Path of the Vampire forum

Temperance sat in the corner booth adjacent to the door in good company of the other allurists that also mingled there. Today was an especially calm atmosphere. In fact, it had been quite serene around The Metronome as of late, even with the occasional blood thief, cop or the like stumbling through the door. Crissy and her bouncers had a good system to keep things under control. It pleased her thoroughly.

Something in the air was a tad off with the next patron that wandered in. It did not take Temperance long to recognize the cloaked soul and she grinned pleasantly. She spent so much time quick traveling between the Metronome nightclub and the dingy catacombs that she had not been home to see the women in a few nights. Temperance slipped from the red leather seat, adjusted the length of the plain long black dress and approached the table where Zodiac sat methodically laying out a deck of picture cards. The fashion in which she did was unique, unlike the game of solitaire or kids memory game. Pale fingers sifted through her short locks before taking a seat across from her.

"Summoning a white winter, darling?" A smile lifted to the corners of her cheeks. Temperance rarely saw Zodiac with cards in hand. Most often they were left to the sanctuary of her reading room back home. She was a skeptic with the sort of magical advise but knew that Zodiac sought answers in the pictures. The notion that something could be that powerful was a strange concept all together. One that Tempy never really wanted to try first hand. She laid a forearm to the table top followed by the palm of her hand and waited.

Her eyes tried to focus, but as earlier nothing was making much sense for her at the moment. It was almost as if her deck was conspiring against her wishes now. None of the cards were making sense of each other. The pairings showing her nothing but opposites and not clues and clarifiers. "Everything is in a state of flux for some reason," she sighed in silence. It was as if the spiritual side of her had shut down suddenly. Was this linked to her visions somehow? Were the gods themselves telling her she had to figure this out on her own without their help? Maybe she should summon Dahlia from wherever she was sulking about and ask her.

Ginny chirrped softly from under her hiding place, causing the girl to turn and check on her. As she looked, a familiar feeling of calm washed over her and Zodiac looked up to see her partner-Tempy-sitting across from her. Her eyes took in the sight of her love and relaxed a bit more. As much as she worried her own emotions would have a negative effect on her, Zo found she drew strength at times from that bubble of calm the allurist generated. She laid down her deck as Temperance made the jest about making snow.

"Already have done that back when we was all tracking that Tizher-whatcha-ma-gigger thingy, love." She managed a small smile as she took the offered hand into her own and squeezed gently. It was almost a tangible thing now, as if a soft current of energy was running up her arm that melted away some of the anxiety she was feeling. Zo pictured her own positive energy running back in reply to the gift. It was one of the reasons why they were so good together. Both were 'givers' of a fashion, not takers.

"A lovely night here. Sorry to intrude with my emotional mess, love." she apologized. "I was out and needed to warm up some." And it was true. Zo never had managed to get past the point of not feeling cold for some reason. Most others like them could probably walk about naked and not notice the temperatures as they did when alive, but the girl usually was bundled up tight or curled in blankets in front of her fireplace when the winter came.

"Can I ask you something weird? I mean, more weird than normal from me?" the grip on her lover's hand growing a bit tighter now. "If you had.... not been bitten. You know, turned? Where would you be? What would you be doing right now if you was still alive?" Her mental tone almost pleading as she looked into a pair of eyes she had only seen love in before.

She blinked, an apology was something the allurist had not expected. Fingers wove around the women's cool grasp reassuringly. "Never have you intruded. Even while I worked away in the office and you sat with pleasantries just for company." Temperance canted her head, sincerity in her tone, "And an Emotional mess? Yet you do not feel quite disconnected as that phrase sounds to be. What is troubling you my dear?"

Angela's next question left her to pause. Had she a simple beating heart it would have as well. Her crystal blues casually glanced over the women's shoulder had anyone been listening. The Metronome club was rarely without a live body. Either wandering around as staff or mingling with the common folk that lived here. Often times Temperance identified with them as if she had not been any different at all. "If I had not been turned?" She quietly repeated than pulled the Angela's hand in closer to allow her other to fall upon it in comfort.

