The Answer is Always

[Kenlie (DELETED 4989)]

--The following transcript was a live chat roleplay--

Play this song while you read the following posts for the full effect.

Vlad: Vladimir looked a little taken aback by the song and the look on his sister face then said it all, though even she managed to smile. There were a line of young men standing at the back of the cathedral who had been leaning against the wall. Vladimir thought, considering their university jackets, that they were probably from one of Verne’s sports teams and no doubt had been out partying with coach from time to time. He laughed when they all started dancing quietly at the back, waving their arms around like a troop of chimps fighting over a banana.


Dominique: As soon as the music started playing she wasn’t surprised. She glanced around then back at Kenlie as the song played out. They might as well be sitting in the seat of a roller coaster. Who knew what the hell was going to happen next. She glanced at the doors and then to the watch that was on the womans wrist next to her. As soon as she did that the gray haired woman looked at her like she had been caught doing something she shouldn’t. She smiled uncomfortably then scooted a little closer to Kenlie.

“I have no clue who that is.” She nodded to the woman next to her. “Great song though. I can see him dancing to this one.”


Kenlie: The song was like a blessing, in its own way. It snapped Kenlie out of her trance and had her gasping in surprise. That… was not what she would normally expect to be played at a funeral. In the same vein, though, she totally expected it from Verne. When Dom commented on it, she couldn’t help but bark a laugh that was quickly muffled by her palm. The laughter quickly turned to wheezing, which she tried to cover up by pushing her mouth into Dom’s shoulder.

“You didn’t,” she whispered between bouts of catching her breath, her palm slapping lightly against her lap. “Oh ****, oh ****…”

Memories of their parties flooded back to her in images, like a thirty second movie filled with drinks, laughter and daredevil stunts. His epic but silly dance moves and that one time they made him clip his nasty toenails while watching Star Wars, now her favorite film series and franchise of all time. The song was so very Verne. She couldn’t stop laughing -- joyous, happy laughter that tinted her cheeks and made her eyes water. It was exactly what they needed: to remember him, and themselves, at his happiest.


Dominique: She couldn’t help breaking her straight disposition and start giggling with Kenlie. “Yes.” She stopped briefly when the woman next to her glared disapprovingly. “I sure did.” She figured even if she was likely committing multiple sins at this point she was paying respect to the man Verne was in a way maybe most wouldn’t quite get but she and Kenlie certainly did. Her dark eyes shot over to the woman next to her. ”He was a dancing machine.” She nodded and was given a huff of disgust as the woman looked away for the first time. Dominique leaned back to Kenlie. “If looks could kill…”


Kenlie: “Damn right he was,” she said, calming down enough so she could speak clearly. “Should’ve had a party in his name.” When she heard the huff of the woman next to them, Kenlie arched a ‘brow and looked over. That look wasn’t going to earn an apology from her for remembering Verne in the only way that she could. So instead of apologizing, she waved at the woman and smiled sweetly until she kept looking away from them. “Ignore it,” she whispered to Dom.


Dominique: Looked to the back of the cathedral and found the guys dancing . She nudged Kenlie to catch the dance line before it ended. Once the music ended she thought it was finally the time she could summon the courage to say what she didn’t get a chance to before. It would not be the private words she would share when he was finally back home but words that would be expected from her in front of those who cared enough to say goodbye to the man who had brought so much to their lives. Her hand reached down and weaved her inked fingers into her sister’s.

“Come up with me. We need to say something.” A song came to her mind as she said the very words to Kenlie. Tears could come back but she willed them not to. Not yet. For a brief moment she was clinging to the beautiful energy that was flowing from the man no one truly wanted to let go of. “Then we can all go home together.”


Kenlie: When Dom nudged her to watch as the baseball team started dancing, Kenlie laughed again and had to wipe tears from beneath her eyes. She loved and missed those boys something fierce. The whole thing was bittersweet.

When she felt her sister’s hand in hers and heard the words from her lips, Kenlie swallowed thickly and nodded her head as she turned to face the front again. She said nothing to protest as she stood, squeezing Dom’s fingers firmly so she could give her support to get on her feet if she needed it. Once more, those invisible fingers were squeezing off her air passages, which did little except to make her voice hoarse. As tears filled her eyes, she heard her abuelo’s voice in her head: ‘Big girls don’t cry, mija.’ So she fought with them, willing them not to spill over while she cleared her throat and walked hand in hand with her sister to the pulpit.

