Attempted a raid again recently I did. Enver followed me not. Like that I do not. Missed him I did and so home I returned. Like me that is not. Not for him to miss. That normal is. For me upon that to act. Ill I am not. Perhaps something else the issue is?
~#~
A tear to the day he says it has been since last to that realm he was sent. Wished he did for to celebrate and that did we alone. While celebrate this day he might wish to. Think I do that forgotten he has how he me that day did leave. Alone. Walked out on me he did. Watching a movie we were, when he a date with his cousin did accept. Despite the fact that won she did. Like her I do. Pleasant to me she has always been. While glad I am that been so long it has since he in to that place was sent. Fear I do that one day closer now he is to his next visit. Try as I might for him from trouble to keep. Distract him every hour of every day I cannot.
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New raid there is. Wondering I am if go I shall? Leave Enver again then I must as doubt I do that he, me shall follow. Of late doing that he is not. Worried perhaps I would be if knew I did not wherein his labours lay.
~#~
Xavier me a bird did give; a cockatiel. No name to it yet have I given, for know I do not for what its name should be. Gizmo and Leeloo their names quickly did choose. So good I am not at this creature to read.
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In the raid I am though enjoying it I am not. Distracted I am and that dangerous is. Enver says does that like I do for gone to be but that untrue is. Hate I do when rest with him I cannot. Strange it feels for not at his side to be. Worry I do. For him. For me. Think perhaps I do that hates me he does for what do I must.
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Sometimes think I do that my husband me does not understand. Believes I think he does that like I do for away from him to be. Know I do not why he this would think? Pains me it does for not at his side to be. Love him deeply I do. Says he does that he no longer to California does go, as hurts me that does. For him gone to be. That true is and yet asked him I never have or to stay. Planned I did for with him to go, if go he must. Lying he is. Goes he does not as his mother here now with us is. Leave he cannot, for sick she is. Punched him today I did. While this our issue solved did not, and while issue still unresolved is. Stopped us it has not from our usual selves to be. Even if silly he is being. Even if suspect I do that hates me he does. That bored of me he shall become. Love one another we do. Only wish I do that I more restraint in front of the family had shown.
More time had I with Ivan and Whit today. Peter too of course. Sweet boy My Peter is, even if refuses he does for to accept that I his mother am. Hurts me he does for to say that, that untrue is. Whit tried for the pain to ease. For Peter to explain. But understood fully I did not what meant he did.
~#~
Oh. Almost forgot I did for to say. Enver wrong was. Leeloo fat is not. Peter said did that she pregnant is. Puppies now we can expect. Crash no longer important tasks given shall be. Though doubt I do that Enver me shall allow for the task to Andrew in his place to entrust. See we shall. Leeloo to the vets taken must be. Perhaps Peter that for us can arrange. Then Happy I can keep my husband.
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Seems it does that our argument at an end is. Even if know I do not what the outcome is. Matters not. Think I do that argue we do for to prove whom the other more does love. Miss one another we do when parted we must be. That perhaps good is. Choose I shall for that to believe.
This eve a raid together we could do. Prefer I do such things with him to do. Like I do when we together more easily can work. Violence his thing is not. But he his skillset in such places well can use. Matters not that raid already over is. Fun had I with my family. With my husband. Adore My Enver I do. Only wish I do that he his issues with Andrew could quell. Likes him he does not and uncomfortable he poor Andrew does make.
Choose I shall for my entry positively for to end. Saw today Charlotte I did. Seen her in some time I have not. Though gone she was before speak with her I could. Think of her often I do. Her and the others. But if dwell on that I do, happy as I pen my last words I shall not be. With these words finish my thoughts instead I shall. Love my family I do.
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Know now I do the issue that Enver with Andrew does take. Thinks he does that Andrew me does desire. Though perhaps knew that already I did? Of course that nonsense is. Andrew no such feelings for me does have. Know I do not the reason as to why he this feels? Crash in our home often too is. No such accusations upon him does he place. Though says Enver does that Crash his place does know. Kill him he said he would. That quite unnecessary is. Quite unnecessary indeed. No feelings have I for any other under moon or sun. Enver my world is. Even if another such feelings for me did have, perfectly able I would be for them to ignore.
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Never before have I so much credit to has path given as now I do. Typical of his breed he has become. Perhaps always has been. Perhaps noticed before I did not. His moods ever changing are. Keep up with them I cannot. Today depressed he seems. His mother unwell is. This I know. This we have for a while known. There no cure is for her. Her time upon this earth now short shall be. Difficulty having he is for this to reconcile. Think I do that perhaps guilty feels he does. Guilty that survive he shall, past his years and that hers cut short shall be. This but nature is. But helps it does not for me this to say. Losing him I am to his work. To his craft. Like I do not when talks to me he does not of what ails him so. Rather I would that he in me would confide, before entreated he must be for his secrets to tell. Better now he is. Talks more he does. But still improvement there made can be. Allow him I shall for his thoughts to gather. Perhaps then better able and more willing he shall be for them to voice.
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Distractions help do. Good it is for him busy to keep. Quite the puzzle my husband is. Thinks he does too much or too little. No happy medium in this have I seen. Act he will without thought. And think he will and not act. The former more worrying of the two is. Prefer I do for to see his mind at work. At least then know I do that trouble to our doorstep he cannot bring. Only one matter on his mind these days is. Pains me it does for him so to see. Though happier seems he does when occupied I can keep him. Raids even helping are for him distracted to keep. Know I do the day coming is when his sorrows worsen shall. But then able he shall be for to grieve.
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To the Veterinarian today Leeloo has been. Quite right we were for this task to Andrew to entrust. Crash quite the character is, but reliable he is not. With the lives of our babies I shall not trust him again. It is through his failings that we now puppies with puppies shall have. Know I do not what to expect. Try I do for Leeloo no longer to carry. Her belly quite swollen is. Extremely gentle with her I must be. Listened I have for the heartbeats to hear. For them to count. But difficult it is for the tiny sounds apart to hear. Try again I shall not. Look forward I shall for the surprise. Like I do not always for surprised to be. Or rather did not. Enver this in me changed has. Though I could hardly my husband embrace, if I to surprises could not adjust. A mystery to me My Enver often is. Even now.
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Leaving the house tonight we are not. Not unless it absolutely necessary is. Or unless he Emilee must visit. Though technically leave the house we must for the puppies to exercise. Though that a long task never is. Shorter now even as Leeloo less distance can walk before tired she is. Like I do not for her so wet to get while so delicate her condition is. Keep her home I would if she her walks so much did not still enjoy. Think I do that Enver and I movies should watch. A while it has been since we this have done. So much have we together to do and know I do that likes he does for such things to watch. Wonder I do though if this him melancholy shall make. Want to remind him I do not of his life that passed is.
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