A flutter lifted through her veins upon the thought of being 'alive' again. Her journey to Harper Rock was simply for blue collar pay. Had she not been turned, Temperance would drive her mothers old brown mercury back home from the Worthington Casino every night (assuming she was hired there to sing.) The drive, although 45 minutes from home, would be worth the pay and comfort to be among others that was not part of her own small town. "Why. Well, I suppose I would be lingering here on occasion only to return to my home when I'm not working. I would be tidying the church for my dear uncle." Temperance grinned as her orbs lit with a bit of familiarity as the thought ran away. "Tending to the elderly after service, working more on my vocals and wearing heavier clothes." A chuckle escaped in the last part. Canada had a dreadfully cold winter and Zodiac's need for warmth was the same as her own when she was human. Her thin frame would quickly chill to the bone leaving her fingers, toes and nose rosy or blue to tingle to life when she was sitting in front of the hearth in her own living room.

Reality quickly set in and Temperance squeezed tightly around her love's hand. "Silly to think about it though. We have so much more here, with how we are. Friends, supplemental family, and careers and each other," she smiled unsure if the response to the question did justice. She had buried this same question a long time ago, when every wakeful night effortlessly turned into sleepy days. It was something she could not change, nor reverse but just to be. And so she did. She moved forward into the depths of this land, buried her head deep in work, friends and well established family as if this was what was meant to be. Temperance didn't really believe that this eternal future was written in the stars or fate laid it all out. Had that been, she would be the first person to a psychic reading to know the winning strategy to a game of craps and why her mother had to die so young and what she could have done to prevent that fate from happening. "What's on your mind, really? Are you unhappy here, love?"

She listened to that soothing voice begin to answer. The first time she heard her speak, it had caught her thoughts and had never really let go. Like a gentle balm, her words slip around her thoughts now as her hand seemed to anchor her to reality. Zodiac watched the girl consider her question. Not the normal table talk the pair of them enjoyed almost nightly upon awakening, she would have to admit.

She watched Tempy close now as she answered. It was what she expected actually. Some would consider her answer boring, but it was truth. The girl considered her own answers to that question as opposed to the ones she had been shown. She doubted deeply her and the woman holding her hands would have met. Their circles of activity when alive would not left much room to cross each others paths at all. No, this would have been something she would not have experienced at least with her.

She saw the change in her eyes. What could have been now being replaced with what was. She could not argue the points her love made. How many doors had opened that never would have if she was still alive? Alive she was just a curiosity. A little girl reading cards for those who would pay. Selling candles and curios for those who enjoyed such things while being the one people commented about behind her back (quite loudly at times. Once someone saw her sign they would assume can't speak also means can't hear and begin to comment away. even now she did not make a habit of informing some her hearing was better than most.)

"...and each other."

Even she felt it. A touch of warmth briefly fluttered through her now. It was possibly the best thing to happen to her since her turning. Zodiac, despite all the things she practiced and gave credit to, was not a follower of fate but Temperance was a example of it in ways. It was as if they were supposed to be together in some way, shape or form. How they just seemed to get along from square one and as they grew closer it continued.

"What's on your mind, really? Are you unhappy here, love?"

Her own eyes locked into the blues ones that regarded her now. Was she?

"I doubt I have ever been happier in ways," she smiled as she held the woman's hands in hers. "If anything good came out of what happened to me, it is sitting across the table from me now. But the last few days I have been wondering about other things. Things perhaps I should have made peace with by now but never did," Her view expanding now as she noticed the twinkling lights from some of the holiday decorations placed tastefully within the Met. They were to add a holiday feeling to the scene around them, but now they were more of an annoyance to the girl's senses.

"Maybe I am overthinking the situation as always," she declined to tell Tempy of the 'visions' she had endured earlier. Now, part of her wasn't even sure she actually had the experience at all. The questions remained, but now it seemed more abstract rather than absolute. "Somethings I still miss now. Stupid things. I have seen so many of us shed off their humanity like a dirty shirt and never look back. No regrets at all and eager to act like they never were human to begin with. But me? I can't help it. I still think of myself as a person, not a monster, and I can't shake off the good parts so easily like others can."