[Dominique]

Music

The walk up was supposed to be easier after that first song and dance with the men in the back taking a moment to show their coach he could bring everyone a laugh even now as he was at rest. But it wasn’t. Fear set in. Not for what she was planning to do once they left but for what she couldn’t do. She could never bring him back.

This time there wouldn’t be a reappearance in a few weeks or months. The sweet sound of his voice calling to her as his tall body moved through their home in search of her. There would be no more walking in the door and finding him leaning at the counter with that beautiful smirk on his face like he never left at all. With each step she realized none of this was going to be what she hoped for or wanted. It was going to be harder than it was at that moment as she felt the burn of the eyes that were in the room following them. She could count every wrong she would never make right and selfishly wrapped her fingers a little tighter around Kenlie’s. She did a mental checklist remembering at the end the God she was taught to rely on already had the list on hand.

It seemed to take forever to get in front of the pulpit and yet when Dominique arrived she wished for more of what she had an eternity of… time. She turned and stood there looking out at the faces staring back at her. Now she knew what that saying about being like a deer caught in the headlights meant. She couldn’t move, but she finally did. HOPE covered LESS that was weaved in Kenlie’s own hand. She looked at her and smiled gently as the tears burned their way down her own cheeks.

“I know some of you…” Her chest suddenly hurt and she paused her words. She held tighter to Kenlie’s hand. She swallowed slow and summoned the strength she needed to get through saying what she had to say about the man she would give anything at that moment to trade places with. “I am Dominique… Dom… Mini.”

A silence just lingered there as she collected the words in her head in the order she wanted to deliver them. Her eyes went to Vlad and his sister beside him. “Thank you.” She never felt like she belonged anywhere but Verne and the Order changed that. It was her home. “I will never forget the first time I saw him.” She bit her bottom lip and wished she could turn back time. “I was in the front seat of his car with the wires in my hands trying to steal it.” She was pretty sure she was going to hell or was there already so the truth could only be a respectful offering to the man just out of reach in front of her that she loved possibly too much. He would understand and perhaps even laugh. At least she hoped he would. He knew her too well.

“I thought I had it all figured out until I looked up to the door opening and saw this man who looked at me and changed everything. It was powerful and perfect and it was meant to be. It was to last and endure and for any moment I took for granted I will always ache with regret.” Forget her chest hurting. Now she felt like she was going to dissolve into the pulpit she brought her petite hand up to and held on to. “I never deserved the time I had with him and am grateful I had it all the same. I love him. I can’t imagine a moment without him and there is nothing I wouldn’t do to change the fact we are all even here… except let him go. It is not possible. How can you express what he meant when the impact he left upon you was life altering? I just can’t…” She was damned if she could allow strangers that deep into what they shared. Few would understand anyways. With that she looked to Kenlie then back to the sea of faces in front of her. “My world has lost it’s sunshine, it’s warmth and has turned dark. He takes my heart with him.” She was done. Her eyes closed to contain the tears she knew would not stop if they started now.

[Vladimir (DELETED 5105)]

To share is to represent that you care about something or someone, why then do we always leave it until it is too late?

Vladimir sat alongside his sister Veronika, their heads bowed as Dominique took to the stage, her chosen song playing softly in the background, echoing the frustration they all shared; Verne was the sun that had been stolen from the sky and the ensuing darkness that crept in unwanted, ready to take its place. The day is gone… He knew then it was a song he would never be able to forget.

Suddenly the man felt as if he were being smothered, shrouded in the darkness that slivered through the seals in the casket to spill out and move across the floor like a black mist, hungry and intent on strangling any shred of light that remained. Run away… Vladimir closed his eyes and felt that if Dominique didn’t speak soon he might have too, guilt stricken that someone so loved by his brother Verne had to stand up there above a sea of flowers and candles in front of a weepy crowd that couldn’t decide where to point their eyes.

Love is bleeding… He glanced up at the aching heart and for a few short seconds their eyes met and Vladimir felt a bead of salty water roll down his puffy red cheek. He swallowed the lump in his throat and smiled as best he could at Dominique’s recollection of the moment she had first laid eyes on Verne. Later he would smile about it, he might even laugh, but for now all he could do was picture the face he desperately longed to gaze upon again in the flesh, feel those bear-like arms crush him playfully, hell he would even settle for a balled fist to the shoulder.

Veronika’s hand found his again and suddenly it was hard to recall a time that it hadn’t been there, consumed by his grief. I can see the darkness. A life without him seemed incomprehensible, and for a long time it would be; the world would keep spinning, the sun would run from the moon and every now and then he might look up at the stars and see the sky smile down at him. Vlad would look up, point a finger, and smile back.

