I'm not who you think I am... ~Journal~

[Kira]

Kira: Let's be lazy and just post the same thing in both journals.
Dru: Sounds good

July 22nd, 2013

Kira moved through the temple in the white and gold accented dress, gathering the items needed for the Full Moon ritual. She placed salt, a container of water, incense, a silver and then a gold candle, her wand, her athame. Candles for the quarters and a cauldron, which was her personal one with the triple moon on it.

Dru headed inside the temple, she was still learning but she was interested to learn what her sister was interested in. She never really believed in much before and she still didn't. Her life was always comics, fashion, makeup and boys. Maybe she could talk Kira into coming to a comic convention sometime.. She got to the back of the temple and blinked, "Was I suppose to wear something special?" she asked. "You look really different by the way.."

Kira titled her head towards her sister. "One can have ritual clothes but no, you didn't need to wear anything special. I just...reconnecting to my priestess past." she said, she waved her over. "I wrote you a copy of what I'm doing. I'm a little rusty but it should be fine."

Dru looked over the items on the altar. "Did you make that wand?" she asked, before looking over the paper she was handed.

"Yeah...always best to make your own." Kira said, "Suppose that could be another custom item I could make at the shop though." she said, it was best to make your own runes as well but she did make them for other people. "Now I know you don't know much about this. This ritual is for the triple goddesses in general. There are a few. The few I feel more personal towards are Brigid which is why I already have a flame going. Hecate, which is why I have a key on the altar. Isis, The Morrígan...well just a name a few anyway." she said. "This ritual also brings the male gods, but I don't have any personal attach to any of them yet. I guess it must be all that time spent as a priestess for the goddess Brigid but both aspects should be covered."

"Sis...far too much information at once." Dru said sheepishly. She had a feeling she could talk about this stuff for a long time.

"Oh, heh sorry." Kira said with a smirk. "Right, take it slow. Alright, so please stand over there since its just the two of us. Remember when I talked about ground and center, please do that." she said before doing it herself. "I cast this circle with love and in trust in mind. May only the powers that wish us well enter." she moved her hand in a circle. "The circle is cast."

As animals would do, Sof moved around them wanting to see what was going on. Kira was ready for such a distraction and had a soft chair off to the side for her to sit and watch what was going on.

Kira held up the bowl of salt. "May this salt be purified to be fit to for this work. In the name of the Goddess, in the name of the God, I consecrate this salt." She held up the water next, repeating the same. She lit the center candle, the incense, and the red candle.

She sprinkled the salt, starting at North. "With the power of Earth I purify this space." she went on to the Water, repeating it for the power of Water. Next incense was moved around the circle for the power of Air. Then the red candle for the power of Fire.

Next was calling the Quarters and the Invocations.

"We honor you Goddess in your three forms, on this night of the full moon.
May our connection to you deepen.
May we continue to grow stronger under your watchful care.
May our understanding of you grow."

Kira lit the other silver candle to let it burn out in the cauldron.

She looked up at Dru. "Now we mediate for a moment." she said, closing her eyes.

Kira then lit the white candle for the Maiden.
"Maiden of youth, we are uncertain of the steps we take. May you help us along the way.
May we find joy in our path, to smile and dance. Help us as we go on into the future."

She lit the red for the Mother.
"Mother Goddess, giver of life. Grant us the simple gifts and pleasures. We feel you all around us as nature springs to life. May we find the connection to nature and grow closer to you."

She lit the black candle for the crone.
"Elder goddess, the wise one. Help teach us new things. The seasons change, the days grow dark but you will always be by our side. Hold us close as we walk our path."

"We Meditate again, anything you need to say out loud or within yourself." Kira said softly.

Dru had been watching carefully of all the things that Kira did. What did she want? She wasn't sure. She didn't have hope that family would work out, which was why she liked them both being in Misfits, people had to care more about each other there then the families they tried to be in before. She wished she had known their sire better before she left.

Kira extinguish the candles of the triple goddesses and told Dru that they now would have to decharge, all that extra energy needed to be returned.