A single thin river of crimson began to run down her cheek as it wrecked havoc with her purple makeup she was so fond of around her eyes in patters and designs. For a moment it occurred to her that Temperance was perhaps the only person who had ever seen her clean faced and free of all her whimsicals bits of make up fun in place. "But there is new good parts and that should make loosing the old good parts better, but I still miss things and I don't know how to stop it. 'Vamp up' as I heard someone say once and get over it. I love you and that's the best new part of all."

"Nothing you worry about could be that stupid, especially if it means a lot to you. To some it might seem trivial, but that just means their priorities are different in their own lives." Temperance stuck to her guns when it came to judgement of things, persons and situations. She felt the need to collect as much detail as she could from a scenario and only then make an educated response. Of course those responses were only as good as the information received and how she felt with it. Etienne saw this in her and so did many others, but he in particular once said it would be the death of her. There was an innocence about her when trying to understand the many aspects of an event and no matter how hard she would try, something was bound to be left out, skewing her point of view. It was not done intentionally or so she had thought it never was and often enough she was found the fool after finding out the truth much later.

Angela had made a good point. The vampire in us came with automatic restrictions, laws. At the same time it came with a power beyond what any mortal could fathom. Perhaps that was what caused many to just 'vamp it up' and shrug off their mortal lives. After all the human race spends many moments in their lives dreaming of greater things. Wondering about what life would be like if things were different. Whether it was if their car dove off a steep ramp and they disappeared from a life which was held together by splintering strings. Or coping with an extremely large inheritance that would change their perspective on the little things forever. There always was wandering thoughts of what would life be like if I were X and not doing Y. "Many mortals are too weak, emotionally attached, and afraid to take the plunge. As vampires the role is reversed. For most the jump in approach comes with 'who can stop me now'." It may be an understatement still, but that is how she felt on such occasion. She saw too many that leaned into the unstoppable side.

Temperance lifted her hand weighted with Angela's uneasy grasp and quickly brushed the line of red away. "The only thing that sets us apart from our old selves is the fear instilled in humans, created from those like us who wreck havoc. You are not a monster." She smiled brightly. Her weight shifted from the seat tugging the same hand along with Angela's from the booth. The public eye of the busy Metronome floor was not the place for such a show of tears. Especially an unexplainable Merlot hue. Her fingers locked in a tight grip as she guided the agitated women to her office.

Music from the main club went mute behind closed doors. The small office was not as tidy as their apartment was. A few paper piles strewn about two desks which were placed face to face. Two colorful lamps rested to each one which illuminated a few pencil holders, a laptop and pens. Crissy and Temperance shared this space when they really needed to get down to work. It was not often that they both were gone from the business, but in more recent nights the two have had their share of personal endeavors and The Metronome seemed to run like clockwork without constant supervision, so the office was left in a small mess.

She blinked once having thought about the worst possible scenario. Her dear Angela forced to choose between her job and the family she loved. Maybe it was deeper then that. Zodiac never had to say anything about her role within Tytonidae. Temperance never asked, but believed that she did it for the good of their race. Some things had been getting rough around the edges though and it could be put together at the surface as the public grew aggressive in nature when the group turned over a new leaf. Was the situation growing too rough? Too deep to bare? She did not know if that was the case and instead paused in thought to get down to the root of the problem.

She guided Angela to the chair of her desk than walked around to Crissy's side, pressed her palms to the hard surface, and leaned a bit forward as if to question a guilty party. "You cannot hide the tremble that lingers inside you, love. What is really going on?"

"Many mortals are too weak, emotionally attached, and afraid to take the plunge. As vampires the role is reversed. For most the jump in approach comes with 'who can stop me now'. The only thing that sets us apart from our old selves is the fear instilled in humans, created from those like us who wreck havoc. You are not a monster."

That made sense, but did it excuse the more aggressive among them from acting like total jerkwads (as Jennifer would say)? Over the top was, in a way, part of her persona, but only as far as showboating for clients and potential customers. If there was a rhyme and reason behind this kind of behavior, it eluded her.