His voice a whisper, barely, Vladimir felt his lips move as he formed the words, “Watch over her brother… Watch over us all.”

[Kenlie (DELETED 4989)]

The entire time that Dominique spoke, Kenlie felt like she wasn’t even in her own body. She was a ghostly apparition, invisible to everyone in the pews as their faces lit up with tears and memories of their own. So she just stood there, frozen and holding tightly onto Dominique’s hand as she pretended that it was all part of a movie. Because that was all she could do to keep herself from bursting into tears.

It was the squeeze of her sister’s fingers that had her coming to. Blinking, she turned to look into Dominique’s tear-filled gaze. Just like that, her heart was broken all over again. The lines of her mouth furrowed into a trembling frown as she cupped Dom’s hand and squeezed it, lifting the inked digits to her lips to kiss the knuckles. “It’ll be okay,” she murmured beneath her breath. Unfortunately, she wasn’t sure if she genuinely felt the truth of those words, or not.

After sniffing a few times and clearing her throat, she tucked her arm around Dominique and stepped a little closer to the podium. Her free hand lowered to grasp the opposite side of it, knuckles white from the strength of her grip. Once she’d taken a few deep breaths, she lowered her gaze to the slanted wooden surface and spoke like no one but Dominique was there.

“My name’s Kenlie Santos, and I’d like to speak on behalf of the Harper Rock University baseball team.” She sighed and lifted her head to look out at the men lined up in the back. Minutes ago, they’d been dancing and laughing amongst themselves. In her four years with the Saints, she could count the number of times that any of them had cried on one hand. And now every single one of them had tears in their eyes. Some were staring at their feet, unable to look up at her, while a few others gave nods and chest-thumps of encouragement in her direction. A small smile slanted her mouth upward, and she had to sniff.

“He was our coach. At first, none of the guys gave him any slack… especially me. I was the toughest on him…” She recalled the first time she’d laid eyes on him like it was yesterday. She’d been a total and utter *****, in part due to the fact that the man who had been like a father to her was leaving. In part to test him. He’d done well.

“We were constantly giving him sh... crap.” Kenlie could hear the gasps from the older people in the crowd as she barely caught herself. Without skipping a beat, she continued.

“He took it all in stride, and in doing so earned our deepest respects. Verne… became the big brother that some of us had never had. If there was one thing that he always thudded into our skulls, it was ‘never give up’.” She felt her teeth clenching as she realized it was for that very reason she was angry with him. God, she didn’t want to be angry. It was the last thing she wanted to feel for him.

“He never underestimated us. Not even me. Not for my gender, my background or where I came from. He only ever pushed us to be the best that we could possibly be… And I think, for that, all of us can say that we’re better human beings.” It was those words that had Sam, the best batter the Saints had ever seen (and one of Kenlie’s dearest friends), choking back an audible sob. For a broad guy that stood six feet and four inches tall, he had the gentlest heart. Kenlie sighed shakily with him and wiped at the tears that were finally spilling over her cheeks.

“We’re all saying goodbye to someone special to us today. For my team… we’re saying goodbye to a brother.” Her voice finally gave towards the end, cracking as she stared down at her hands. With both lips pressed together, she turned to look at Dom through blurry vision, then lifted a hand to gently stroke her face. With that, she took the woman’s hand one more time and waited for her to be ready to walk back to her seat.

[Verne]

Father Simon stepped up after everyone had had their turn speaking. He had opened with a story and sought to close with another so that family and friends could leave the cathedral on a lighter note (though some might find his words a little heavy). He unfolded his page of notes and sat the sheet of paper down beside the Old Testament before starting. “Jesus wept. This is the shortest verse in the Bible. A single noun and verb; there could be nothing simpler than this. But through this verse there is a vital lesson to be learned, something that can be taught and taken with us throughout our lives. Let me share with you as we gather here today to condole in the death of Yavok Verne Berezin, who meant the world to his younger sister, Veronika, and brother, Vladimir.

For them Yavoks’s death means separation from the person who meant so much to them; a separation that cuts deeply and takes time, love, consideration, and friendship to help heal. We may tell them, we understand your pain. We understand what you are going through. But you know that we cannot truly understand what you are going through. Let me tell you honestly that we can never understand what they are going through; only Jesus can understand their pain. Only Jesus can understand their sense of loss. Only he understands it. That is what this simple sentence ‘Jesus wept’ means. Jesus understands our every pain and agony.

