again, it has ground to an abrupt halt. I think because I refuse to take sides in the massive verbal arguments and sparring that is going on at all corners now, I have become just what I am. A shadow along the wall. It's really depressed me so much to know that unless I go to people, the only person that will come say hi is Velveteen. I thought many others cared more about me more. I hardly even left the sewer yesterday, but I am strong I will figure it out.

(OOC: Backdated cause I was really busy the last few days. I am using creative license to describe what I saw, but I am trying to not write Shan.)

18 Aug 2011

I never had expected us to actually finish it. I went to the back of The Lounge tonight, as I had made my habit since Shan fell asleep back there. We'd all been visiting her in her sleep, though I was doing so most frequently. I am convinced that Killers are nearly immune to death with how many bullets, stab wounds, and attacks by the shadows she took. I think she may have startled out of her sleep as she faced me as I cocked my gun and leveled it at her from my shadows. The sound of the gun discharging is still ringing in my ears.

When I opened my eyes, I saw her on the floor. There wasn't anymore blood, but there also seemed to be nothing else either. I crouched next to her and peeled back her eyes, and saw that there was no movement at all. She was gone. I hurried out of there and into the familiar comforts of the sewers. I can't say I cried, or particularly mourned the event as much as feel it is bittersweet.

I am unsure if she possesses the strength and vigor to return to us, though I hope that she does. I only spoke to her a few times and I really want to better know the woman who brought me into this life. I am however relieved as I feel lessened of a burden. She abandoned me here with little a care for it, and I am glad that punishment has been brought. It makes me even more thankful to have Velveteen, for without her its possible my fate could be the same as my sire's.

I think I'm gonna take it easy for tonight and tomorrow, let it settle with my soul a bit. It's good to have a break from simmering rage.

5 Sept 2011

Its been a very busy last half month with trying to get the agencies policies on hunting bounties tweaked. I am going to release the new laws and with how everyone is bounty sensitive I think they will be very well received. People fail to grasp that it is the sum total of those on the list that causes the alert to be high, not just the higher outliers. I'm also finding myself exceedingly frustrated with those who are in the organization and hunting those with served warrants and not talking to me first. A lot of communication could really go a long way.

But even in the last week I don't find myself thinking about work, or sharpening my skills. It's really a who. I fear a bit that I might be reading too much into the closeness shared or what I think of it, but its the most at peace I've felt with someone since Ombrata. I enjoy his company and the closeness shared doesn't make me skiddish. We are two of a kind, which is something I notice a lot about some of us shadows. But we'll see what happens. I am scared to make more of a move as the phrase goes lest I look silly and awkward. Maybe next time I'll try.