Zodiac offered no resistance as Temperance pulled at her hand. She simply grabbed her bag and coat and followed her lead. Inside the quiet office, the girl sat down her belongings and Ginny stuck her head out from inside the coat to investigate. The cat jumped up on the desk and rubbed against Temperance for a moment before sitting down on the desk across from her owner. With Temperance standing like she was some trial lawyer and the cat flanking her, the whole scene had a very odd look to it.

"You cannot hide the tremble that lingers inside you, love. What is really going on?"

Well, there it was.

"Did you ever," she began slowly. "Find yourself on the outside of a joke? Everyone else gets the joke but you, so suddenly you are the source of amusement? Considering our new 'lifestyle' I feel like that a lot. Earlier tonight I set up one of my Nana's meditation rituals and asked a simple question- what if I had never been turned? I got answers. I did!" she insisted. She knew Temperance was tolerant at best on the subject of her original skills and did not exactly believe.

"But now it's like I got my answer and the only way I can express the idea is like if I was riding an iceberg and the iceberg was my answer. Problem is, my iceberg keeps hitting other icebergs and its breaking apart. Every time I try to hold onto part of the answer, other parts of it keep drifting away and maybe that's a good thing cause I didn't like the answers I saw. I ended up some burnt out old fat ***** in Mexico drunk and stoned all the time peeking out the window at 3 AM to make sure vampires weren't coming to get me or something like that."

She was becoming more animated now. Hands moving about rapidly as her mindspeak began to flow faster. "Anyway, if I was still alive my life would have been a train wreck or something, but at least I knew the rules when I was alive. I could cope, deal, adapt, go with the flow of things. But this? Everytime I think I got a grip on the idea, the game changes. The answer is always wrong. No matter what. Even with the Masq. I help keep things under control. No, what you do is bad. So we should let others run amok? No, that's bad too. Then what do you do? We don't know, and then they laugh. I feel like I am outside of the joke all the time. I don't get it or understand it. No matter what!"

She was on her feet now. Pacing the floor. Whenever things overwhelmed her, she got this way. Occasionally a word or two of Romany slipped into her thoughts as she grew more agitated. A point she tried to avoid with Temperance. She knew how her own emotions could cause her love problems being so sensitive to them and all, but it was all spilling out now like a firestorm.

"I just want to be what I was. I am not a Călătorii neobosiţi or an avenger! I ain't the police. Great Goddess I hate the police, and what am I doing? Babysitting Vampir who have no desires to manage themselves and all I get is grief for it! And it doesn't end there-oh no! Those thrice damned Juru-mi se ciocneau's. Tomes for this and tomes for that. Why doesn't someone impress me and find one that will turn me back alive?"

She looked at Tempy again. The tears flowing freely now down her cheeks again. "So much happy, yet so much confusion. Everything is supposed to be so much better, but they lied. The only thing better in my life is you. Would we still be talking if I was alive? Would we? Would you be my Amant still? I could turn my back on all of this. I had a little happy once and it was taken from me. I want that back. Oh Mater Lacrimarum I want it back."

Her hands reached out to the woman on the other side of the desk now as if begging. "A simple life. Not mixed up in the affairs of monsters and madmen. Too much to ask?"

One shot after another, in much of what she was rattling off Temperance and Angela had a few things in common. Where she meant babysitting was truly a constant thorn in the side at everything she attempted to do. Temperance was often in the same boat when taking a more leadership stance, understanding two sides of the coin, analyzing what ‘feels’ right about the situation and pointing to another perspective. Often times she even did this with Angela, but not once would she really consider it an act of babysitting. It was a passion Temperance had all to herself, the happiness, motivation of seeing how she helped others. Now in every way, Angela was right to send this blast of fury to none other than the allurist herself. If the gypsy were to blow this rage at anyone else, again, let it be wrong, or personal. Tempy felt it hitting all too close to home though. She herself was beginning to dwell on the things that torn her from reality; dramatic events that continuously shift gears from one side of the pendulum to another. Slowly but surely the allurist would lose traction, but not tonight.