Let me explain. Jesus had just returned to the village of Bethany, to the home of his beloved friends, Martha, Mary, and Lazarus, a family of siblings who lived together. Lazarus, a dear friend of our saviour, had died four days earlier, and there was deep mourning surrounding his burial place within his tomb. Lazarus’ sisters, also dear friends of Jesus, were distraught over the loss of their beloved, younger brother.

Jesus came to stand in the midst of these mourners, this scene of sorrow. He listened to their cries of pain and loss; he watched as tears streamed down hopeless faces and shared in their helplessness. In the midst of this dark moment of weeping and sorrow, Jesus put his arms around his friends and wept.

But throughout this ordeal, even as they cried their salty tears and mourned for the loss of their beloved brother, Jesus knew that in just a moment he would be raising Lazarus from the dead; that the young man would soon be up and walking again, just as full of life as he had always been. He would hug his sisters again and rejoice with friends. Why then, if Jesus knew all along that he would be returning Lazarus to his family, was he weeping? Why would he share in such deep sorrow just before he was due to perform this joyous miracle?

My friends, when you care for someone, you sympathise with that person and share in their pain. This verse ‘Jesus wept’ speaks volumes of the extraordinary love of Jesus Christ for each soul that he created. He does not rejoice in our deaths, but empathises with our loss. He felt the heartache of those around him and wept.

Herein lays the message for you, dear Veronika and Vladimir, that Jesus understands your heartbreak, feels your pain, the same pain he felt for Martha and Mary. He weeps with you in times of loss, rejoices with you in times of plenty, and will always be there throughout your lives to share in whatever life may bring your way. Even though we who are gathered around you may not understand your pain, we weep with you, just as Jesus wept with his friends.

Jesus conquered death. Jesus who wept for Lazarus, who displayed his love and empathy for his friends, said Lazarus, Lazarus, Come out! Immediately the man stirred as noises were heard from deep within his tomb and to his loved ones shock, Lazarus stumbled from his tomb, blinking at the haze of bright light and dazed faces that stared back at him. The young man who was dead and buried rose again, stronger and healthier than ever, ready to praise the name of our lord, Jesus Christ.

In the face of the death, we take solace in the words of the bible and the stories it shares to help guide us through life's obstacles. Death is dead. Jesus conquered it. And the death your brother experienced is only a passage to another life which is eternal, where he will suffer no pain, no sicknesses and no death which you and I hope to obtain in the course of time. Until then we all long and prepare for the end, for the life which Yavok had been delivered already. Our hearts are restless until they rest in you, Lord. Let this hope keep us going until we all meet again in another life. Amen.”

As Father Simon gave his blessing the young men from the university baseball team moved to the front of the room to take hold of the casket and lift it up to rest upon their shoulders. Vladimir stood at the front left side of the coffin with his left fist wrapped tightly around the silver handle, knuckles white, eyes bloodshot and cheeks puffy. He put his right hand on the shoulder of the man across from him who in turn settled his left hand against Vladimir. When all of them were ready Vladimir’s chosen song for Verne played over the surround speakers and they slowly walked the casket wrapped in the Russian flag down through the sea of people, flowers and flickering candles.

The black hearse was waiting outside along with the driver who stood leaned back against the car checking his pocket watch. Galahad, God’s Assassin, had moved during the wake to stand at the back of the cathedral and check that all was in order. The burial was to take place within the cathedral grounds, which was a short walk across the field of graves both old and new, though the hearse would have to go around and at one point go onto the public road. Galahad watched the men walk the coffin out slowly, narrowing his blue eyes at the woman, Kenlie, who stood amongst them, taking the back, right end of the coffin as if she were one of the lads.

They were followed by Dominique and Veronika who walked together with their arms linked and behind them the rest of their friends and guests filed out of the cathedral to make their way across the grounds to where Verne would be put to rest. Galahad walked in silence with Father Simon, who still seemed a little wary about getting too close to the ‘not so friendly giant’. He watched the men (and woman) lower the casket down into the back of the hearse and walk slowly alongside the vehicle until it got to the road. It was then Galahad noticed Kenlie join Dominique as Vladimir took up his sister’s arm again to cross the green field.

Galahad glanced back to see the pair meet up with another couple outside of the cathedral before they were all out of sight. He didn’t notice then that the vehicle containing the coffin with Verne’s body inside had been switched, or if you prefer, turned off down a side road as one identical took up its place and continued round to the burial site where the baseball team would once again take up the casket (minus one inked up bad-girl), instead replaced by Veronika herself.