"Loving and wise Goddess, thank you for joining us on this night. Stay if you will, go if you must. Hail and farewell." she extinguish the Goddess candle and went down the closing of the God, the Quarters. She picked up the athame and took down the circle.

"The circle is open but unbroken. May the peace and love of the circle stay in our hearts as we go on our way. Merry meet, and merry part and merry meet again." Kira finished, Sof jumped off and ran after a bug.

"Well, that was kind of a long but not like church." Dru said with a smile, moving off to the sitting area in the corner.

Kira walked off after her, sitting next to her. "Yeah there are a lot of steps. But that's for a full ritual like that. If you wanted to do one just yourself, there are quicker one." she said.

"That was quite interesting."

Both their wraiths decided to show up in front of them.

"****!" Kira hissed, throwing a pillow at her own which went right through it. "You're gone this whole damn time and you do that! If I was human, I'd have a heart attack.." she said, sulking.

Dru's eyes were wide. "You two...did that...planned it." she said, she had moved back on the lounge chair. She agreed with the heart attack comment. Her wraith was laughing before crawling up the wall beside them.

"He's rather freaky but I couldn't pass up a good entrance like that." Mark replied, "But yes I'm back." he added, floating closer.

Kira shook her head, eyeing the mutant wraith of her sister's. "I need to watch this X-Men show to understand what the hell you see in that thing." she said.

Dru perked up. "Read the comics first!" she said, tackling her sister.

"Hell...what did I just say." Kira muttered.

[Kira]

July 24th, 2013

Kira felt better after the full moon ritual, she tried to hold onto that...feeling. It was fleeting however, the balance that had been there was leaving her. She closed her eyes, it had taken forever for her to go back to normal the last time her heart had been taken out. She hoped it wouldn't take just as long this time. She tried to focus on reverting herself back, was that the right word to use? Close enough anyway. She chanted all damn morning without a result.

I am a Warrior, true and free
I am a Woman as strong as can be
I am a Daughter, standing proud
I am a Mother, singing out loud
I am all Woman, Goddess hear me
I am all Woman, we all shall be free!

Not that she was a mother, she would never know the world, the same went could be true of daughter. It was a nice chant, not of her own making, she had found it, connected to it but it failed her none-the-less. She was on her own.

Kira's hands were absent mindlessly making the base of runes, lost in thought.

"Kira.."

She didn't hear whoever was calling her name. Her green eyes weren't focused on anything as her hands worked the clay.

"Kira..?"

"Kira!"

Kira blinked with a slight jump. She looked up from the table. "Huh?"

Puppet sighed, "You were out in space or something..." he said.

"I've been right here.." Kira said before looking down at the clay, surprised at the number of runes she made.

"That's not what I meant and you know it." Puppet replied.

"Did you want something?" Kira asked as she put the round runes onto wax paper before stacking them off to the side so she could put runes on them, right now they were all blank. She then washed her hands.

"I need...your help with something." Puppet said unsure of how to say it.

Kira turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow. "My help?" she asked. "With what exactly?"

Dave paused for a moment before blurting it out. "I want you to get rid of my sister's boyfriend." he said.

Kira stared at him, not sure if she heard him right. "Get rid of him? Like...kill him?" she asked.

"Well...yeah, I mean, if it comes to that.." Dave said, "You can try scaring him or putting him under some spell, something."

Kira leaned her back against the counter. "Man, thought you had all brothers. Now you tell me you have a sister. You got a big family." she said.

"Never mind that!" Dave said irritated.

"Alright alright, calm down. What is his crime?" Kira asked, crossing her arms.

"Treats her like crap...beats her, cheats on her. He's no good but she's scared to leave him. She's tried before." Dave explained.

"You know I'm not my...let's fight self right now. Bad timing if you wanted the side of me that would just kill him..." Kira said, she adverted her eyes. "But fine...where does he stay?"

"He normally crashes at my sister's place.." Dave replied, his brothers were all over the place and they had tried to take care of this before but the man had too many gangster friends to back him up. "He's a gangster if it makes you feel any better."

