Early Onset.

[Pyper]

One.Six
~

Pages are smudging.
The blood makes ink run.
Too many [indecipherable] ins.
Infection smell is gone.
[indecipherable] are falling away.
Crumbling.
I tried to to [indecipherable]. To eat.
[indecipherable] Phoenix. Ask for something.
For blood.

----- [indecipherable]

[Pyper]

S e 7 e n
~

I've been reaching out.
Through phone. Not head.
Texted, said words.
Asked questions. I have many.
I have a project. Well, I had two.
One. Ferals.
Phoenix and Axel said we could make them.
Theoretically.
I tried, for hours.
Bite, wait.
Kill.
Again, again, again.
Two.
Learning to keep Anais.
Make her dependent. On me.
So she won't leave.
So I can poke into her head, see things.
Her things.
Know why she told the doctor to do those things.
Peel her. She has layers.
Axel said he could help.
Said to break her.
I want to know how.
What I should do.
The limits.

He'll show me.

[Pyper]

[scribble]
~

Phoenix cried.
It hurt.
Worse than any knife.
Any sword.
Take all my limbs.
Drill into my head.
I will suffer for her.
But it isn't what she wants.
She wants me to be like everyone else.
I can try.
But inside, I will never be.
I know that.
I can pretend. Watch more tv.
Practice talking.
Train.
No.. No wounds.
After these last ones.
Then no more. For a long time.
Then she will smile.
Be happy. I like when she is.
I will be what she wants.
Sometimes, be me.
Not where she can see.
Once in a while. Maybe.


I can do that.

[Pyper]

|7L7L7L7
|
|
|
~

No wounds rotting.
I smell cleaner.
A long time now.
I eat out of the packets, I'm full.
Then I do more practice.
I'm better. I don't miss as much.
I don't know compared to other people.
We still can't hit.
Phoenix never said that we could again.
I talked to Saige.
About love.
She told me, and described things.
It's a mystery.
One of the dark, slippery things.
You grab it and it evades.
Then it's gone for a while.
Axel also communicated by phone.
Asked to see me, and I answered.
Then there was nothing.
I don't know what he wanted.
I'm resting near Roderic.
I haven't seen him in a long time.
Not in the office.
I stopped leaving messages, and wrote down questions.
For when he comes around.
About the business, and other stuff.
He smells like blood.
It's old, in his clothing.
So I did something. I expanded.
Cast my mind around, and hardened it.
The air, and clicked something in us.
Phoenix doesn't like wounds.
I don't like them on Roderic, if I have to be unscathed.


Fair is fair.

[Pyper]

July 8th, July 9th? 2014
~

I did get hurt.
The sun. I thought my mind would reflect the light.
Cast it away, make it bounce back.
Somewhere else.
I never checked Roderic to see if he had wounds.
He noticed mine.
He touched my hair.
It's the hole in his head. It's still leaking.
Or it was.
He peeled some skin.
It hurt but I smiled.
Should I have frowned?
He wanted more hair.
I cut some of mine. It's in a box.
It's at work.
My necklace matches my lamp.
I have the lamp at work, too.

Skin for bones.

[Pyper]

Once Upon A Time.
~

Ink wells spill and harden. Become woven paths and they twist.
Locks and spill, but never stain. They create her.
Titian shades, never obscured with voids in the middle.
They narrow.
They fixate.
Something comes. More of the writer's mark.
It collects, it's mindful.
Worry beads at the pores, and suffocates nearbys.
I have seen this mass, because in it, there's a figure.
A darkening pit malignantly ensnares the sides of the digestive organ.
Rolls it like dough, kneads it into a jellied mess.
Relentlessly.
"I take," it says in my ear, though the words are different.
The meaning underneath, blanketed. Never truly hidden.
"I devour," it continues, pawing. A flicker of nothing.
Everything is easier to understand than nothing.
Nothing is incomprehensible, impossible.
It offers a hand, immoral in its use.
It asks me to give, so that it can take.
I remember the expression, a doubt rising and smoothing out before its term.
Does a holy figure sell themselves to learn more about the Devil?

[Pyper]

There Was A Girl.
~

Feverish, the twitch-twitch-twitch.
Excitable, a label adopted, forced to carry around.
Use a sign of caution.
The feel of pushing through the skin and piecing it together.
An invisible mesh to aid in the regeneration.
Teeth show in the smile, just the top row.
Nothing but pure exhilaration makes strength come with more abundance.
How easy it is to fix, there's no leak anymore.
Wipe away the blood, the pus.
Almost new again.

[Pyper]

They Called Mercy-Me.
~

Questions, but the answer is the same.
No.
There were never thoughts, or insinuations.
No illusions or misinterpretations.
It is simple, it is black and it is white.
There are two positions in the entrepreneurial hierarchy.
It is a two leveled totem pole. One, and then the other.
Stacked on top. Power resides the higher up the venture.
There is frustration.
This hand hurts from writing.
No more tonight.

[Pyper]

She Wasn't Allowed To Be All She Could Be.
~

Hands are steady. Not steady. At the same time.
Hard to write. Might seek an alternative.
Auditory.
Visual.
More wires to collect, to make either.
Wrap them together.
Spark the life.
All soon. To harvest the wires.

A hole blew through.
Pink gum, chewed into tiny bits.
Over the ground where it happened.
Wolf pelt helped, stopped the blood.
Given away now.

Another pack.

[Pyper]

Then She Died, And Was In For A Ride;
~
I saw a doctor.
His name is Charles.
We talked, just once.
I told him my name, the other one.
The real one.
His plants are dead, and he twists my head.
I think things I wouldn't otherwise.
I also met Nishaa.
That is Paige's girlfriend. It was brief.
Nishaa isn't her real name.
Roderic said that a lot of people have aliases.
But Roderic is his real name.
Charles gave me a new journal, to replace this one.
I'm still tinkering with it.