The coffin was set over the grave and everyone gathered to listen to Father Simon speak for the last time. “Our brother Venre has gone to his rest in the peace of Christ, may the lord now welcome him to the table of the children in heaven. With faith and hope in eternal life, let us assist him with our prayer. Let us pray also to the lord for ourselves, may we who mourn be reunited one day with our brother, together may we meet Christ Jesus when he who is our life appear in glory. We read in sacred scripture…”

“Come, you who are blessed by my Father, says the Lord, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. This is the will of the one who sent me, says the Lord that I should not lose anything of what he gave me, but that I should raise it on the last day. Our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we also await a saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is the firstborn of the dead; to him be glory and power forever and ever. Amen."

Lord Jesus Christ, by your own three days in the tomb, you hallowed the graves of all who believe in you and so made the grave a sign of hope that promises resurrection even as it claims our mortal bodies. Grant that our brother may sleep here in peace until you awaken him to glory, for you are the resurrection and the life. Then he will see you face to face and in your light will see light and know the splendour of God, for you live and reign for ever and ever. Amen.”

‘Lord just as you consoled Martha and Mary in their distress, draw near to us and mourn for Verne and dry the tears of those who weep...’ “Lord have mercy,” the crowd joined in.

‘You wept at the grave of Lazarus, your friend, comfort us in our sorrow, we pray to the Lord…’ “Lord have mercy,” they chimed once again with Father Simon.

‘You raised the dead to life, give to our brother eternal life, we pray to the Lord…’ “Lord have mercy,” the baseball team joined in, finally catching on.

‘You promised paradise to the repentant thief, bring Brother Verne to the joys of heaven, we pray to the Lord…’ “Lord have mercy.”

‘Our brother was washed in baptism and anointed with the Holy Spirit, give him fellowship with all your Saints, we pray to the Lord…’ “Lord have mercy,” Galahad bowed his head.

‘He was nourished with your body and blood, grant him a place at the table of your heavenly kingdom, we pray to the Lord…’ “Lord have mercy,” Veronika sobbed.

‘Comfort us in our sorrow at the death of Brother Verne, let our faith be our consolation and eternal life, our hope, we pray to the Lord…’ “Lord have mercy,” Vladimir whispered as he comforted his sister.

“With longing for the coming of God’s kingdom, let us pray…” Father Simon spoke up, leading the prayer.

“Our Father, who art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy Name.
Thy Kingdom come.
Thy will be done in earth,
As it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
As we forgive them that trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
The power, and the glory,
For ever and ever.
Amen.”

‘God of holiness and power, accept our prayers on behalf of your servant Verne, do not count his deeds against him, for in his heart he desired to do your will. As his faith united him to your people on earth, so now may your mercy join him to the angels in heaven. We ask this through Christ our Lord.’ “Amen,” the crowd echoed.

“May the mighty God bless you in the name of The Father, The Son, and of the Holy Spirit,” Father Simon finished as he shook holy water over the casket and a trumpet player sounded his horn in the background.

Galahad stepped forward to help two men remove the flag from the casket and fold it correctly into the shape of a neat triangle. He then presented the flag to Father Simon who walked it over to Vlaidmir slowly and held it out. “On behalf of the Cathedral of Saint James and Section Three, I present to you this national entity on behalf of your brother’s brave and honourable service to the church, please accept this flag in his honour.”

“Thank you, and my God bless you for it, Father,” Vlad managed as his throat burned and almost caused him to choke up again.

Veronika put an arm around her brother and the two of them moved over to the coffin to touch the rich mahogany before departing. “I love you, always, always,” Veronika whispered, echoed word for word by her older brother. “Always, always…”

[Katie Mae (DELETED 3987)]

Katie sat alone, wishing she knew someone to give her strength. She had never been to a wake or funeral before in her young life. See her friend laying there lifeless was more than she could bear. She sat and listened to the many speakers, making her heart turn cold, to not care so she wouldn’t shed a tear. She hated to cry and she hated it worse in public. She began to shake with her emotions as Dominique got up to speak, torn between anger that she had taken the risk after yelling at Jason for doing the same and getting herself turned and the other part compassion for losing someone who loved.

As Father Simon began to speak, she couldn’t hold her emotions any longer. The tears began to fall no matter how much she tried to stop them. She sniffed, wiping her eyes on her sleeve, her head lowered as if in prayer.