Kira smirked, "We need a time where he isn't home. Get your sister out of the house, let the man come home to me. I'll take care of it.." she said.

"Thank you." Dave said, giving Kira a big hug.

"Put me down." Kira complained, she still didn't like the idea of being touched right now. When he set her down, she pushed him back.

"Aw, I thought you'd be the cuddly Kira.." Dave said but made sure to back up in case she wanted to hit him.

"There is no cuddly Kira. Unless I'm in my cat form." Kira replied, "Go get this set up before I change my mind."

Dave nodded and quickly left the house.

Kira sighed softly, she wasn't sure if she was up to this but she felt like she owed him.

[Kira]

July 25th, 2013

They decided that Dave needed to be there with the van so they could take this scum that beat his sister away. His sister was out for the day but the man would soon be coming by the house. Kira sat in the passenger seat, tightening the laces on her fingerless gloves that went halfway up her arms. "So what's this little prick's name?" Kira asked as they sat outside the house now.

"Leroy.." Dave replied, handing her the key to get inside. "You going to be alright doing this?"

Kira didn't look at him, she was staring at the house, tapping the key against one of her rings. "This isn't a complicated plan. If you wanted me to torture him, now that I wouldn't be able to do so well at the moment." she said, pulling the handle for the van door and slid out onto the ground. "Just keep the van going. Not sure if I'll be dragging him out or luring him out.." she said before closing the door. She hurried across the street, unlocked the door and waited around the corner of the hallway.

The waiting was the problem, even with being mellower than she normally was didn't mean she had the patience of a saint. Finally she heard the front door open, it shut with a force behind it. "*****, where's my beer! I told you to be ready with it when I got here!"

Kira grinned. "Show time.." she whispered, stepping out into the hallway. "What? No, honey I'm home?" she said, tilting her head.

The man looked surprised but soon his eyes trailed up and down. "Who, are you?" he asked. "Are you a friend of Maria's? She sure didn't say anything about you." he added with a grin and started to come towards her.

"No, I don't know her. I'm a friend of one of her many brothers.." Kira said, her eyes darkened as he reached a hand towards her. She grabbed his hand and snapped it back, listening to the bones cracking in protest and he cried out. "It's time for a woman to have the upper hand on you. Think of me as karma." she whispered in his ear as he whimpered. He went to punch her with his working hand even though she still had a hold of his other while he had sank to his knees. Kira rewarded him with a kick to the chest, letting go of his hand and kicked downwards on his back.

"Go ahead and try to fight. It just makes it that much more enjoyable for me." Kira said with a smirk. She grabbed him by the arm, pulling him to his feet. "Now...we're going to walk out of here and get into a van. I'm not past breaking every limb you have if you try to run. So please, go ahead and test my patience."

Kira kept a grip on his arm as they made their way to the front door. She closed the door, pretty much the place was left like nothing happened which was what she wanted. She yanked on him towards the van, Dave had moved to the back and opened the door. He got out of the way fast and Kira pushed the man inside. Getting in after him and closed the door.

The man looked to Dave as he went back to the driver seat and took off. "Dave...y-you're behind this! What kind of steroids is the woman on!"

Dave started to laugh. "She isn't on anything. You just met a woman you couldn't beat up and you've touched my sister for the last time. She wanted you out of her life for a long while but you wouldn't listen. Your gang won't be able to help you now." he said.

Kira stared at the man as he looked at her again. She grinned, showing her fangs. He backed up until his back was against the wall of the van. "W-What are you!?" he screamed.

"Just a waking nightmare.." Kira mused, oh she could so **** with his mind with waking nightmare as well. Soon they pulled up to the house. She grabbed his foot and yanked him towards her. She opened the door and grabbed him by the arm again, pulling him along towards the house.

"Are you sure about this?" Dave asked as he followed her, after turning the van off.