”Perception kills.” The allurist stood and wrapped arms tight around her love. Gently brushing downward from silk colored locks to her middle back. It stabilized her own securities from the flow of emotions knocking down a weakening door. Like a mother calming a raging child, ”It is all not for nothing, love.” Temperance thought briefly upon the words which Angela expressed. If this was the real world, would Temperance love her the same? In the front thought of the word love, her response would be a simple no. Her father would not ever approve. In fact, Matthew was bound to ask the girl for a hand in marriage someday. She would become a housewife like her mother. Tend to the kids. Volunteer at the church. However, she couldn’t go around breaking the gypsy’s heart. Deeper into the word love, Angela and Temperance had their differences, but like every piece to a puzzle that is oddly shaped, somehow it forms a beautiful picture. Had they met as friends, the allurist most certainly agrees that the pair would still be soul mates in the sense of long term friendship. ”If we were human and you happen to come across my town. I’m sure we’d build into a wonderful relationship. It may not be the exact one we have today, but truly would still mean as much as ours does.”

”How can I fix this, love?” Temperance planted a firm kiss to the women’s forehead. ”How do I erase away all the uncertainty? Neither of us asked to become vampires. It’s not like Harper Rock had a huge warning sign outside of town telling us ‘Beware : monsters within. No turning back!” Temperance giggled a little, hoping some of that would ease on through to her as well.

”Do you think you would be somewhere else if you were human?” Temperance looked to her. ”I know I stumbled into the town. Where I grew up pales in comparison, but you were living here. What if no one here were vampires? Would you have really gone to Mexico?” She chuckled again. ”All that hot sun, I think you’d be bronzing under the sun at the beach.”

”If we were human and you happen to come across my town. I’m sure we’d build into a wonderful relationship. It may not be the exact one we have today, but truly would still mean as much as ours does.”

That made sense. It would have been insane to think they would be as they are now if the night hadn't taken them both. But she could see it. If they had been in the same town and somehow managed to cross paths. One image stood out so strongly to her. Her little kitchen nook where the two of them often sat chatting away like a pair of magpies over tea (for Tempy) and blood for the mystic. A oh-so-human concept that had followed them both over into this quazi-life. Were their conversations that much different? A bit of gossip, new stores in town, what was going on in their 'families', current events, or just laughing at the fun things in life. Despite how complex things had become for them both, how much had they figured out and solved in such a simple situation and spot.

Soulmates Temperance had called them. Best friends or sisters of a sort. She was sure the allurist had someone in her life before this, and if she was not who she was now and Randall had lived? Even if Randy and her traveled as always pictured, the occasional holiday where 'cousins' got to play as 'Crazy Aunt Angela' was back in town. Sharing family, company, good food. Some of those visions she shared with her love now. What ifs, her Nana would have called them.

”Do you think you would be somewhere else if you were human?”

Another good question. She had settled into the town nearly two years before Cobb had messed with something he was better off not messing with and brought all of this into play. But that did not mean wanderlust would not have taken her on a whim. So much yet to see. Some did not understand the allure of simply watching the road continuing to reveal what it held and the sights and secrets there, and beyond like a never ending adventure. One day, for no apparent reason she could have seen herself closing down her little flea trap of a shop she originally had, packing a few things and Ginny into the mini bus and asking Jennifer if she wanted to go see the rest of the world.

Would you have really gone to Mexico? All that hot sun, I think you’d be bronzing under the sun at the beach.”

That made her laugh. ”Oh yes,” she finally replied. ”Be a little bronze gypsy goddess on the beach telling all the amigos to back the hell off. Right. All that good food and drink? I would have been a round bronzed girl some would try to float back into the Gulf thinking they saving a whale.”

She looked up at the woman and relaxed in her embrace. "But seriously, I am just trying to wrap my head around a few things. I know you don't believe in what I do, but I kinda had a 'Magical Mystery Tour' experience earlier. Puzzling together things that could have happened and coming to the conclusion my life would have been so messed up if not for this. Weird, I had to die to get things right. I mean, the blood part and such is kinda horrid, but the rest isn't so bad, is it? Successful in ways. We got each other. Yeah?"