The group stood to follow the casket out to go to the graveyard. Katie stood at the back of the group watching. Many most likely thought she was a stranger than happened up on a funeral. Her arms were wrapped around her side trying to hold the pain in. She was such a quiet girl many probably didn’t even realize she knew him.

The girl’s lips trembled as she fought the tears, dashing at her eyes trying to make the tears stop. She watched as the flag was folded and handed to the family. She wanted one last goodbye but she wouldn’t intrude. She would come to his grave alone so she could talk to him without anyone judging her.

She couldn’t take it anymore; her heart was breaking. Never having lost a friend before she didn’t think it would be this hard. She backed away finally turned to walk quietly away, her sobs silent as she walked, not paying attention to the direction she was going. “Goodbye Verne” she whispered, “You were the person I loved and respected most in the city. I should have told you when you were alive.”

[Dominique]

Dominique felt the warmth of Veronika's arm finding her own. Her eyes met the woman's briefly and the slight smile that was supposed to convey empathy hardly seemed enough. The woman lost her brother in the most incomprehensible manner. How does one accept such a choice? There was no rational way. Everyone was left to walk out of the cathedral and carry on. Each grieving heart that loved the man who chose to leave would have to just that.

With those thoughts Dominique brought her dark clad body closer to the sister Verne had brought over from Russia. The warmth of the blonde Russian found its way through the layers of material between them. Maybe it was selfish but Dominique savored its brief presence and thought of the man that would forever link them in love and loss. Comfort was hardly what she felt she was entitled to but all the same she found it against her hidden flesh. The family rosary Verne had given her nearly a year ago was resting tight against her cool skin beneath her dress. It belonged to his mother. Should she give them to Veronika? Would they bring her comfort?

Dominique reflected back to the moment Verne was before her with the expression across his face that could stop time. He said they would keep her safe and put it in her hands and covered them with his own. She vowed to never let go of them and to guard them with all that she had. A pang of regret grew within her as she stepped slowly in silence with his sister. Would anything be different had Verne kept them instead?

The doors to the cathedral opened and the rush of cool air found its way in over the casket and the team carrying it. Kenlie was so strong. She never realized how much so until she watched her carrying the weight of the casket with her head held high, her shoulders solid. She was a leader much like the man within the wood that moved slowly in the procession out of the place they had shared within The Order. Her burning eyes found little relief in the assault of what could never be tamed or controlled. Winter was coming. Her dark eyes shifted from the casket and team ahead. So briefly her focus went to the tall man in the robe with the chilling blue eyes. A warmth was missing when they found her own. Her wide eyes narrowed. She had enough of judgement. He could save his for another sinner.

Andy’s voice pulled her attention from the stranger and sent her searching subtly about her for where he could be. He was nowhere in sight. Her brow arched upward as she looked to the ceiling. Where was he hiding? Her eyes shifted side to side as they progressed towards the doors. Andy was always full of surprises but this one was a bit beyond anything she ever expected. Perhaps she was now hearing the living as well in her head? It was getting to be one huge chaotic party in there.

The sound of her uncomfortable heels clicked and hissed as she released Veronika’s arm and lifted up to her tip toes and kissed the woman’s tear stained cheeks. Taking the risk of raising her cool inked fingers carrying the permanent message of HOPE was one Dominque could not resist. The silken strands slipped and fell over her hand and in that brief contact she was certain she could feel him again. She smiled and tucked the her behind the woman’s shoulder. She had no words left. Sorry was hardly enough. The respect of saying nothing at all and not adding to her grief seemed far more appropriate.

Dominique turned away once she and Vlad moved on and found Mona and Andy. Mona was a cool chick with a biting direct delivery of whatever she had going on in her beautiful head. She was certainly not a fan of her being one of what they had vowed to hunt but she did have a sense of understanding as much as she could being a paladin. Dominique had respect for her and was not that distant from her views. She stepped over to her and to Andy who she certainly had questions for. Now likely wasn’t the time. If she heard his voice but he in fact had been outside the whole time that would be incredibly awkward. Now was not the time to admit she was back to hearing voices.

“Andy, Mona…” She stepped forward and waited briefly then took the first step and bridged the distance and gave Andy a hug. She was not exactly sure if Mona would be recpetive to hugging so a smile was offered once again upon stepping back.