"The beasties have to eat. And they don't leave anything behind so...why not." Kira said, not matter if the man tripped and was no longer on his feet, Kira kept dragging him towards the basement door. She opened unlocked all the locks she had on it which was phase one. She shoved him down, he tumbled down the stairs. Kira waited a moment, making sure the fadebeasts hadn't broken free. She went down the stairs, the man was groaning in pain as Kira grabbed him by the back of the shirt and moved him towards the caged off area. The fadebeasts started to growl.

"Have a treat for you." Kira said, she pushed the man against the bars. One of the beasts grabbed a hold of him, pulling him through, the body breaking and bending in ways that it shouldn't. Kira turned around and walked away from the short lived screams. She went up the stairs, closed the door and locked it back up.

"Well its done. Your sister is now safe to live her life." Kira said, handing Dave the key back.

"Thank you, Kira.." Dave said.

"Don't you dare hug me." Kira added quickly before walking off.

Dave shrugged and went back to the van to make sure there wasn't anything that linked them to the man that would now be one of the many missing persons.

[Kira]

August 1st, 2013

Kira moved to the door of the building. She slipped off her high heels and went inside. She pressed her back to the wall as she moved down the hallway. She watched the guard head off, she hurried to the computer. Her green eyes scanned down the list of items in the warehouse. A grin spread across her lips. "Oh I love weapon shipments." she said. She quickly looked for the boxes scattered in the building, unlocking the doors and searching for the good stuff.

The best part was getting out of there without being spotted. She slipped her shoes back on and headed down the steps. She found a place to sit and look at the weapons. Rusty...it might be old. the others were in fine condition however, but not as good as her weapons but still, they would be good in her collection.

Kira got up and stashed the weapons to sort after later before heading onto the next warehouse. This one was as uneventful as the last but when she pulled up the inventory it was different. "Score all the same." she said, it was guns. Unless it was better than her own gun, which she hated using, they would all be sold. She had no interest in a collection of guns.

She quickly made her way to the shop to sell them. She used her powers and got the extra amount before heading towards the bank. She took notice of her balance before heading to pick up the stash and heading home. She placed them on the table to be sorted out later.

[Kira]

August 23rd-25th, 2013

Kira’s eyes were closed, looking at the CrowNet. What were these people on? Supposedly it was supposedly to be a joke…but at a simple glance, it didn’t come across as a joke at all. “The city is going to hell, and not in a good way.” She muttered. She hadn’t been able to make it to the meetings, besides the first one. Thankfully Serenity made great notes. She couldn’t help but laugh at what Alexandrea said. Meaningful relationship. Oh she felt like hitting and yelling at the girl. You had that and you threw it away. Jarrett would be perfect…if only Kira didn’t view him as an older brother type of course. She opened her eyes. She wondered if he was still with his mom, she wouldn’t blame him if he never returned. At least he wasn’t in the shadow realm.

She squirmed, something ran across her feet. She sat up in bed, pulling herself up towards her pillows. She tossed the sheets back and stared at the ferrets. “What are you doing here you little ankle bitters.” She muttered and chased them out. They must have been in here when she closed the door.

---

Kira spent the night running the city in her animal form. She thought it better to be safe while running in the wilderness. What she hadn’t expected was Serenity wanting her to come by the lab to test if the vampire healing still working while in an animal form. That wasn’t her idea of a pleasant evening and lucky enough she didn’t summon her. She wasn’t sure how well she would be able to get away. She was a decent sized cat and she wasn’t sure if one could teleport. Something to test later. She perched up in a tree. She closed her eyes, it was one of the best ways to enjoy nature…when you’re a vampire anyway.

---

Kira was roaming Swansdale when she came across the houses for sale. Going on a tour, it had rooms that the other house didn’t have. And she would own it fully as well. She never got to use any of her place fully the way she wanted it, she always had to put it aside for others. She bit her lower lip, she wasn’t 100% sure if she should though.

There was something within her, telling her to buy the house. She was handed the keys but she just stared at the house. Why…did she buy it? She had plenty of places to crash. She put the key into the lock and unlocked the door, she stepped inside. She closed the door and stared at the empty space.

”Now to be alone. People are so much trouble.”