Looking at Mona her reminded Dominique of the time she and Verne got into it at one of the meetings. Mona said what she thought and Verne attempted to bring order to the otherwise heated level of discussion. Mona was not one to be cut off until she was done saying what she had to say. Words and tempers only elevated and ultimately Verne sent Mona out. Her own lips smiled a bit more and regret filled her behind the effort.

“I am glad you came.” Her words were shaky just as much as her thoughts. What more could she say. She bit her bottom lip, pinching it firmly between her teeth hidden by the top that curled over. Say something. the thought repeated over and over until she finally did just that. “Please continue the work he left behind. All is not lost.”

A sharp cold chill tip-toed up her back as her words ended. How could she offer such for reassurance when she was not completely sure herself? She glanced to Andy and felt stronger and bare all at once. He knew her so well. He was the uncle she never had. A non-judgemental ear when things were confusing or uncertain. Well, now they were yet again and eventually they would talk. However, with Andy she knew that she would have to come prepared to hear what he had to say without an sugar coating. Much like Mona it came out without any frills.

With those thoughts swirling in her head her petite colorful fingers offered HOPE to one of their hands and LESS to the other. Dominique gripped them equally tight then released and stepped back. It was time for her to take her leave. Vita Bella was about to have a delivery and she was required to be there. Her eyes glanced slowly beyond the two and found the hearse driving away.

“I need to go. There is something I have to do.” Her voice cracked. The truth was she was not sure how she could possibly do what she was about to. She only knew she would. “Excuse me.”

Tears found their way back to pooling in her eyes and the pain filled her chest. Each step into the cathedral she just left increased the guilt she carried within. As it should. The place was one she had not stepped into since Verne passed. Now she seemed drawn back inside. She sighed as she made her way to find Kenlie. There was no time left to delay what needed to be done. A man was waiting to be laid to rest in his home. She would not fail him in making it happen.

[Mona McGee]

Mona was lost in her thoughts. Foremost was reaching back into her jacket and pulling the flask back out. Her hand wavered at the jacket opening when the cathedral doors suddenly opened. She quickly stood, dusting her *** off and trying not to look shocked or uncomfortable until she caught the smell of the cigar. She glanced over her shoulder to see Pops standing out on the lawn. She was relieved to see him. She still didn't know the man as well as she should, but seeing him here under these circumstances seemed to help lighten her heart a bit

She watched as the coffin made its way down the steps carried by the pallbearers. A small shiver ran down her spine. Then the family and Dom stepped out. Mona kind of shuffled there nervously from foot to foot until the brunette spotted her and Andy approaching. She was unaware that Pops had came around she glanced at him and nodded at the man that was her father. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, steadying herself for the upcoming conversation Dom was one of her only friends in Harper Rock; the women had gotten along immediately. Then Mona had to leave town: she had been gone, burying her own mother when the woman had befallen her fate.

It was a shock to Mona when she had found out she had been murdered and turned into what she was supposed to hate. But how? How was she supposed to hate Dom? Mona had taken Dom at her word that Dom had never or would ever forcibly take blood from another, and that was good enough for Mona She trusted her more than she would others in this god forsaken town.

Mona didn't know what to say when Dom approached. What could you say? Nothing uttered would ever make it better. Nothing she said would ease the pain one ounce. She smiled and nodded as Dom hugged Pops and she looked uncomfortably at Mona. Mona wanted to reach and take her hand but one moment's hesitation and the opportunity had moved on. Dom spoke to them, telling them to "continue their work." My god. What work was this? People getting killed, murdered, and others turned into monsters, essentially

She glanced at the coffin as they closed the hearse's doors Mona finally broke through her own selfish thoughts and reached out, touching Dom's shoulder as she turned away. "Dom, stay strong. And you know where I'm at if you need me ..." Mona gave a small smile as her hand fell away. God, she had to get out of there soon. She almost took off right then; if Pops hadn't been there she would have.

[Katie Mae (DELETED 3987)]

~ Takes place two days after Verne’s burial~

Katie stood at the edge of the graveyard, a bouquet of handpicked wildflowers held tightly in her small hands. She had remembered planting them near the hot springs close to where Jason lived when they first started seeing one another. The heat of the water had kept the frost from them thus far but the blooms were delicate and still beautiful in the crisp fall air. The bouquet of Harebell, Blanket flower, buttercup, delphinium and fireweed blossoms were the last of the season with enough to make a small bouquet. She tied a ribbon around the bunch and inhaled their delicate fragrance. She knew others would make fun but she knew Verne would understand why she had brought these rather than some ostentatious funeral spray. She was not a flashy person, she was the kind that would blend into the crowd, trying never to be noticed and most did not. She looked at the bouquet, was satisfied, and began to walk to the graveyard.