“God go away…” Kira growled. She felt a sharp pain in her chest, she clutched her chest and slumped to the floor. “Wh-What..” she felt the sensation of not being able to breath. She didn’t understand what was going on, she suffered no injuries lately.

”I am a part of you and I will always be here..”

She felt like she was on the verge of tears but it wasn’t the pain that bothered her. As sudden as it started, it went away. Kira collapsed the rest of the way onto the floor. “****..” she said. She rubbed her face.

”Don’t mind that cold woman…it will be alright..”

Kira wasn’t sure at first who that other voice was. Was it the nicer one? Kaley…they were the same damn person, why were they so different. Maybe…she was just losing her mind.

[Kira]

August 26th, 2013

Kira ran to the temple, quickly moving across the stones to the back of the temple. She went to the sitting area and kicked off her shoes before flopping down on the seat. She laid down, crossing her legs at the ankles and put her hands on her stomach. She needed to get to the bottom of this. She closed her eyes.

She expected to go to her inner world, the Temple at Kildare but this was a seashore. Her bare feet were in the sand, the waves splashed up against nearby rocks. "Where am I.." she muttered.

"You don't remember this place?"

Kira looked over, a woman with red hair stood there. She knew her...seen her before in a dream. "Sister of my mother..." she said. It was her aunt, who raised her for some time.

Her aunt nodded, "The shore...you know it." she said with a smile.

"It was near the village.." Kira said, flashes of battles fought here, the sand turned red and ran into the water. "Why am I here now?"

"Your...sides. They dwell in your inner world so I brought you here." her aunt replied. "So we can talk without that one. I don't know why she is so bitter."

"Been asking myself the same thing." Kira replied with a sigh. Her green eyes focused on the woman, she couldn't remember really how much she cared for her. She had been family after all. "How many times have I died and returned?"

"Must we talk about such depressing things.."

Kira glared at her. "It would be nice to enlighten someone who thinks they have gone ******* crazy! First Warrior, now you. You all have to be in my mind." she snapped. She had to have died many times, she wanted to know the truth. Why did she wake up in New York with no memory of her early life.

What broke her from her meditative state was what sounded like a canon going off.

Kira sat up, holding her chest. Her eyes moved to what was moving over by the pond and found Sof coming out of the water and shook her fur. Kira sighed, "Stop trying to fish..." she said before falling back onto the chair. Another unhelpful voice in her head. ******* great.

[Kira]

August 27th, 2013

Kira was sitting in a director chair but had her legs over the arm of it, leaning against the other arm rest. She was alone in the lounge right now. There wasn't anything interesting about the lights on the stage, they were off. She was tired of reading the ******** on the CrowNet.

"Related to the High King of Ireland."

That's what the voice had said, her aunt. If you traced back anyone's bloodline, they were related to some kind of royalty. She didn't understand the politics of the vampires. All had to do with who was the oldest.

She closed her eyes, maybe it was time for a vacation. Her fear of the sun was what really prevented her from going to Ireland or anywhere else for that matter. It would have to be timed all so carefully. This town was swirling down the sewer. Though who would take care of her shops while she was gone considering Dave would have to come with her.

Kira hummed, opening her eyes to see her wraith trying to mess with the sound system. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"You are rather boring. Need some music. Damn not being able to press play." Marcus said.

Kira rolled her eyes.

"Well entertain me then. There's no good gossip at the bank." Marcus replied.

"I'm not here for your entertainment." Kira said, turning her attention back to the dark ceiling. She thought the gossip collecting was Tessa's thing not his.

"I'll let Tessa take over..."

Kira sat up, what kind of threat was that? Tessa would surely complain about everything, from the way Kira was dressed to her hair. "You were a cruel man weren't you?" she said.

"Not at all. I just know how to get what I want." he paused. "Make it a love song!" he added because he knew she hated them.

"You're such a jerk." Kira said, jumping down from the chair and headed over to the sound system.

"Oh come now. It will take your mind off of the **** of the city."

"For three full minutes." Kira said, she looked to the clock. She should head home pretty soon anyway. She was still collecting everything she needed to make her own little music studio, something she wouldn't admit to anyone really. A person who enjoys fighting, but also enjoys making music, they were so completely different. She ran the song through, turning down the vocials that were already there. Kira grabbed the mic.

Heart by Heart

"Now why is it you can show all that emotion, through a song but no other time?"

Kira turned the mic off, shutting down the sound system. "The only time I believe I feel emotions, understand them is through song or...the energy of other people. It is so very short lived. It's easy to express what the lyrics are about." she said. "Its a fairytale however. There's no kind of love like what's written in a song like that. Love is a myth.."

She didn't say anything else and headed out of the lounge.

[Kira]

August 28th, 2013

Kira had been looking into opening another Lounge, but it would be different from the other one. But no such luck figuring out if there was a store under the one she already had, she wanted to connect them if she could. Giving up she asked Odin, and he confirmed the fact there wasn't one directly under the one she had. She wondered if there would be a floor going above later, one never knew in this city.

But then he hugged her. WTF. If she hadn't been in such a shock, she would have stabbed him. She had to ask why the hell would he hug her.

August 29th, 2013

Dru informed them that David licked her. Kira tried not to laugh about it, she had been on the receiving end of that tongue before, and worst of all it being after he went all sewer man. God the thought of the smell still made her feel ill. Kira was keeping her distance from the man, she threw an inspire here and there when she thought about it but she had no desire to see him.

[Kira]

August 30th-31st, 2013

Lexy and Windy got into it again. Windy got her pretty good on the arm. Why did she had to refer to him as my boyfriend. She had enough of that **** when David did it. They still needed to plot Windy's death.

However when I went to say hello myself...I feel like some kind of cosmic joke. Why in the world, of all the times, I want to hit this man, I get his clothes? And he gets mine. I mean really...

Well frankly I'm sure he wants to see me naked but that's really besides the point.
I think if I could have cried, I would have...maybe, I don't know.

Throwing down our weapons at least resulted in some broken bones for the both of us...but nothing is better than slicing into someone...so it really wasn't satisfying.

Another time, another place I'm sure.

Because Windy has to die *and so sings in the tune of Earl had to die. Goodbye Earl*

[Kira]

September 7th, 2013

Kira was taking a break from the raid, while she had fully enjoyed the fact that it was gangster it sucked getting to the second floor only to be kicked out. Her wraith said that the higher floors had more interesting people to fight. That just drove her crazy. She wanted to fight them.

She leaned against the wall, off out of the way in an alley. The fighting had kept her mind off of Odin, the man was trending on thin ice. He hadn't replied to her e-mail yet, only saying he could always whisper in her ear his answer. Another male, another game it seemed. She could turn it around on him, maybe later if he did it again. She had warned him if he whispered in her ear again she would stab him, and she would, after she does something else.

She closed her eyes and sighed. Why were men so damn annoying? She didn't trust Odin of course, just as she didn't trust David for obvious reasons. It was sad that Anemoi was one to be trusted...to a point but that paladin had to die. She had settled on the fact that men couldn't be trusted, there was no such thing as love. Her life would be lived for herself only and for the goddess.

Kira without realizing it had started to sing softly, some random song to clear her head. It echoed off the sides of the building, reaching out to the populated street. When she opened her eyes, there were four people there. Her song cut off short as she jumped in surprise. She had been very alone here, besides maybe some rats. When she stopped the song, they looked around in confusion as if they had no idea why they were here.

When they looked at her their eyes widened. "What's wrong with your eyes?" one said.

Kira looked confused. "What are you talking about?" she asked.

"Oh come on, they're just contact. Really, Halloween is next month." another one brushed it off and went on their way, the others bought it and left, though they were still confused on how they got there.

Kira moved down the alleyway away from where the group had gone. What the hell where they talking about? She wasn't wearing any contact. Her eyes were just green. She looked into the nearest window but she saw nothing wrong with them besides her hair flickering to red. "Stay out of this Warrior.." she muttered.

She was unaware that the people had seen cat eyes instead of normal eyes. She looked at the time, she should be getting back to the raid.