Standing at the gate, she spied the freshly dug grave. A shiver ran down her spine as she looked at it. The flowers from the funeral were scattered around the headstone and over the grave. She looked at her simple offering and almost turned to leave but she knew if Verne were alive, he would understand. Her gaze went to the mound of freshly turned earth. She began to tremble as she took the scene in.

Verne was under that dirt. Her friend was under that dirt!

She willed herself to walk the distance but could not. She sat in the middle of the road and stared at the grave for several what seemed like hours. Her mind trying to grasp the reality of the situation. Finally, she began to curse herself because Verne deserved to respect and devotion and now was not the time to let her fear set in.

She looked around to make sure she was alone. She stood and slowly walked towards the grave. Her feet heavy, not wanting to move. Standing for several long moments the tears began to fall. Her emotions were raw as she dropped to her knees and gently placed her small token in the center of the dirt. The stone was already set but the name and dates were not carved yet. She wondered when that would happen as she sat staring at it.

Her hand ran through the dirt as she laid down on the grave and cried. Her body wracked with sobs as she cried out all the hurt, the anger and the sorrow she felt for so many things concerning her friend. Her sobs could be heard from a distance as she laid there trying to control her emotions.

When she had cried herself out, she spoke softly, “Verne I’m sorry I never let you know what you meant to me. I know we disagreed about some things but it never made me lose my respect or my love for you for all you did. You made me feel welcome and like I mattered. You always accepted me for who I was, never trying to change me and never expecting more than I could give. You always were satisfied with the loot I would bring you, never pushing for more, making me feel like I was helping in my own small way. You never expected me to be bigger than life; I was good enough being the shy, quiet person I am. I should have thanked you in person for being so kind.” She wiped at her tears sitting up. “I’ve been in the hospital a couple of times from those fangers and I’m not going to give up the fight. I swear. I’ll make you proud of me.”
Sitting here for several long moments she finally asked, “Why did you have to die, what the hell happened to you Verne?”

Katie sat quietly as her words faded into quiet thoughts just staring at the mound keeping her hand on it saying her final goodbyes. She stood slowly up after saying her final goodbyes and began to walk away. She turned one last time dashing at her tears once more before speaking.

“Goodbye Verne, you were a rare jewel and I’ll never forget you.”

Katie turned and walked out of the gate, not wanting to go home to an empty house. She made her way to the QZ to do some killing. She needed to move, not to focus on her emotions. She would wait to see what the final word was of what killed him but if she found that any fanger had anything to do with his death in anyway, she would hunt them down and not rest until they were dead.

[Andrew McGee]

He had seen Mona arrive and in typical McGee fashion she decide to wait outside rather than deal with what was happening within. He was no different. Andrew never put stock in complaining about something someone did that you did yourself. Granted his daughter might be closer to the Order than he was, but she had her reasons, so said nothing. He kept his spot and watched till he saw the doors opening and then moved closer.

He watched the casket being carried out to the waiting hearse, then turned his attentions back when he heard his name being said aloud. He embraced her tightly. He could see it in her eyes she was possibly a half an inch away from falling apart, so he offered no phony comfort words like he heard said at these things all the time.

"When you are ready, you know how to find me." was all he said softly into her ear before the hug was broken. Yes, some evening the two, perhaps three as he considered Mona as well, sit down over some very stiff drinks in private and just say what needed to be said. No judgments or half truths. It was how he was raised to be. Honesty, even brutal honesty had to be better than a lie.

He listened to her words and glanced at his daughter to see if she was thinking the same as him, but again he stayed silent. He squeezed the offered hand and smiled a bit. He could say nothing more. Seeing her like this stabbed him deeply and he glanced at the casket again. Mentally he cursed the man for what he done. As much as he had seen Dominique go through without a scratch, only to be cracked by the one she trusted the most.

She moved on with the group and he held his place, as did Mona. After he was sure there was some distance between them and the gathered mourners, he turned to speak.

"I am personally gonna chalk up what she just said to the stress she is under right now." he pulled out his flask, took a quick drink and then offered it to Mona. "I get the feeling you feel the same way I do on this subject, so perhaps we should retreat to somewhere more private where we can discuss this?" Andy took a step closer to the girl and awkwardly put an arm around her shoulder. "If you don't mind throwing back a few with your ol man, at least."